Estate Planning in Texas: Frequently Asked Questions
Frequently Asked Questions (FAQs) About Texas Estate Planning and Probate
The time for wills and estate planning is now, not later when it might be too late to account for unknown events and conditions in the future and these frequently asked questions and answers help people understand why wills and estate planning in Texas is important. Someday we will die, but we could also become temporarily incapacitated due to a medical or physical condition. Being unavailable to make life decisions creates a burden on family and friends who may not be legally authorized to act. Estate planning documents are for everyone and plans for unknown situations should be made when all are well and healthy. An experienced will and estate planning lawyer helps advise clients on being prepared for whatever may happen during and after their lives. Estate planning in Texas is important to protect the individual, their friends, and family.
Estate Planning Attorney Leslie Barrows uses proper estate planning with Barrows Firm clients in divorce and family law cases, juvenile matters, and whenever guardians are involved. Knowing how important it is to have estate planning and power of attorney documents ready when people are alive and well, attorney Barrows frequently offers will and estate planning deals to first responders and members in the community upon whom we all rely, and who need to prepare to care for their loved ones if they cannot.
Why Do I Need Estate Planning?
Estate planning allows for the control and direction of what happens to property and provides for loved ones during life, and after. An individual estate includes the person’s ownership interests in real estate, bank accounts, investment accounts, insurance policies, retirement accounts, and all personal property such as homes, vehicles, boats, and similar personal property and items. If someone dies without a will, their community estate is distributed by state law. The Texas Estates Code contains intestate succession laws that apply when someone dies without an enforceable will. The laws of intestate succession identify a person’s descendants and distribute the community estate of the deceased, to descendants in certain portions.
Who Needs Estate Planning?
Estate planning not only covers death but also applies to decisions during life. For example, estate planning involves determining who can make healthcare, business, and financial decisions for another in the event of temporary or permanent incapacity. Estate planning also allows for the appointment of a guardian for minor children in the event of incapacity or death. Wills are an important part of an estate plan, to determine what happens to assets when an individual dies, including the proceeds of life insurance policies and other death benefits that may apply. So even though an individual might not think they have significant assets, it is still important to make sure that funeral arrangements are properly handled and paid, just for one example. Again, in life, and death, proper estate planning is important to all involved family and loved ones.
What is a Will?
A will is a formal legal document controlling what happens to the estate assets of an individual when they die. A written will names the beneficiaries who are the persons who shall receive property and assets through the will, and as well the will names the executor named to carry out the process and wishes of the decedent’s will. In Texas, a will must follow certain formalities to be valid and enforceable. An experienced Texas estate planning attorney assists their client in preparing wills and estate planning documents from simple estates to those with complex assets and beneficiary wishes. It is common for Texas family lawyers to also advise and assist clients with wills and estate planning.
What is Probate?
Probate is the legal process of satisfying the terms of the will of the deceased, in public proceedings, also called Estate Administration. If someone dies without a will, the probate court will distribute the estate by state laws of intestate succession. And when someone dies with a will, the probate court will admit the will, appoint the estate administration responsibilities, and ensure that the community estate is properly distributed, overseeing the process. In probate court, any legal challenges to the validity of a will, its contents, or acts of administrators can be litigated.
Who Can I Designate as the Executor of My Estate?
Professional fiduciaries make great estate executors because they are not usually named as beneficiaries with any interest in the community estate of the deceased. A fiduciary is an individual or organization authorized to act on behalf of another, putting the other’s interests ahead of their own. A fiduciary is legally and ethically bound to act in the other’s best interests.
Family members can also be executors of estates, but there can be conflict among family members when one person does not agree with the actions or accountings as executors. Many disputes in probate courts involve family members making objections to other family members who were named as estate executors. An estate planning attorney may advise that a client disclose who they are naming as their executor during their life so that no surprises are leading to conflict after passing.
Common Estate Planning Documents: What are About Durable Power of Attorney, and Medical Power of Attorney Documents?
When Texans get a new or updated will, it is common to also update power of attorney and healthcare documents and directives, as well as trust documents. A durable power of attorney document for financial matters names an individual who will be entrusted to handle financial decisions in the event of temporary or permanent incapacity, such as during surgery, if one is in a coma, or one simply cannot make those decisions for certain reasons. A medical power of attorney document similarly names an individual to make sure healthcare wishes and decisions are carried out during a period of incapacity.
What Are Living Wills, Also Called Advance Healthcare Directives to Physicians and Family Surrogates?
Living wills are also used to ensure end-of-life concerns and decisions are carried out as the individual planned, and in Texas, these living wills are known as advance healthcare directives, or also a Directive to Physicians and Family or Surrogates. When an individual is unable to make their wishes known because of illness or injury, these directive documents are important so that critical decisions like life support measures do not need to fall on family and friends. The living will is made by a principal and appoints an agent to carry out directives. Living wills must be made following legally required formalities and they can be revoked by the principal.
What Types of Trust Documents Are Used in Estate Planning?
Trusts are used to hold money, assets, and property interests for the beneficiary of another, where a trustee has the legal power and authority to make decisions in the best interests of the beneficiary. For example, a grandparent might leave money in their will or in a trust, to be used to pay for college and certain life expenses for a grandchild. That money or property in the trust is overseen by the trustee who is authorized to make distributions that benefit the beneficiary, as outlined in the trust. These distributions could pay for anything named in the trust, from education to housing, and whatever life expenses may be identified. Estate planning attorneys advise and represent clients about trusts and the different options to protect assets for the benefit of others.
When Should Wills, Trusts, and Estate Planning Documents Be Updated?
While most wills, trusts, and estate planning documents are written to apply to the circumstances at the time the documents are needed, certain life events require updating all estate planning documents. Examples of major life events include marriage, divorce, birth, death, and anything else that can affect the outcome of an individual’s estate planning wishes. For example, when divorcing, the former spouse might not be a preferred agent for power of attorney over medical or business affairs. Likewise, one might not want to protect the interests of children who shall someday be recipients of a divorce property settlement, in another example. Estate planning documents to be updated upon major life events also include insurance beneficiary designations, and payable on death sections of documents tied to any other life benefit, retirement policy, and similar documents.
For Wills, Trusts, and Estate Planning in Texas, the Barrows Firm in Southlake Helps Texan Families Prepare for the Future Now When All Are Hopefully Well and in Good Spirits
COBRA After Divorce: Health Insurance Options in Texas
Should I Get COBRA After Divorce in Texas, or Are There Alternative Options for Health Insurance in Texas?
After a divorce in Texas, a spouse qualifies for continuing health insurance through COBRA, at 102 percent of the plan premium, or chose an alternative short or long-term health insurance option. Keeping health insurance is important, especially when parents have dependent children. During a divorce, the Court normally orders the parties to maintain the status quo with insurance coverage, until the divorce is final. After the divorce, a spouse who will lose health insurance coverage must be notified and allowed to enroll in COBRA coverage, to remain on the current health plan until they can get new coverage on a short-term or long-term basis. Opting-in for COBRA coverage is expensive because both the employer and employee premiums must be paid, as well as a two percent administrative fee. Many parents must consider alternative health insurance plans and options that are affordable and provide necessary and required health coverage.
Related Article from Survive Divorce: A Guide to Health Insurance During and After Divorce
Children with acute and ongoing health conditions cannot be without health insurance. When divorcing in Texas the parents make agreements and the Court can order the parties to pay for healthcare expenses. Having uninsured dependent children, and former spouses is not an option. Parties not complying with the Court’s orders regarding post-divorce health insurance coverage can lead to enforcement and modification suits. Talk to your family attorneys at the Barrows Firm in Southlake to learn your rights and options.
Because the spouse with the option of enrolling in COBRA coverage must pay the full premium rate plus two percent, insurance is expensive, even at the same group rate price. Depending on the insurance plan coverage, the needs of the parent and dependent children, an alternative health plan option might make more sense financially. If there is another more affordable option, the family lawyers at the Barrows Firm can help navigate the process. Through years of networking with locally respected insurance and health care professionals, attorney Leslie Barrows has the resources to help answer the most challenging insurance questions.
Health Insurance During and After Divorce in Texas
In most families, the parents and children are enrolled in the best health insurance plan offered by the employer with the best health and medical coverage for the family’s health care needs. When someone files for divorce in Texas, one of the initial hearings is the Temporary Orders hearing, where initial determinations are made about who will live where, drive what cars, and satisfy which financial responsibilities.
In addition to COBRA health insurance coverage after a divorce in Texas, the spouse, and dependent children in need of insurance might qualify for Medicare or Medicaid. For many parents getting a divorce, the spouse in need of coverage through the employer, must wait until the next enrolment period and need a short-term coverage option in the interim. Especially with children who may have significant medical needs, a lapse in coverage can be a serious problem, and COBRA might not be the best option.
From the Barrows Firm Article Collection: Considering a summer divorce? Read our article on point, Why Starting a Divorce in June is Popular in Texas.
What is COBRA, and How Does it Work to Preserve Health Insurance Coverage After Divorce in Texas?
COBRA is the Consolidated Omnibus Budget Reconciliation Act, the law requiring health insurance providers to offer continued coverage to former spouses and dependent children after divorce. This is how COBRA applies in divorce in Texas. In other scenarios, continued health coverage under COBRA must be available after the reduction in an employee’s hours of employment, employee termination, death, or other qualifying events such as divorce.
Employees are entitled to COBRA coverage when they work for a qualified employer, which is an employer who has at least 20 employees on more than half of the working business days in the previous year.
After a Divorce in Texas, An Ex-Spouse Can Get COBRA for 18 Months, and 36 Months for Dependent Children
Following the date of divorce, the spouse being removed from the insurance plan of the other must be given notice of COBRA eligibility within 14 days, that they have within 60 days to enroll in COBRA benefits. When the spouse takes the COBRA option, they can remain on the former spouse’s health insurance plan, the one they were on before the divorce, for up to 18 months. Additional COBRA coverage is available for dependent children for up to 36 months.
Parents and children have different health care needs. A parent might cost more to insure than their children. If a child has a significant medical condition and sees physicians frequently, it might be important to keep that dependent child on COBRA coverage until a better option is available. This is another example of the different care options for families in need of health insurance after divorce.
Short-Term Versus Long-Term Health Insurance Options Instead of COBRA Coverage
In Texas, there are several options for health insurance for medical needs and care for parents and children after divorce. When a parent is getting a divorce in Texas and has the option of electing to enroll in COBRA coverage, they might also select a short-term or along-term insurance option. Whether the former spouse has employer-based coverage options coming up in an open enrolment period, or whether they chose to buy private health coverage, not through an employer, short and long-term options alternatives to COBRA are available. Considering the cost of COBRA, and the full premium cost, without the normal employer contribution, and two percent additional administrative fees, a short-term or long-term private plan might be the more cost-effective option.
Watch this YouTube Video About Short-Term &Long-Term Health Insurance Options
Short and long-term plans are different in their cost and their available benefits. For basic coverage for healthy people who do not use insurance often, a competitive short-term plan makes sense. If however, the parent or dependent children have significant medical needs, the additional benefits provided in long-term medical and health care plans can be necessary. In addition to insurance eligibility and benefits, there two other issues are policy renewals and cancellations. What if something happens to someone during a short-term policy? A Policy may be canceled, or it may not be renewable.
Because medical and health care costs are significant, especially when people have children, it is important to consult with an experienced family lawyer to help determine which options make the most sense to cover former spouses and their children.
With Questions About COBRA After Divorce and Other Health Insurance Options, Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583
Divorce with Adult Special Needs Children
There Are Unique Issues in a Divorce with Adult Special Needs Children
Some several medical conditions and disorders affect children and as they become adults their needs and challenges can change. Special needs can be physical, developmental, behavioral, and sensory-impaired. Some children are born with special needs and in others, they develop later in life. On a range of abilities to cope with stress and change, a divorce with adult special needs children requires several additional steps.
When getting a divorce in Texas and there are some additional considerations to protect the best interests of adult special needs children in the family. First, understand that in no way does having a special needs child prevent a couple from divorcing if the marriage is no longer able to be rehabilitated and repaired. Staying together because there is a special needs child, especially an adult, does not make it easier on anyone, rather it can further complicate existing problems.
Mental health professionals working with adult children with special needs can be consulted before the divorce to make a game plan that considers the limitations and conditions of the child so that the disruption to their life is minimal. In the divorce, child support is calculated and ordered in the manner best providing resources for the special needs child. Spousal maintenance may also be ordered when the custodial parent is a full-time caregiver of an adult special needs child.
Attorneys Leslie Barrows and Amanda Roark at the Barrows Firm in Southlake, work with parents divorcing who have minor, and adult special needs children. To learn your rights and options, call the Barrows Firm at (817) 481-1583.
Protecting Adult Special Needs Children and Their Best Interests in a Divorce
Negotiating child custody and visitation with a child with special needs may require the use of mental health professionals who work with families with minor, and adult special needs children. Depending on the individual medical conditions and disorders, caring for the child may be different as they age and grow into adulthood. Knowing what a day in the life may be like in the future is important in negotiating a parenting plan. Planning for an unknown future requires thinking ahead and having plans in place if things do not go as planned.
Possession and access and visitation may need to adjust on an annual or even a monthly basis depending on the changing needs of the child. Parental rights and duties are also something that can be reviewed and adjusted as the needs of the child change, especially when they are transitioning into adulthood.
Mental health professionals can help the family and their attorney understand long-term needs and care. This helps in creating estate planning and parenting arrangements. Mental health counseling for the family can also help everyone with transitions. Depending on the individual child, their reaction to a significant life change like a divorce can be much more difficult to handle.
eParent Article: 5 Ways to Advocate for a Child with Special Needs During a Divorce
Limitations in Social and Coping Skills to Handle Divorce
Divorce and child custody issues are difficult on all children, and everyone has different coping skills to handle divorce. But, when caring for adult special needs children, those social and coping skills can be put to the test, and sometimes that minor, or adult child has an extreme reaction. An autistic child, for example, might appear to be adjusting on the surface, but there can be outbursts and shutdowns on the way. In another example, a child with an emotional disorder might have a difficult time adjusting to a new school and social setting, leading to behavioral issues at school and home.
Minimizing the risk of upsetting a minor or adults special needs child requires understanding all the elements of life changes that are going to take place with the divorce and those need to be discussed among the attorneys, parents, and mental health providers, doing the best to take the sting and shock out of major life changes.
Child Support and Spousal Maintenance in Divorce with Adult Special Needs Children
In Texas, the Court may order either or both parents to provide for the support of a disabled child for an indefinite time based on the Court’s findings. The Court makes findings of whether the child will be able to at any time self-support themselves, whether institutionalized or not. Where the disability exists before the child’s 18th birthday, the Court orders support for the child to be paid to the custodial parent. The Court may also designate a special needs trust providing that support be paid directly to the trust instead of the state disbursement unit.
When the Court determines a party’s eligibility to receive spousal maintenance when that parent is the custodian of a child of the marriage of any age, requiring substantial care and personal supervision because of a physical or mental disability parenting the spouse from earning sufficient income to provide for their reasonable needs. Also, in certain situations, it may be appropriate to determine if the needs of the child should impact the division of the marital estate. As well, ask your lawyer about obtaining additional social security disability benefits from the Federal government, and any other assistance programs.
Special Needs Alliance Article: Divorce and Children with Special Needs
Special Needs Trusts for Adult Children
When determining the available resources to pay for the needs of a minor or adult special needs child, money may be coming from child support, spousal maintenance, part of the community estate, Social Security disability, Medicaid, and whatever other sources, and a certain amount of that money can be directly paid to a special needs trust or a supplemental needs trust.
In a special needs trust, the trustee holds and manages the assets for the beneficiary child. The trustee is responsible for making financial distributions and making payments as needed. A special needs trust is important because, without that formality, the money received by the child could be considered income, affecting eligibility for Social Security benefits.
Need Advice on Divorce with Adult Special Needs Children? Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake, Texas at (817) 481-1583
Changes to Discovery Rules in Texas Divorce
Discovery in Texas Divorce Cases Involves the Exchange of Information
The first of the changes to discovery rules in Texas divorce lawsuits is about Level One discovery, which now applies to many more divorces and requires an expedited exchange of personal and financial information. The Texas rules of civil procedure list the rules for a discovery control plan in levels. There are Levels One, Two, and Three. Discovery can be written and can be oral testimony. Common discovery tools in Texas divorces include disclosures, interrogatories, requests for production, requests for admission, and depositions where the parties provide oral testimony recorded by audio and video. The recent changes to discovery rules in Texas Divorce became effective for new cases filed on or after January 1, 2021. For most intents and purposes, the changes in the rules are for the divorce lawyers to worry about, but as a client, it is helpful to be aware of the process.
Because every divorce is unique, the parties may enter an agreement or ask the Court to order different discovery terms and schedules. Know that in some divorces, the parties agree to what discovery exchanges they will perform, if any. So, if the parties come to their divorce lawyers and they already agree on settling finances and they agree on who gets what, there is no need to use discovery in their divorce. However, it is more common for divorces to involve discovery exchanges.
Read Our Article for More Information: What is the Divorce Process in Texas?
How Do Changes to Discovery Rules in Texas Affect Divorcing Clients
When getting a divorce in Texas, your divorce lawyer lets you know how the process works and when you will be expected to produce documents and information in the discovery process. At the Barrows Firm in Southlake, attorneys Leslie Barrows, and Amanda Roark as well as the paralegals and staff are available to help with questions along the way. For example, a discovery request from the other side might be looking for documents that are unavailable or in the other party’s possession. There might also be confusing questions, and it may be difficult to respond. Do not worry, at the end of the day the discovery process is a necessary part of divorce and it helps the attorneys, parties, and the Court understand what issues, assets, and people are involved in the divorce process.
Interesting Article: Divorce Rates and COVID-19
What is Level One Discovery, and What Changes Were Made to Discovery Rules and Limits?
Level One discovery now applies to divorces in which the parties claim the marital estate is worth less than a total amount of $250,000and this limit is an increase over the previous limit of $50,000. Note that Level One discovery does not apply to divorces involving children. In a Level One divorce, the discovery period starts when the initial disclosures are due,30 days after the Answer to the Petition for Divorce, and then the discovery period continues until 180 days after those initial disclosures are due. Not only does the window of time change, but the amount of time also allowed for depositions has changed. Now the parties may spend more than six hours taking depositions and they may now use up to 20 hours examining deposition witnesses. Note that the parties need not use the entire deposition time, and the more that can be accomplished and settled outside a deposition, the more resources are saved.
Level Two Changes to Discovery Rules in Texas Divorce
A Level Two divorce discovery plan applies now when the parties seeking a divorce have alleged owning community property and assets greater than $250,000. Level Two discovery begins when the initial disclosures are due, just like in a Level One divorce, but they continue longer and can continue until 30 days before a scheduled trial date. In a Level Two divorce, each side may use up to 50 hours in a deposition, to examine and cross-examining parties on the opposing side, and their experts. Additionally, under the changes to discovery rules in Texas divorce, if one side discloses more than two experts, the other side may have an additional six hours of total deposition time for each additional expert. Level Two discovery also limits interrogatories to no more than 25 written interrogatories to be answered by the other side.
Disclosures After Changes to Divorce Discovery Rules
While it has been common to serve discovery requests along with petitions for divorce, and under the changes to discovery rules in family cases, discovery may not be served on the other party until after the initial disclosures are due. If certain information is subject to claims of privilege, that still applies. In Texas divorce, the parties may request and obtain discovery information and documents that are relevant and not privileged. A privileged communication must be something that may only be shared between two people, such as an attorney and their client’s communications are privileged and not subject to disclosure.
The biggest change with the new rules is that disclosures are automatically required instead of requested. Copies of documents must be served with the response. Given the time limitations in complying with the new disclosure requirements, divorce lawyers are going to learn the best methods to obtain necessary information from clients to meet disclosure deadlines. Preparation and organization are important.
Do Not Lie: What Happens When You Lie on Your Divorce Documents?
Divorcing Parties Can Agree to Change their Discovery Level
While the legislative intent behind the changes to the discovery rules was a quicker, more efficient, and cost-effective process, not everyone will like these changes and there is a proper way to address issues. For example, the requirement to produce a large number of documents in such a short time at the beginning of the lawsuit might create a burden on one or both of the parties. Depending on the financial information and complexity of asset and property issues, the parties can agree to change their discovery level and they can also ask the Court to enter an order that cures any of the problems in the case because of the new rules and limitations they impose.
Who Pays for Discovery in Texas Divorce Cases?
The general rule in divorce in Texas is that each side pays their own attorneys fees and costs to produce and exchange discovery documents. There are situations when it is appropriate for one attorney to ask the Court to order the other party to contribute or pay attorneys fees and that is the subject of a different article. Generally, unless one of the parties has done something wrong or is intentionally causing problems in the process, the parties pay for their discovery costs. If a party to the divorce action is causing problems, the Court can hold them in contempt as well as order them to contribute to pay the fees of the other.
Questions About Changes to Discovery Rules in Texas Divorce, Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583
Financial Considerations Before Filing for Divorce
Addressing Financial Considerations Before Divorce Helps Family Lawyers Best Represent Clients
The two most common issues in a divorce in Texas are money and custody, and in this article, we focus on the important financial considerations before the divorce. When we talk about money, we include the values of property that must be disclosed in a divorce. Depending on your situation, you may be splitting the community estate 50/50 or using another method of fair and just property division. Texas is a community property state and that means that all the property acquired during the marriage is considered the property of both spouses subject to division. Alternatively, the property can be classified as separate property and the property can be addressed in a private contract such as a premarital agreement or post-marital agreement among spouses. Before you file for divorce, it is necessary to collect as much financial information as possible so that your family lawyer can advise you and bring in necessary financial professionals depending on your situation.
At the Barrows Firm in Southlake, Attorneys Leslie Barrows and Amanda Roark advise and represent families with Divorce, Child Custody, Adoption, Estate Planning, Wills, and Probate Matters. Call the Barrows Firm at (817) 481-1583.
Talk to a Financial Advisor and Meet With a Family Lawyer
Financial advisors and family lawyers work together to help clients determine the best options for the family and their future. Some of the financial considerations before divorce involve joint debts and student loans, dividing up businesses during divorce, and divorce taxation regarding retirement accounts. For example, if the family has business ownership interests, a financial professional can help review the business assets and relative ownership interests of the spouses to determine who owns what. Especially in smaller family-owned businesses, things can be complicated and it takes some work to determine the property rights of each spouse in the divorce. At the Barrows Firm in Southlake, attorney Leslie Barrows has long-standing relationships with financial advisors who are well-experienced in even the most challenging divorce financial situations. A specific financial advisor used in divorce cases is called a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst.
A Certified Divorce Financial Analyst Can Help You Project Best Financial Outcomes
A Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA) helps divorce clients with the financial issues that will affect them for the rest of their lives. The work of a CDFA includes matters of separate versus marital property, valuing and dividing property, and retirement assets and pensions, to start. A CDFA becomes especially important in financial considerations before divorce when tax and financial issues affect the divorce, including issues regarding spousal and child support and dividing assets such as homes. An example of the issues addressed by a CDFA is whether the spouse needs liquid cash accounts to manage, or whether they would prefer receiving funds in qualified retirement accounts, as well as homes and assets not otherwise in cash form.
From the Institute for Divorce Financial Analysts: Why Hire a CDFA Professional
Knowing Your Financial Status Before Filing for Divorce
Gathering financial documents before filing for divorce is important, because the more you share with your family lawyer, the better they can help. Waiting until after the divorce is filed and served could cause an angry spouse to restrict access to information and change passwords on accounts. Anticipating an emotional reaction makes sense because divorce is a major life event and many spouses act out in ways they normally do not do with one another.
Make copies of all the known and available statements. If all the statement copies are not available, do not worry because the family lawyer can help you get them directly or through the discovery process in the divorce case. If you know the name of the financial institution and account numbers, that can make it easier to find the missing pieces later. Online account access makes it easy to collect your financial information and send it to your family lawyer to review when putting together your financial disclosures that are required in a divorce.
U.S. News & World Report: Financial Steps to Take Before, During and After Your Divorce
Finding Assets and Financial Considerations During the Divorce Process
After a new divorce lawsuit is filed, the parties often attend a Temporary Orders hearing so that the parties and the Court can determine who drives what, who lives where, and how the family will be financially supported during the divorce process. In preparing for a Temporary Orders hearing, and during the initial stages of the divorce, the family lawyer works with the client to obtain a full financial outlook of the parties and the marriage to determine the financial issues. Remember that it is most important that the family lawyers and the Court can create a complete picture of the finances of the family so that the financial rights and duties can be determined.
During the discovery process, the family lawyer has several legal tools and processes to obtain the necessary information to present to the client and the Court. Please understand that there are many situations where one spouse has more control over the information than the other. It is important to do the best one can to collect and present information and financial considerations before divorce.
To Learn More About the Divorce Process and Financial Considerations Before Divorce, Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583
Adoptions Affected by COVID-19 in 2021
Adoptions Affected by COVID-19: Common Pandemic Problems Affecting Texas Families
The COVID pandemic forced many people to look at their lives and focus on what is most important. So many of us realized the importance of family, especially in times when we were not able to be with loved ones. 2020 was difficult for families, and it was particularly tough on foster children hoping to be adopted into forever families. Adoptions in Tarrant County were down in 2020, as reported by different adoption agencies. For a variety of reasons, the process of adoptions became a challenge during the pandemic. Also, many mothers decided to keep their newborns and be their loving parents. Meanwhile, in addition to adoptions affected by COVID-19, foster parents in many cases are concerned about the virus and are not taking in as many foster children who need stable homes.
As we move forward in 2021, getting vaccinated, and getting back into healthy routines, we hope that adoption prospects and success stories abound. With questions and concerns about adoptions, the Barrows Firm in Southlake is available to assist and offer referrals to great agencies like the Gladney Center in Fort Worth. Adopting a child into a forever family is a great way to share the love and make a difference.
People and Parents Looking to Adopt
There are many reasons people adopt a child. Some children are adopted when a birth mother selects an individual or couple to adopt and raise her child. In other cases, children are adopted from the foster system. The people who adopt children in Texas have stories they tell about why they chose to adopt children. Some are unable to have their children, others have children who have grown up and there is still room to add an adopted child to the family. In many cases, people first become foster parents and may later adopt their foster child.
COVID-19 Affected the Adoption Process
There is a process to become an adoptive parent. The meetings and time required to become a foster parent and to adopt a child require a serious commitment. And during the pandemic, the process changed. No longer able to have in-person meetings and connections, some people decided to wait until after COVID-19 to resume the adoption process. Many feel that Zoom meetings are useful but not the same as in-person meetings, and adoption is a serious and emotional life event for all involved. When the intimacy of the adoption process is interrupted, we can understand how adoptions affected by COVID-19 can be on hold.
Uncertainty is a significant factor in decision making and family planning. Consider how many people had no idea whether their jobs and small businesses would be there to support another child, let alone the current family. Hopefully, as vaccinations continue to become available, and as the science surrounding the pandemic helps us all fight to wipe it out, more people can feel comfortable resuming the adoption process affected by the pandemic.
Adoption Placement Agencies Reporting a Slower Year in 2020
For the many reasons COVID-19 affected the adoption process, many adoption agencies in Tarrant and Denton Counties reported fewer adoption placements in 2020. November is national adoption month and adoption and foster rates decreased. November was also the month of an election that caused all kinds of emotions and concerns as we all waited for the promise of vaccines.
A recent article by Very Well Family, COVID-19 Has Had Significant Effect on Foster and Adoption Rates, suggests that there are options for adoptions during the pandemic if people are open to a change in the regular adoption and fostering process. In-home visits, for example, can be delayed by pandemic restrictions and adoption agency policies. It is recommended that anyone interested in adopting contact local agencies with a virtual process and participating in foster-to-adopt plans.
Mothers Changing Their Mind and Deciding to Parent Their Child
Expecting mothers working from home and spending more time at home due to COVID-19 restrictions and safety precautions are changing their minds and keeping more babies to raise themselves. It is easy to imagine how busy we all were before the pandemic, and how so many expecting mothers felt like they did not have the time or resources to be a parent. The reality of isolation and loneliness might have caused several women to reconsider their priorities and being a mother became a new and exciting prospect.
It is easy to let priorities become unbalanced and it is easy to take things and people for granted. Not being able to see families face to face has been difficult for many people who have had lots of time to think about their priorities and what is truly most important in life.
COVID-19 Bed Shortages and Foster Placement Interruptions
Foster children removed from their homes are sleeping in shelters. They have nowhere to go. Shelters, churches, CPS offices and makeshift bedrooms are being used to house foster children who cannot otherwise be placed in foster homes. In many of these facilities, complaints surface about unsafe conditions and fighting among teens.
The number of foster homes decreased due to several conditions, including COVID-19. Also, investigations in the Texas foster care program over allegations of abuse impact placement capacities. Sadly, there are no homes for these children right now. However possible, hopefully, more loving people will become foster parents and help get these kids into safe homes.
Call the Barrows Firm for Referrals to Local Adoption Agencies, and for Assistance in Becoming a Foster or Adoptive Parent Even While Adoptions Are Affected by COVID-19
COVID-19 Child Support Issues and Options
COVID-19 Child Support: Job and Income Losses Affect a Parent’s Ability to Pay Child Support
The December2020 Jobs Report indicated a decrease in jobs for the first time since April. The current report is that 140,000 jobs are no longer available. The unemployment rate has remained steady since April, holding at 6.7 percent. With election-year uncertainty and so much debate over the Coronavirus, many Americans are being cautious with spending, and with slow spending comes a lack of reason for companies to hire new employees, affecting the ability of many to pay child support because of COVID-19.
The long-term impact of serious financial conditions and ongoing business closures takes time to affect people, and some take a harder hit than others. Consider a local restaurant owner taking every step in their power to keep their doors open and pay their employees and vendors. At the end of the day, the local restaurant and other small business owners might not be drawing any income for themselves.
In Southlake, Attorney Leslie Barrows has been a divorce and family lawyer for many years, and she has seen and heard many reasons there is a problem with child support payments. Her experience matters in helping clients make smart choices in addressing COVID-19 child support issues.
Texas Attorney General: Child Support and COVID-10
People Ask, What Are Common Reasons Child Support Is Not Being Paid?
First, let us assume that parents ordered to pay child support are subject to an Income Withholding Order and the human resources or payroll department directly withholds the amount of monthly child support due, which goes to the Texas Child Support Disbursement Unit, who gives the support money to the child support recipient. This scenario is easy to understand when we think about how the collection and distribution of child support are supposed to work. But what happens when the real story is more complex?
If the child support obligor is self-employed and or has greatly varying income, the child support process can be a challenge. In many cases, you must go to court for an order of enforcement if payments are not being paid, or for modifications, if there is a substantial change in the income of the obligor parent.
The reasons child support payments are not being made could be anything from job loss to reduction in income. In other cases, a parent willfully refuses to make scheduled child support payments in the correct amount to be spiteful. There are many ways your family lawyer can handle a spirited non-payer.
Unique COVID-19 Pandemic-Related Job Loss and Child Support
Many people lost jobs or experienced temporary or permanent reductions in income as a direct result of COVID closures. It is important to immediately notify your attorney if this happens. It might be necessary to file a case to modify child support obligations to affect the net resources of the child support obligor. As many legal issues are litigated over Zoom calls, a modification or enforcement case can proceed that way. Understand that some courts may be behind with a backlog of suits affected by the Coronavirus court closures and disruptions.
Trying to find a new job is imperative. A judge is not going to appreciate inaction when it comes to making money to support children. Even if the previous income was higher and the job lost, was significant, anything to bring in money is helpful while getting back to where things were.
Resource: Tarrant County Financial Assistance – COVID-19
Some parents with job losses are receiving unemployment benefits, but what about those who are self-employed and cannot get unemployment? Some are selling personal assets to pay child support. If it is possible, and there is a problem with child support, consider working it out directly with the other parent. Communicate what is known and what is expected. For example, if the interruption to income is going to be temporary, it might be possible to avoid the expense of going to court for enforcement or modification. After things stabilize financially, any unpaid amounts can be figured out.
Consequences for Nonpayment of Child Support in Texas
The Texas Office of the Attorney General has all kinds of tools to enforce child support obligations. If someone loses income it is up to them to get their child support obligation modified, because otherwise the unpaid support amounts add up and so can the enforcement actions.
These are some of the actions the Attorney General can take to enforce a child support order:
· License Suspension: driver's license, professional license, hunting, and fishing licenses can all be suspended for failure to pay support.
· Passport Denial: a noncustodial parent not paying child support can be denied a new passport as well as the renewal of a current passport.
· Liens: a lien can be filed against property, bank accounts, retirement accounts, life insurance policies, personal injury claims, insurance settlements, and other assets, for nonpayment of child support.
· Credit Bureau Reporting: the law requires the amount of child support owed and paid to be reported to the major credit reporting agencies.
· Lottery Intercept: lottery prizes may be intercepted and used to pay past-due child, medical, and dental support.
· Civil or Criminal Contempt: a civil contempt charge for nonpayment of child support includes a specific number of days in jail and/or a fine for missed payments, meanwhile a criminal contempt charge isalso available to put the obligor in jail until they comply with the court order and pay a “purge” amount or all the support in arrears.
Options for Child Support Recipients Who Are Not Receiving Child Support Payments
Call the lawyer and talk about the available options. Remember that aggressively enforcing child support can impede the obligor’s availability to make money. If the Attorney General takes their driver's license, professional license, and makes it nearly impossible to earn an income, expect less. Remember that there are many cases where past-due child support payments add up and then get paid off with the cooperation of co-parents who always remain in the best interests of the child.
Filing a Lawsuit for Enforcement or Modification of Child Support Obligations
Here at the Barrows Firm, our attorneys, paralegals, and staff understand that some people are determined not to obey the Court’s Order and will avoid their duties whenever possible. Especially during something as overwhelming as a pandemic, some people think they can fall between the cracks and not get caught intentionally shirking child support obligations. A common scenario is when the obligor loses a job or has a business income loss and misrepresents their finances and net resources. That is not a game anyone recommends playing because the Judges and lawyers have all heard it before and the outcome on the willful non-payor can be significant.
Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake for Legal Advice forCOVID-19 Child Support Issues Questions at (817) 481-1583
End of Year COVID Updates and Family Law Issues
So Long, 2020: COVID, Christmas, and Challenges for Texas Families
As 2020 winds down and we are days away from Christmas and New Years, the Barrows Firm wishes all a Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays as we pass along some end of year COVID updates and family law issues to consider for current and upcoming divorces and child custody cases.
In addition to COVID, the usual Christmas and New Years’ challenges concern Texas families with divorce, child support, and holiday possession issues. Even the best plans for the holidays that follow the court order and agreements among co-parents can be interrupted. From resolving visitation conflicts and concerns about drinking too much, Attorney Leslie Barrows and all at the Barrows Firm in Southlake are hoping everyone has the best holiday season and will be in touch if it is necessary.
Divorce and family law case filings usually spike in January after many have decided it is time to call it quits or time for a modification or enforcement of an existing Court Order. New divorce cases will follow the extended Standing Order in Tarrant County and the new discovery rules in Texas divorces in 2021.
For Texas Divorce and Family Law Advice and Counsel, Contact the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583
Is Everyone Ready for Christmas and New Years'?
In a recent article, we addressed Holiday Possession Schedules and said, check your Court Order if there are questions or issues related to the holidays and visitation. With the year of COVID disrupting life, many are adapting and being flexible to challenges and potential conflict. However, there are still scheduling and life conflicts that arise and need attention. The Barrows Firm attorneys are ready to assist with finding resolutions to problems so everyone can enjoy the holidays.
Sadly, holidays can bring out the worst in some people who already have anxiety over the season. Adding the stress and challenges of the year of COVID, the normal concern about alcohol abuse and all that comes from it is now an elevated concern as we say goodbye to 2020. While we hope everything goes well, some parents want their child custody judge to order alcohol monitoring, as we shared in our recent article. Especially during the 2020 holiday season, we hope everyone is responsible with choices and that everyone makes good choices that are in the best interests of the children.
Psychology Today: Substance Abuse in Divorce Is as Complicated as You’d Think
Tarrant County: Second Amended Temporary Emergency Standing Order
Recently, the Tarrant County Amended Temporary Emergency Standing Order that went into effect on May 30, 2020, was effectively extended into 2021. That order expires on December 31, 2020. The Second Amended Temporary Emergency Standing Order is effective January 1, 2021, and expires February 1, 2021, unless extended further by the Court’s order.
This Standing Order applies in every divorce suit and every suit affecting the parent-child relationship, filed in Tarrant County or pending in the undersigned courts during the effective dates.
This Order is pursuant to the Texas Supreme Court’s First Emergency Order Regarding the COVID-19 State of Disaster. Standing Orders generally are used to automatically order the parties in a divorce or family case to maintain the status quo and not disturb people or property once the suit is filed and until it is finalized.
The Tarrant County Courts in which this Standing Order applies are:
- Judge Jesus Nevarez in the 231st District Court,
- Judge Judith G. Wells in the 325th District Court,
- Judge Kenneth Newell in the 233rd District Court, and
- Judge James Munford in the 322nd District Court.
Issues Addressed in the Second Amended Temporary Emergency Standing Order:
- No Disruption of Children;
- Protection of Family Pets or Companion Animals;
- Conduct of the Parties During the Case;
- Preservation of Property and Use of Funds During Divorce Case;
- Personal and Business Records in Divorce Case;
- Insurance in Divorce Case;
- Specific Authorizations in Divorce Case;
- Service and Application of This Order;
- Effect of Other Court Orders;
- Bond Waiver
New Discovery Rules in Texas Divorce
For all new Texas divorce and family law cases filed on or after January 1, 2021, there are new discovery rules. The good news for lawyers is that some fellow family law attorneys like the new rules. The challenge for lawyers is that new rules can lead to disagreements. The best news is that to clients with new cases filed, their lawyers are the ones who navigate the discovery process. One of the goals of the legislative change and the creation of new rules is to streamline the divorce discovery process and make things better for the families involved. Of course, there are opportunities and exceptions where the new rules can be set aside if there is a good cause. The attorneys at the Barrows Firm happily answer questions about the divorce process.
The Barrows Firm in Southlake is Open for Divorce and Family Law Matters
Everyone at the Barrows Firm is committed to safety and stopping the spread of COVID. From cleaning and sanitizing the office to maintaining appropriate safety measures, the Barrows Firm puts the needs of the client first. We also have several ways we can communicate and conference in-person and by Zoom and other electronic communication. During 2020 the family law community and Courts implemented new ways of handling divorce and child custody cases. As is usually the case, there are frequent new divorce cases, and other cases for enforcements or modifications, that are filed shortly after Christmas and the holidays. The Barrows Firm in Southlake shares end of year COVID updates and family law issues so people can make the best choices be the best parents.
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays from the Barrows Firm in Southlake
Wills and Estate Planning: Taking Action on End of Life Decisions
Why Wills and Estate Planning Documents Are Best When Everyone is Healthy
This holiday season is one like no other, and with concerns of health and those who have passed, the conversation about wills and estate planning is important. While some families enjoy traditional Thanksgiving, Christmas, and New Years' celebrations with immediate and extended families, many are not together in-person this season. Because of COVID-19, flu, and other health concerns, many are sticking around home and doing family Zoom calls.
Thinking back to last year, many had no clue what was about to hit in 2020. Was the best of times with certain loved ones already passed? Did someone in the family get sick with Coronavirus and is having a hard time bouncing back? Is the table setting for the holidays forever a question moving forward?
American Psychological Association: Coronavirus Anxiety
Giving family members the best gift this holiday season, give the gift of peace of mind. Please set aside time to talk about and move forward with wills and estate planning. Especially among families with senior parents, it is an easier discussion about the end of life while everyone is still alive and well. Not resolving issues among family members now, can make it so much worse later. Nobody wants to end up in a contested probate case with heated arguments with family. Attorney Leslie Barrows says, “Trust me, it is so much easier on everyone to plan for the inevitable when everyone is happy and in good health.”
Wishing everyone a joyous holiday season from the Barrows Firm in Southlake, we all hope important family discussions take place about what happens in the event of our passing on. To set up a consultation with one of the Barrows Firm estate planning attorneys in the Southlake office, please call us to get the ball rolling (817) 481-1583.
How COVID-19 Affected Our Notions of Health and Living Forever
No matter how well anyone is prepared for the loss of a loved one, the reality of death is always difficult and it brings up all kinds of reactions and emotions. When a family member becomes sick with COVID-19, it hits the whole family. To make uncomfortable matters worse, an aging parent with pre-existing health concerns could be the subject of a family arguing over COVID safety. And if someone is pointing a finger at another, if a family member gets sick or dies from Coronavirus, the gloves start coming off.
Here at the Barrows Firm, a few of us know from experience how difficult it can be when even the most prepared people face the passing of a parent, sibling, or relative. By talking about the inevitabilities in life, it can be easier for everybody to prepare for a loved one’s last days.
Get Power of Attorney of Healthcare and Property Established Before It Becomes Too Late
When a loved one is not able to make their own decisions about healthcare and property, their appointed power of attorney can manage their affairs, sign documents, and enter into appropriate agreements on their behalf. Power of attorney documents become effective when triggered by a certain event, like the temporary or permanent incapacity of another. For example, being in a medically induced coma will cause a power of attorney's right to make important care decisions about a loved one.
Read more about power of attorney options in our blog article, Texas wills, and estate planning for everyone, all adults.
Becoming Executor of a Family Member’s Estate: Avoiding Will Contests and Litigation in the Future
In Texas, the executor of an estate plays an important role. When preparing a will and estate planning documents it is important to understand the roles of an executor. In many families, the individual preparing their will and estate planning affairs will let other members of the family know who the executor will be when the time comes. That way, everyone can accept the present intent and wishes of the person making these important decisions.
What Does the Executor Do?
- Executors locate and communicate with the beneficiaries named in the last will and testament of the deceased.
- Providing notice to the creditors, and paying the bills of the decedent is the job of the executor.
- The executor identifies protects, and manages the assets of the decedent for proper distribution, as stated in their will.
- Executors prepare and direct the filing of the decedent's final tax returns.
- Accounting for the assets and payments made, and distribution to heirs is the executor’s job.
Kiplinger: 7 Tips on Choosing the Right Executor for Your Will
Too often there are disagreements among family members and the named executor, so making that decision and letting others know while everyone is well and healthy can protect family members from will contests and litigation.
What Happens When Mom or Dad Live In Another State?
Believe it or not, some of our 28 million Texans grew up in, or have parents living in other states. When wills and estate planning documents are prepared in other states, and a parent or loved one passes as a resident of another state, children in Texas may need to become involved in the process, particularly when named as the executor in the will.
An executor in Texas, named in a will in Georgia, for example, can do much of what is necessary by email and phone calls. As well they might need to travel to Georgia, or another state to exercise their duties as executors. When the laws of another state apply, the executor can hire an attorney in that other state to assist. Likewise, if the decedent is a Texas resident, and the executor is out of state, that executor can hire a probate attorney in Texas.
Setting Up Wills, Trusts, and Other Estate Planning Documents To Avoid Probate
In some families, the preparations take place so that the person who passes, distributes their assets and liabilities directly to beneficiaries without going through probate. The process of probate is the court’s formal process for receiving a will and overseeing the executor in their duties. When problems arise in the process of probate, litigation can be serious and expensive. For this reason, many families use trusts and other estate planning documents so that assets pass without probate.
For All-Important Family Matters, Including Wills and Estate Planning, Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake (817) 481-1583
Holiday Possession Schedules: Check Your Court Order
Standard Possession Orders in Texas
The Texas Standard Possession Order sets the family’s calendar for time of possession and access for the primary parent and the non-primary parent with visitation time. In Texas family law, child custody orders refer to parenting time, calling it possession and access which essentially means the same thing as visitation. The Standard Possession Order incorporated into your custody agreement is the schedule you and the other parent can rely upon for parenting times. Many co-parents like the Standard Possession Order, especially over the holidays, because the time between parents is distributed and uses alternating odd and even-numbered years to equalize holiday time with children.
In some custody cases, parents come to agree upon a customized schedule that works, incorporating some or all the Standard Possession Order schedules. Additionally, if you both agree as parents to do your own thing and informally trade days as it may be fair, then everyone wins.
If you have any questions about your holiday possession schedules for the 2020 Thanksgiving and Christmas breaks, please check your court order to determine who has the children, and when. Southlake Family Law Attorney Leslie Barrows is always available to help you.
Considering Family Travel for Thanksgiving or Christmas? Use the CDC COVID-19 Travel Planner
Consider First the Best Interests of the Children
Few people in the world say that 2020 was a banner year, and for many, some constant challenges and setbacks can make Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays even bumpier than in years without a COVID-19 pandemic, restrictions, virtual school, limitations on activities, and so forth. At the end of the day, we all hope that life gets as close to what we used to consider normal. In the meantime, as parents we only have one chance to raise our children with love and security, giving them the best chances in life. And in 2020, if it means making compromises and different choices, it is important to put the best interests of children first, when wrestling with holiday possession schedules.
AARP: Families Weith the Options and Risks of Gathering, Through a Pandemic Lens
Thanksgiving Visitation for 2020
Standard Possession Orders alternate parenting time on Thanksgiving between odd and even years. During an odd-numbered year, the noncustodial parent has possession of the children over Thanksgiving. Since 2020 is an even-numbered year, the primary, custodial parent has possession of the children for Thanksgiving.
The beginning of Thanksgiving possession begins at 6:00 p.m. on the day school is dismissed for the break, continuing through 6:00 p.m. on the following Sunday or Monday depending on what is stated in the order. If you have extended possession time, Monday is the end of your Thanksgiving break with the children.
Christmas Visitation for 2020
For Christmas, our Standard Possession Orders split the break into two, divided like Thanksgiving, based on even and odd-numbered years. During those odd-numbered years, the primary custodial parent has the right to possession of the children from the day school is dismissed, until noon on December 28th. At that time, the non-custodial parent has the right to visitation with the children beginning at noon on the 28th, and through 6:00 p.m. the day before school resumes, or on the day school starts again if the parent has extended possession time.
Since 2020 is an even year, the non-custodial parent has visitation time with the children for the first part of Christmas break, until noon on the 28th, and then the primary custodial parent has the right to possession for the remainder of Christmas Break and until school starts again after the break.
What Happens When Schools Dismiss Children Early?
With COVID-19, schools may be announcing earlier dismissal days, at least for Thanksgiving. Some schools went to virtual school for some time before this year’s Thanksgiving week off. The question then becomes, if the school dismissal times change, do I still pick my child up at 6 p.m. or at the time school is dismissed? Attorney Leslie Barrows notes that the Barrows Firm receives these questions, and Leslie reminds us to check our current court order.
Many local Independent School Districts announced early dismissal days this year and just like other elements of our lives and schedules, this year many will need to adjust their schedules based on what schools are doing, and then reconcile that among co-parents.
Having Problems Agreeing on Holiday Possession Schedules for 2020?
With the decreased likelihood of significant travel this year, based on COVID-19 concerns and recommended restrictions, more families might be spending Thanksgiving and Christmas at home and enjoying the time of others virtually. Some say it might not be so bad saying hello to a few people for some time on Zoom, or a family phone call. In some families, this might be a saving grace for some who with a smile on their face, quietly dread the stress of the holidays.
Regardless of what families plan, things can always change last minute. If for some reason you do not get the time with your children you expect, you have plenty of options to make up that time. For example, missed holiday time could be added to another holiday or spring or summer break.
Need the Court to Intervene? That Can Also be an Option
Despite the best efforts at co-parenting and being flexible, especially during 2020, there are some family events and holiday celebrations that are unique and worth asking your judge to rule. It all depends on the facts in your situation, whether you will be successful with a trip to court on your holiday possession schedule. One example may be international or long-distance domestic travel. If your parents are coming to visit you and your family from far away, you might not want to compromise. Especially in 2020, some families are deciding not to fly and are driving long road trips to see family.
Call the Barrows Firm if you have a difficult situation with holiday possession schedules and need legal advice and representation. Sometimes getting the lawyers involved can be effective and your problems can be resolved by a special agreement outside of going to court. That said, if you do need to get on the Court’s Docket, the earliest you contact your lawyer, the better.
Everyone here at the Barrows Firm in Southlake Wishes You All a Happy Thanksgiving and a Merry Christmas! We Are Here for You if You Need Us (817) 481-1583
Celebrating National Adoption Day: What You Can Do
Would You Consider Adopting or Being a Foster Parent?
National Adoption Day raises awareness of children in foster care who need permanent families and forever homes. Since 2000, courts and communities finalize and celebrate thousands of adoptions of children from foster care. Many observe National Adoption Day every year on the Saturday before Thanksgiving Day. This year we celebrate families and their newly adopted sons and daughters on Saturday, November 21. And while in light of COVID-19 the customary events and in-court celebrations may be different or not taking place, it is more important than ever to share and tell others about foster children in need of adoption into forever families.
Attorney Leslie Barrows has been involved with the Tarrant County National Adoption Day program for years and has served as an events chair. “Bringing adoptive parents and foster children together and into permanent homes is among the most rewarding things I get to do.” Leslie Barrows says.
You Can Help Us Raise Awareness About Adopting
- Share Information About Adoption: Adoption from Foster Care - AdoptUSKids
- Find a Group on Social Media to Join and Learn: Adoptive Families on Facebook
- Donate to Support the Gladney Center for Adoption: Donate
- Post photos from virtual adoptions or past events on social media with the hashtag #NationalAdoptionDay and the tag @DTFA so that the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption can share your posts.
The Gladney Center for Adoption in Fort Worth, Texas
Families in the Fort Worth area and all over DFW can start their journey to adopt at the Gladney Center for Adoption. Parents adopting children through the Gladney New Beginnings Parent Adoption Program attend required training to adopt children from the Texas foster care system. Children separated from their birth families have experienced significant life events and need proper emotional care and attention. The Gladney Center extends its support to families during and after adoption to help ensure that everything is working well.
The Gladney Center also works with expectant mothers choosing families to adopt a child of an unplanned pregnancy. Mothers who are looking to family to adopt her child receive care and counseling through the Gladney Center for Adoption, during a very sensitive time and process in that mother’s life.
Encouraging Awareness About Children in Foster Care
At any given count, there are more than 100,000 children and teenagers in foster care and are waiting for a permanent home with a loving and secure family. Children go into foster care and it is not their fault. Children abused, neglected, or abandoned are separated from their birth parents for their safety. And while many of the children in foster care are eventually able to reunite with their birth parents, many more become eligible for adoption from foster care.
Birth-related relatives may have the option to adopt children from foster care, especially when they have an existing relationship with the child. Additionally, foster parents may seek to adopt foster children as permanent members of their family.
Becoming a Foster Parent in Texas
In Texas, the foster parent program is a good starting point for people who want to adopt a child. There are many benefits to becoming a foster parent. Especially if you have not had children before, becoming a foster parent can help you learn more about your parenting style and how to adapt to life with children before you make a forever commitment to adopt a child.
The first step in becoming a foster parent in Texas is to attend an informational meeting where you learn the requirements of being a foster or adoptive parent. Generally, you must be at least 21 years old, financially stable, and a responsible mature adult.
Training for Foster Parents in Texas
After the informational meeting and application process with DFPS, if you are selected to proceed in the process you will be invited to meet with DFPS staff to talk about becoming a foster parent. Next, you will attend a training course through DFPS as well as completing the Parent Resource Information Development Education (PRIDE) course. Applicants to become foster parents must also complete any additional training required by the state, including universal precautions training, psychotropic medication training, and First Aid and CPR training.
A final step in becoming a foster parent is the family home study, where a caseworker from DFPS will visit with you in your home and discuss personal histories and family interests. The caseworker will be interested in learning your existing childcare experience and how you are best able to meet the needs of a child. The caseworker prepares a report based on their recommendations after the family home study and may suggest a child who may be the best match for your family.
Encouraging Others to Adopt Children from Foster Care
Every family has its own story to tell about why they decided to become foster parents and adopt children. Some become foster and adoptive parents because of a relative or family friend. Some couples have difficulty having children but have so much love and care to give a child in need, and they become foster parents and later adopt.
If you know someone who has enough love and room in their heart and family to become adopt children from foster care, you can help a boy or girl become another family’s new son or daughter.
Sometimes life gives us situations and opportunities for which we did not prepare. Life can be happy and life can be sad, but one thing is certain, life continues and there are always surprises. Encouraging others to adopt children from foster care is significant because it might be something new to someone.
With Questions About Foster Care and Adoption in Tarrant County or Denton County, Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583
Ex Parte Communications: Do Not Email the Judge
Preserving Fairness in Divorce Courts and Cases: Ex Parte Communications
The Texas Rules of Civil Procedure and local court rules provide the format for information and evidence to be used in divorce and child custody cases. Lawyers use formal notice and pleading documents like requests for the Court to provide relief to a party in the case. Neither a party nor their divorce lawyer may communicate directly with the judge in their case. See an example of a notice about ex parte communications on the 325th District Court website in Tarrant County.
Any decision made by a judge in a divorce and child support Court must be based on properly submitted evidence and legal arguments applying the facts and evidence to the law.
Justice requires fair and impartial Judges and Courts. To avoid the appearance of impropriety in any of the Judge’s activities, they do not communicate about the case without all the parties present, who are entitled to notice, or their attorneys when they are represented by counsel.
Southlake Family Law Attorney Leslie Barrows: “Do not attempt to call or email the judge in your case. You could be creating a serious situation that could have an impact. If you need an attorney to represent you in your divorce or custody case, call us at our office in Southlake.”
What Is an Ex Parte Communication?
Communications with the Court means communications with the Judge. That communication could be spoken or written; imagine a party in the case who tries to talk to the Judge before or after the case is called, or sees them outside the Courtroom, with a question or comment about the case. Now that Judges have emails, and many are available on their websites, they do what they can to ensure the parties do not email them about their case and talk to their attorney with any questions or concerns.
Communications with a member of the jury. While jury trials are not quite common in Texas divorce and family law cases, they are available in certain situations. Communicating with members of the jury outside of the official court process is also prohibited.
Do Not Email Judges About Cases: Ex Parte Notices on Websites
A party in a divorce or child custody case has no reason to directly communicate about the facts of a case with a judge, and neither does their attorney, outside the formal communication procedure. So why then, do Courts list the contact information and email for the Judge on the Court’s website? There may be acceptable times that someone contacts the Judge directly outside of the formal process. For example, the attorney’s office might call the judge’s clerk directly to let them know the attorney is delayed in another Court or is on their way to a hearing. Another example might be the family law attorney’s office sent a copy of correspondence about something filed in the case, such as a required response with a deadline.
Otherwise, parties in a divorce, child custody, and all family lawsuit should never directly email the judge about a case. Imagine a party emailing their judge that the other party was late to visitation exchange or did not give the children their medication during their overnight. In many of these situations, the Judge is put in an awkward position, especially in cases where the judge is deciding issues in the case that could be challenged later.
Why Are Ex Parte Communications Prohibited?
Ex parte communications are prohibited because there is no way to resolve the issue of bias and influence in the case. The rules of civil procedure are formal and specific for a good reason. The only information a judge should have about a case should come from filed legal documents in the case and from evidence, testimony, and attorneys appearing in Court on that specific case.
Consequences for Violating Ex Parte Communication Rules
Inappropriate and unauthorized communication with a judge can lead to serious consequences. For example, if one of the parties directly contacts the judge with substantive and material information about the case, the other party or their attorney might make a motion for sanctions and other relief in the case. The Court, when facing an ex parte communication, must make sure that the trial record is clear that communication happened and what was done in the interest of fairness to make sure that the judge or jury was not influenced in the matter.
Appeals of Court decisions can be appropriate if one party believes they can prove that the judge or jury was involved in an ex parte communication. Especially in high conflict cases involving children, the rules of civil procedure and judicial conduct must be enforced.
Judges are bound by the Texas Code of Judicial Conduct and shall not permit or consider any ex parte communications or other communications made to the judge outside the presence of the parties between whom the case is at issue. Depending on the situation, a Judge who receives information must take appropriate actions to make sure that there is no appearance of impartiality, including recusal from the case.
For More on Ex Parte Communications in Divorce and Child Custody, Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake, Texas (817) 481-1583
Divorce, Joint Debts, and Student Loans in Texas
Divorce with Joint Debts During Marriage in Texas
Texas divorce and family laws treat joint debts during marriage like other property which is either community property or separate property. Community property consists of the property, other than separate property that is acquired by either spouse during the marriage. When spouses divorce, the property owned by each is presumed to be community property. With community assets and debts, the spouse asserting an asset or debt is separate, can make that argument in a divorce with joint debts.
An argument that joint debts are separate and not to be shared between the spouses can be a bargaining tool in the property division process. After negotiating and settling issues of community versus separate property, the spouses and their attorneys can propose a fair settlement agreement stating who gets which assets and debts.
Note that Texas law states that community property is to be divided based on what the Court deems “just and right,” meaning fair and equitable. In some divorces a 50/50 division is appropriate. Depending on facts, circumstances, and allegations, one spouse might be awarded a greater share of the property.
Related Barrows Firm Article – Dividing up Businesses During Divorce and COVID-19
Options for Dividing Joint Marital Debt in a Texas Divorce
When you get divorced who gets stuck with the debt? Southlake Family Lawyer, Leslie Barrows frequently tells clients that every divorce is unique and requires the right strategy to achieve their goals. At the end of the day, there are two options, negotiate an agreement stating which spouse assumes which debts or let the Court decide. When Texas Judges must divide debts, they tend to give the debt to the spouse who receives the asset tied to that debt. For example, if the husband is awarded the car he is driving, he may be ordered to assume the debt and payments for the car.
Divorce Pro Tip – use a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA) for Complex Financial Issues
At the beginning of a divorce in Texas, the spouses are ordered, or the attorneys make agreements not to sell, disturb, or give away property. But once the divorce is underway the parties can make agreements to sell certain community property assets to pay off debts incurred by both spouses during the marriage.
Another option to dividing joint marital debt is to give one spouse a larger share of community assets in exchange for paying off a larger share of community debt. Depending on the type of asset or debt, it can be difficult to divide things 50/50, and your divorce and property division attorney can work to equalize asset and debt division in a way that makes the most sense. For example, a luxury home that might be difficult to sell might affect negotiations.
Student Loan Debt and Community Property
The issue of student loan debt comes up frequently in divorce. Attorney Leslie Barrows reminds people, do not pay off your spouse’s student loans with your credit card in your name, and think your spouse must reimburse you. The issue with student loan debt is when the student debt was incurred. Generally, spouses with student loan debt from before the marriage will be responsible for their debt. Meanwhile, both spouses can be liable to pay student debt incurred during the marriage.
Despite general rules, every divorce and student loan debt issues are different. Spouses can make the argument that the student loan benefitted the marriage and should be treated uniquely. Another issue can be student loan refinancing and co-mingling of property. If for example, the spouses refinance the marital home and pay off student loan debt, there can be conflict in the divorce process.
Related Issue – Should You Pay Off Student Loans or Invest
Furthermore, credit card debt can be challenging in a divorce. If both spouses are on the credit card, there is an extra word of caution in divorce. The credit card company does not care which spouse was ordered to pay the credit card balance and if left unpaid, both spouses can suffer damage to their credit rating. If this is the case, you might ask the Court to order that joint credit card debt is paid off during the divorce, not afterward when it takes more work to enforce the Court’s orders.
Exceptions to Joint Debt Division in Texas
Before marrying, couples with significant asset and debt questions can resolve concerns with a prenuptial agreement. If the couple so chooses, they can agree in a prenup that any student loan debt incurred before or during the marriage be the separate debt of each spouse. Even if Texas law would favor any of the positions in a prenup, some people appreciate the added security of knowing what will happen in the event the marriage ends in divorce.
If during the marriage the spouses decide they want similar assurances of a prenuptial agreement, they can go to their local family lawyer and get a postnuptial agreement. In some marriages, a postnuptial agreement can save a marriage when the prospect of divorce causes great anxiety.
When facing questions about marriage, divorce, assets, and joint debt liability, get the right information to help make the right decisions. Contact an experienced divorce and property division attorney and learn where you may stand based on your situation.
Leslie Barrows is a Southlake Texas Divorce and Property Division Lawyer and Can Help You Learn Your Legal Rights and Options for Joint Debts During Marriage in Texas at the Barrows Firm (817) 481-1583
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Alcohol Monitoring in Child Custody Cases
Alcohol Monitoring is an Issue in Child Custody Cases, Especially During COVID-19
When alcohol use turns into abuse or alcoholism, the best interests of the child are an important focus in a divorce or family law case with child custody issues. Too often when one or both parent has an alcohol problem, the children take on adult tasks and are doing things around the house that their parent is not because of their drinking. Many children should not have to be making their meals on their own and taking on adult tasks because of drinking. Remote alcohol monitoring with Soberlink can help the Court determine exactly what is going on at home and during visitation time.
The Barrows Firm in Southlake Can Help You with Alcohol Monitoring
Psychology Today Article: Substance Abuse in Divorce Is as Complicated as You’d Think
COVID-19 disrupts many of our lives as we all adapt to changing conditions. When you are in a divorce or already co-parenting, the stress of 2020 can lead to increased drinking that becomes a problem. Especially with so many people working from home and not going to the usual meetings and events, you can imagine how increased drinking can happen and lead to a problem that needs addressing.
In a divorce case, alcohol use and abuse may be issues in determining custody and possession schedules. After a divorce, visitation with the other parent could be a problem if they are drinking excessively, especially around the children. When these problems arise it might be appropriate to ask the Court to enforce or modify the terms of a parenting arrangement, including remote alcohol testing.
See our related article, Court-Ordered Alcohol Testing: Soberlink and EtG Testing
Why Alcohol Monitoring is Important: Key Facts from Soberlink
Divorce and child custody attorneys and judges are used to addressing alcohol abuse and alcoholism. Not everyone who drinks has a problem with alcohol, but for some people, use can turn into abuse. When sobriety is an issue in a Texas divorce or child custody case, Southlake Family Law Attorney Leslie Barrows often asks the Court to order the other parent to be monitored by Soberlink.
Soberlink is a company that uses technology and equipment that works with people’s mobile devices to remotely test and report their sobriety. Alcohol monitoring is used to protect the emotional and physical safety of children until the parent with abuse issues regains control.
Here are some facts from a Soberlink video about alcoholism and alcohol monitoring in divorce and child custody cases:
- Approximately 15.1 million adults in the U.S. have some type of alcohol use disorder.
- Reports indicate 9.8 million men have an alcohol use disorder, which is 1 in every 5 men.
- Reports indicate 5.3 million women have an alcohol use disorder, which is 1 in every 12 women.
- Fewer than 10 percent of men and women seek alcoholism treatment.
- Around 10 percent of children live with a parent with alcohol problems.
- Divorce rates are higher when one parent is a problem drinker.
- Approximately 55 thousand divorces a year involve a parent with alcohol abuse.
- More people abuse alcohol than other drugs combined.
Options for Alcohol Monitoring in Child Custody Cases
If one parent has a reason to believe the other is or had been drinking, they may refuse to let the child go with the other parent. This situation leads to accusations that require witnesses to get involved and without alcohol testing, it is difficult to determine the truth.
To determine a parent’s alcohol use and to prevent a child from being exposed to alcohol abuse, the Court can order alcohol monitoring. The Soberlink device and technology makes it easy for everyone involved. Whether a parent is ordered to blow into the remote device at set times, or on-demand, can be determined based on a case by case basis. If the use of alcohol monitoring shows that the parent is not abusing alcohol, that is a good thing and we do not prevent that parent from having meaningful parenting time with their child.
Proof of Sobriety with Soberlink Alcohol Monitoring Solutions
To prove a parent is not using alcohol, the Soberlink alcohol monitoring system can be a lifesaver. The parent being accused of alcohol abuse might be the one who wants a remote alcohol testing solution to prove their sobriety to the other parent and the Court. Test results can be sent to the Judge, the attorneys, and whomever else is ordered to receive scheduled or random alcohol testing information.
Soberlink offers a video explaining different types of alcohol monitoring and the advantages of the Soberlink remote alcohol monitoring compared to traditional methods. They note that Soberlink has been used in courts since 2011 and its technology includes not only real-time testing results but also facial recognition technology. The Soberlink system verifies the person taking the test is the one ordered to submit to remote alcohol monitoring.
For Alcohol Monitoring in Divorce and Child Custody Cases, Call The Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583
COVID-19 Challenges with Kids, Possession Schedules, and School Schedules
Kids, Possession Schedules, School Schedules, and COVID-19 Challenges
September is here and there are yellow busses on the road, some more full than others as divorced parents face common challenges with COVID-19 impacting their kids and possession schedules. Some of our children are back at school for in-person learning while others are at home doing virtual school online. And while this might work at first, anything can happen to screw it all up. If that is your concern or reality, the Barrows Firm divorce and family law attorneys are here to help you figure out a solution that works in the short term because it is going to be a while before the backlogged courts have in-person hearings and trials on possession schedules, school schedules, and visitation swaps.
Attorney Leslie Barrows and Amanda Roark are helping North Texas families in Tarrant and Denton Counties who call the Barrows Firm for help with COVID-19 challenges when work, school, and possession schedules conflict. Yes, you may need to have an enforcement or modification hearing or trial but mediation could be a much better course of action in the meantime.
Our recent article has more useful information – Back to School Schedules: The 2021 Academic Year and Virtual School
The Purpose and Intent of a Possession Schedule
When parents get a divorce in Texas, it is common to use a standard possession schedule to determine when the children will be with which parent. The term possession and access are used in the Texas Family Code regarding issues of visitation when the non-primary parent has quality parenting time with their children. A possession schedule includes references to holidays and school calendars. Pick up and drop off times are set around school schedules.
The possession schedule is intended to be relied upon by the parents as the final word on where and with whom the child should be at any given point in time. Wrapping a possession schedule around school calendars makes sense for parents and children. However, if you and the other parent have an agreement to do something other than what is stated in your possession schedule, that is allowable. If you and the co-parent can get along well enough to trade time on your own, it is okay to adjust, as necessary.
Interesting Options: Texas Virtual School Network
Psychology Today: Will Distance Learning Produce a Coronavirus Slump?
School Schedules During COVID-19 for Virtual/Online or In-Person Learning
Most Independent School Districts in Texas let parents know of deadlines to decide whether their child will attend school virtually in an online environment from home, or in-person at school. So far, parents have made their choices and kids are adjusting to their new school year despite COVID-19 challenges and fears of another wave of spreading Coronavirus among students. When schools shut down and extended Spring Break earlier this year, the concern was the number of students who could contract COVID-19 and transmit it to families, including elderly family members and those with already compromised immune systems.
Most of the ISDs like Carroll ISD, where Leslie Barrows is an active parent, have a school schedule for the virtual students that nearly mirrors the in-person instruction at school. So, at the same time, both sets of students have similar learning schedules. If this applies to your family, your possession schedule and visitation exchange should not be affected but for the location of the visitation exchange.
Should You Follow the Same Possession Schedule if Things Change or Schedules Conflict?
When people call the Barrows Firm and talk to attorneys Leslie Barrows and Amanda Roark the questions about custody, possession, and school schedules are unique to COVID-19 because none of the attorneys, judges, or school administrators can predict exactly what is going to happen with the Coronavirus and potential spread among students. People are divided over their thoughts about risks and safety, making this a bigger challenge for everyone involved.
Can you adjust your schedules as parents to accommodate your children? For some parents, the answer is, “I don’t know.” Some parents are working full time from home and others are outside the home at an office or in a job where they travel for work. If you can work with the other parent on adjusting possession time because school schedules are a challenge during COVID-19, you may earn good brownie points that come in handy later when you might need a favor.
Compromise Now? Court Hearings and Jury Trials May Not Be Available Until January
Before the COVID-19 outbreak and shutdowns, if your former spouse refused to comply with Court orders and possession schedules, you could file an enforcement action, or modification if needed, and get into Court to ask for emergency relief and to set a hearing or trial. Now that we are in the third quarter of 2020, that previous course of action is no longer an option.
The majority of Texas family courts have postponed in-person hearings in family law cases until next year unless the matter is a true emergency and it is essential to the best interest of a child to see a judge right away. If you are being denied possession time and your ex is being difficult with visitation exchanges, now might be the time to take good notes and hold onto your hat until Coronavirus passes and you can get into Court to address the situation. So, if you can find a way to compromise now, do that. If you can use mediation to settle post-decree kid and school issues, try it. A jury trial on contested issues may become available once the dust settles and court calendars adjust to something closer to normal.
Now is the Time to Get a Handle on School Schedules, Possession Schedules, and COVID-19 Problems and the Barrows Firm in Southlake Has Your Back! (817) 481-1583
Back to School Schedules: The 2021 Academic Year and Virtual School
In-Person or Virtual Learning, Back to School Schedules Impacting Co-Parenting
Southlake family law attorney Leslie Barrows is a boy mom of three and understands the concerns of parents about school schedules and possession schedules during COVID-19. Many independent school districts are offering parents the opportunity for their children attending school in-person or at home doing virtual school. If there was ever a time for patience, understanding, and flexibility, now is that time. Even the most acrimonious co-parenting situations might need to allow for compromise and agreements as conditions continue to change during the COVID-19 outbreak. Southlake family law attorney Leslie Barrows can help you and your family figure out back to school schedules as it may affect co-parenting and custody arrangements. Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583.
See our related article: Emergency Order on Possession and Access Schedules During COVID-19 Pandemic
Kids in the Classroom and at Home for Virtual School
Parents changing their minds about in-person versus virtual school options is a concern among many. For example, Southlake parents with children enrolled in Carroll ISD were asked to decide whether they want their kids to be at school for in-person instruction by August 10, which was two weeks before the start of classes this coming Monday, August 24th. Parents who changed their minds were asked to notify their child’s campus principal in writing. Carroll ISD offers its Dragon Virtual Academy for the first nine-week grading period.
Depending on the ages of your children, their virtual instruction process if different. The schedules for younger students may be easier to adjust to schedules than the older children in blocks from 8 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. where the virtual students will be on a regimented instruction schedule just like the in-person students.
HealthyChildren.org article: Return to School During COVID-19
Possession Schedules Based on School Schedules
Most of the in-person learning and virtual learning occur on the same clock schedules. The students will be structured in the virtual setting at home, much like they were at school for in-person instruction. Instead of mom or dad driving the kids to school, they may not need to leave the house. Even though your possession schedule is based on school calendars, clock times, and schedules, you can adjust to exchanging visitation around the school schedules like normal, even though the children might not be leaving the house.
Ever considered 50/50? Read our article: Divorcing with Children 103 – Equal Access Possession Schedules
Is the School Schedule the Same as Parenting Time?
It is reasonable to anticipate some parents objecting to the other parent having more parenting time with the children when they are at home with the kids during their virtual schooling when they would otherwise be at school with teachers and fellow students in-person. Most parents who have their children at home with them doing virtual learning might joke at the idea of the other parent being jealous of what seems like more time with the children and gladly offer the other parent oversee virtual learning. The technology used by many school districts requires that virtual students at home are active on their computers and working diligently. So even though those children might be at home with the other parent, they are busy and occupied with their classes.
Edutopia article: Why Are Some Kids Thriving During Remote Learning?
Sending Your Children to the Other Parent for Virtual Learning
People with busy careers might not be able to stay at home with their children who are doing virtual learning. This might be a reason to send the kids back for in-person learning instead. But what happens if the other parent, who is a joint managing conservator, objects to in-person learning due to COVID-19 risks? What if the primary parent works in a profession that requires them to be gone from the house every day and the other parent works from home, at least during COVID-19?
Consider agreeing with your co-parent, that during COVID-19 impacting schooling, that the children go to the other parent’s house during the school day, arriving and leaving just as if they were at the school buildings with their teachers and fellow students. Remember, you and the other parent can agree to do whatever you both want with school schedules and possession, falling back on your Court Ordered parenting plan and possession schedule when necessary.
Adjustments to Academic Calendar
Adjusting to scheduling conflicts and challenges requires patience during COVID-19. As kids start going back to school there may be new cases reported causing unknown consequences. Some parents might start sending their children back for in-person instruction and then quickly decide they want to pull them back out of school for virtual learning instead.
Modifications to Possession Schedules to Match School Schedules
Modifying possession schedules is appropriate for parents who cannot co-parent well and need to stick to their Court Order. If school schedules during COVID-19 are a problem, and you have children of varying ages and needs, where some are attending in-person school and others are attending virtual school, you might benefit from a modification. But before you run to Court, remember that a modification case is a new lawsuit with service of process and all the procedural formalities you may recall from your original divorce and custody case. By the time you get to see a judge, during these times, your issues requiring a custody modification could be resolved. Remember that in different counties, there are serious backlogs of cases and parties are only appearing virtually. Alternatively, a temporary agreement between you and the other parent can resolve conflicts with the 2021 school schedules.
Southlake Family Law Attorney Leslie Barrows Can Help You with Agreements, Negotiations, and if Necessary, Modifications to Possession Schedules when School Schedules and COVID-19 Disrupt Your Plans. Call the Barrows Firm at (817) 481-1583.
Dividing up Businesses During Divorce and COVID-19
Divorce and Property Division During COVID-19
Divorce is challenging and it is a significant life event, especially when there are businesses involved and property division issues. Even in great economic conditions, there are disagreements over who owns what, what it is worth, and how it should best be distributed among the parties in the divorce.
Texas is a community property state and the Texas Family Code divides property acquired during the marriage based on what is “right and just,” which can be 50/50 or can be otherwise depending on the facts and circumstances. Separate property that remains legally classified and identifiable as separate, is not considered for division in the divorce. The more businesses and properties that are involved, the more opportunities there are for unresolved conflict. Especially in high-stakes divorce with business interests, it is important to use an experienced divorce attorney and law firm that knows how to create a winning strategy to meet your family’s needs.
Attorney Leslie Barrows and her team at the Barrows Firm in Southlake will ask all the right questions in your initial consultation to advise how to proceed with divorce during the COVID-19 Coronavirus outbreak. Call (817) 481-1583.
Dividing Business Assets in a Divorce
Are there any existing agreements that direct what happens to property and businesses in a divorce? A premarital agreement, for example, can specify that a business asset remains the separate value of one of the spouses. One of the parties in the divorce may also have independent business contracts with other individuals and organizations that can play a role in the divorce process of property and business asset division.
Determining who has the legal right to what assets and business interests is one step. Another issue is how much money the assets and property are worth. By agreement between the parties or by order of the Court, the marital property and any businesses will be distributed between the spouses. One might accept a larger share of an investment account and waive ownership in a business, for example. There are many options and every divorce is different.
Learn more, see our article, Prenups, and Premarital Agreements in Texas.
Valuation of Property and Business Assets
Any property that is subject to division in a divorce must be valued. This means that marital homes, vacation properties, investment properties, and shares in a business and business assets must be valued. A property and business valuation expert can offer their report and testimony if necessary when the parties do not otherwise agree to property amounts.
The discovery process in a divorce involves the exchange of information between the divorcing spouses. The documents and information help the attorneys and their clients understand where the money and property are and who else may be involved with ownership interests.
When assets and property are identified, the valuation process can take place. The more complicated the asset or business interest is, the more work it can take to get a proper valuation. If there is a conflict between the parties in the valuation process, it might be necessary to go to court when an agreement on fair market values cannot be reached.
Forbes: Everything You Need to Know About Protecting Your Business in A Divorce.
Getting into Court on Property and Business Division in COVID-19 Divorce
Texas courts are operating on different plans during the COVID-19 Coronavirus outbreak. What is happening in Tarrant County district courts may be different from Denton County, for example. In many courts, only essential matters are being conducted in open courts and most hearings and trials are being done remotely using Zoom.
If there are disputes over property and business values, contracts, and interests, your attorney may need to have a hearing with the Judge. So many families are waiting for hearings that have been continued and postponed due to the stress on the Courts and already busy dockets. Your divorce attorney can talk to you about various options in your divorce during COVID-19. It might make sense to handle some parts of the divorce now, and others later.
Please Also See our Article: Estate Planning and Updates During COVID19 Coronavirus.
How the COVID-19 Outbreak Affects Property Division
Uncertainty is a constant right now and changes happen quickly during COVID-19. Determining the fair market value of property and business interests is challenging during a pandemic. It is difficult, even for the experts, to forecast the value of property and business assets during 2020. Applying these challenges to a divorce with business interests, there could be cash flow issues, assets might need to be sold to sustain operations, and third-party contract obligations could cause temporary difficulties.
Conflict between spouses in a divorce can be resolved by agreement or by Order of the Court. During the COVID-19 outbreak, one party to the divorce might prefer to postpone certain elements of property and business division. The other party, however, may wish to proceed with the case despite various challenges. With uncertainty, postponing property and business division could work against the party seeking to wait for fair market values to return to normal and lose more money for both parties.
Southlake Family Law Attorney Leslie Barrows Advises and Represents Families with Complex Property and Business Division Issues in Texas Divorces. Call the Barrows Firm (817) 481-1583.
Estate Planning and Updates During COVID19 Coronavirus
Estate Planning for Everyone During COVID19 Coronavirus
Do you have a will, power of attorney, and healthcare directives? At any given moment one of us or a family member could fall ill to the Coronavirus making estate planning important. While our elderly population is at particular risk, people of all ages have contracted the virus and some require hospitalization, and some do not make it through COVID19.
But why do so many of us wait until confronted by a life-threatening pandemic to get our will and estate planning documents created or updated? Attorney Leslie Barrows can help you prepare or update your estate planning documents to give you and your family peace of mind. Call the Barrows Firm today and learn how easy it is to be prepared when times get tough.
For Estate Planning and Updates Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583
Meeting Your Attorney with Social Distancing and Virtual Contact During COVID19 Coronavirus
The Barrows Firm attorneys and staff understand health and safety concerns and precautions. Estate planning documents and can be prepared and sent electronically for review and witnessed signatures. There are ways to use technology to bring the necessary people together to accomplish estate planning goals while maintaining social distance and COVID19 Coronavirus prevention measures.
Make Sure to Update Your Estate Planning Documents
Updates to estate planning documents help you and your family make sure that your wishes are carried out if you are incapacitated, physically unavailable, or deceased. The birth of new children, the addition of family members by marriage, as well as acquired assets and properties need protection. Estate planning documents, directives, powers of attorneys, HIPPA, and trust documents provide protection. Without intentions and directives in proper written form, your decision making can become the province of another person you did not select.
HIPPA Authorization for Patient Records and Documents
HIPPA stands for the Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act. HIPPA regulations protect your personal healthcare information and records and control how those records can be kept and shared in healthcare treatment and communication about patient care. A HIPPA release authorization for records is part of estate planning. It allows you to appoint people with the authority to make decisions for you about the release of medical records. The HIPPA authorization allows your designated spouse, child, or other family member or person to talk to your doctors and nurses if you are hospitalized and unable to make your own care decisions.
Advance Health Care Directives During COVID19 Coronavirus
An Advanced Health Care Directive (“AHCD”) document is an essential part of estate planning regarding the authority of others to make health care decisions on our behalf. Separate of HIPPA issues, decisions on how to proceed with health care can be made by the person you appoint with an advanced health care directive document.
Power of Attorney and Durable Power of Attorney Documents in Your Estate Plan
Decision making can be appointed for times you may be medically incapable or unavailable to make decisions. These appointments can apply to decisions about money, property, and other legal obligations. When you prepare and update your estate planning documents during COVID19 Coronavirus, you can make sure that
Wills with a Special Needs Trust If you Have Minor Children
Wills and special needs trusts are used when a minor child has special needs including public benefits including Social Security Insurance (SSI) and Medicaid, for example. The goal of parents with special needs children is to make their children’s lives as enriched as possible by taking advantage of appropriate and available government programs designed for their care, and administered through a special needs trust.
The benefit of a special needs trust involves the money for it, in the estate of the parents, is not legally considered an asset in the event of the death of those parents. How much income and principal is allocated for the right purposes can be written in the special needs trust.
Trusts in Estate Planning to Protect Beneficiaries
A trust document establishes the relationship among the maker of a trust, the money or property that is the body of the trust, and the rights of the beneficiary to the body of the trust, and their interest in the money or property that is the body. Simply, a trust protects money or property for the benefit of another. If for example, you are leaving money to a child or grandchild and you want to make sure they do not spend it until they reach a certain age, you can accomplish that goal through a trust.
A trustee of the trust for another could be a family member or a professional you trust with the fiduciary duties of a trustee, keep true to the intent of the trust maker or settlor, and the benefit of the named trustee. Trusts are commonly used to hold property as well, where the name of the beneficiary is kept private from the knowledge of the general public.
For All Your Estate Planning Needs and Updates Curing COVID19 Coronavirus, Call the Barrows Firm for Estate Planning, Probate, and Family Law Advice and Counsel at (817) 481-1583
CPS Investigations During a Divorce
Steps to Take if There is a CPS Investigation During a Divorce
Imagine being contacted by a Child Protective Services (“CPS”) caseworker intending to talk to your family in connection with a CPS investigation during a divorce. You are shocked and do not know what to do. Should you talk to them because not talking to them might make you look guilty or something? Are you afraid that if you insist on your lawyer being present it looks like you are covering something up?
Southlake divorce attorney Leslie Barrows is the principal attorney at the Barrows Firm and people frequently ask her questions about CPS investigations during divorces. Attorney Barrows often explains to people is that the CPS caseworker is simply doing their job and it is part of a process when they receive a communication from someone who makes a CPS inquiry or allegation of abuse or neglect of a child.
In this short article, there are a few tips to understanding how CPS cases work and steps to take if there is a CPS investigation during or after your divorce. If you need help now or have questions, don’t wait to call the Barrows Firm in Southlake and talk to Leslie Barrows or Amanda Roark.
What Does CPS Do When They are Investigating During a Divorce?
CPS in Texas is a part of the Texas Department of Family and Protective Services (DFPS). The role of CPS is to keep children safe from abuse or neglect. If someone makes a phone call to the CPS hotline, then CPS must follow up on that report to find out if something is going wrong.
Initial contact with CPS does not mean there will necessarily be a formal investigation into abuse and or neglect. They might let you know that a report was made against you. If CPS determines an investigation is necessary because there is proof or a significant threat of harm to your child, they must start their investigation within 72 hours of the phone call reporting an incident.
Texas Department of Family and Protective Services Website: When and How to Report Child Abuse
Did You Know Many People Including Teachers are Mandatory Reporters?
The mandatory reporting laws require teachers, doctors, nurses, clergy, and other trusted people that work with and around children, to report suspicions of abuse or neglect to CPS. They can lose their licenses if they fail to report suspected abuse. In many cases, a kid might have been bruised or injured just being a kid, but in other cases, a mandatory reporter stumbles upon something more.
Reports made to CPS are anonymous and you may never know who called them. It could be just about anyone and trying to find out is a waste of time. The most important thing to do is make sure that you manage your stress level and keep your family safe and sound, ideally with the help of an experienced family lawyer who can help you through the process and answer your questions.
Texas Department of Family and Protective Services Website: Learn More About Mandatory Reporters
Knock, Knock, CPS is at Your Door! What Should You Do?
They are not law enforcement. They cannot detain you. You do not have to talk to them. They cannot pull your kid out of your house. They might try to talk to your kid at school.
Step one is to CALL A FAMILY LAWYER (817) 481-1583. You need to know your rights as a parent. Attorney Leslie Barrows has worked in divorce and family law cases with the full focus of her career as an attorney and CPS cases are certainly a part of her wheelhouse.
It will help you prepare for the right time to talk to the CPS caseworker if you take notes about everything that is going on and what was said. Be prepared to be pleasant and honest when answering their questions with or without an attorney present. It may seem like you are playing a game, but when you play it right you are allowing the CPS caseworker to close their investigation.
How Will This Affect the Divorce and Custody Case if There is an Investigation During a Divorce?
If you are seeking to be the primary parent and have sole custody of your children in a divorce, a CPS case on you or your spouse is going to be a big deal to your judge and it is necessary to have an experienced family law attorney representing you. If you are doing a simple divorce without a lawyer, you need to hire one if you want custody of your children.
What is The Family Plan Following a CPS Investigation During a Divorce?
Please do not think that CPS is only in the business of removing children to place them into foster care. If something was going on in your family and something happened to a child, it could be appropriate for CPS to put everyone on a family plan where the parents attend the proper parenting classes, counseling, or whatever is required to show CPS that children are not in any direct danger or at risk of current or future abuse or neglect.
Got Questions? For Information about CPS Investigations During a Divorce Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake (817) 481-1583
Prenups and Premarital Agreements in Texas
What Are Premarital Agreements in Texas?
The Texas Family Code defines a premarital agreement as “an agreement made between prospective spouses in contemplation of marriage and to be effective on marriage.” A prenup as most call it is a formal agreement that states what happens to the property of the parties should the marriage end in divorce.
Prenups tend to be stigmatized in movies where high stakes divorces and premarital agreements are sensationalized. For example, in the 2003 film, Intolerable Cruelty, the “Massey Prenup” is a central part of the story.
You do not need to be rich and famous to have a prenup. Many couples consider a premarital agreement to be an opportunity to talk about how they would handle property division in the event of divorce. It is not that the prenup is made assuming there will be a divorce, but if that were to happen, having a prenup is like having insurance, and you know what you may expect if you need it.
Attorney Leslie Barrows and the family lawyers at the Barrows Firm in Southlake can give you peace of mind when getting married by negotiating a sensible Texas premarital agreement.
Related Article: The Unexpected Upside of Getting a Prenup
Talking to Your Future Spouse About Money and Property when Considering a Prenup.
Preparing information for a prenup may seem quite like the information contained in a divorce lawsuit. In each one of the bullet points below, there are issues to discuss one another’s rights and duties. Consider the subject of family gifts, where the father gives the husband $50,000 as a gift to be used as the down payment of the house. The couple could decide to include in a written premarital agreement to recognize that money as separate property, attributable to husband in the event of divorce. The prenup could be limited to specifically that money and silent as to anything else.
Likewise, anything on the list below could be a separate section of the premarital agreement. Note that the duration a prenup can also state, for example, that upon 10 years of marriage, the premarital agreement naturally terminates. Alternatively, the agreement could last longer, and some provisions simply kick in at the 10-year mark. Because a prenup is a contract between two people, they can add almost whatever they want in the language with the limitation of things only within the Court’s authority, like Child support payments and amounts.
Potential Issues to Address Before Marriage and in a Premarital Agreement in Texas:
- Premarital Assets and Debts
- Marital Property
- Regular Income Management
- Credit Cards and Debts
- Working and Earning Income
- Spousal Maintenance
- Considerable Gifts from Family
- Taxes and Filing Decisions
- Higher Education?
- Business Ownership
- Fault as a Basis of Divorce
- Death or Disability
What Happens When You Divorce and Don’t Have a Prenup in Texas?
If you do have a prenup, you can determine who gets what assets and property so long as your agreement satisfies the requirements in the Texas Family Code for premarital agreements. If you do not have a prenup, your separate property from before the marriage remains separate if you can prove it is separate property. Meanwhile, everything else you and your spouse acquired during the marriage is community property which the court divides between spouses based on what is “just and right.”
Related Article: “Just and Right” Community Property Division in Texas Divorce.
Are Prenups, also called Premarital Agreements Enforceable in Texas?
Different states have different laws about the process and formalities required to have a valid and enforceable premarital agreement in Texas. The Texas Family Code states that a premarital agreement must be in writing and signed by both parties. The content of the agreement may include the rights and obligations of individuals concerning assets and property. Additionally, spousal support may also be modified or eliminated by agreement of the parties in a prenup. Wills and trusts can also be addressed in premarital agreements as well as life insurance policies. Overall, matters concerning rights and obligations may be the content of a Texas prenup.
Will My Out of State Prenup be Valid and Enforceable in Texas Courts?
With so many families moving from one state to another for work and other reasons, a couple considering divorce might have a premarital agreement that was negotiated and signed in another state with different requirements for the process and formalities necessary for a valid and enforceable prenup.
The general rule is that a valid and enforceable agreement from another state will be enforceable here in Texas, so long as the written agreement satisfied the legal requirements for validity in the state in which the agreement was originally written. That said, any elements of a premarital agreement that would violate Texas law and the Texas Family Code might fail. It is also possible that part of an out of state premarital agreement would be enforced. The court could also declare an out of state prenup to be invalid in Texas but use the weight of the parties’ intent about their prenup when making property division decisions here in a Texas Court.
What Documents Are Needed for a Texas Prenup?
Generally, documents are used as evidence of ownership of assets and property. Proper documentation incorporated into a premarital agreement makes it easy to prove the intent of the parties when the premarital agreement was made. The more one keeps accurate records, the better one can prove what their claims in the event they are in court seeking to prove up the validity and enforceability of a premarital agreement in Texas.
Need a Prenup? Call the Barrows Firm for Premarital Agreements in Texas (817) 481-1583
Father’s Day and Father’s Rights
Celebrate Father’s Day and Father’s Rights Sunday June 21st
This coming Sunday the 21st of June is Father’s Day and it is a great time to appreciate father’s rights and their important roles in raising their sons and daughters. Why do we wait for one day a year to appreciate fathers when they are important every day? The Barrows Firm works with fathers and mothers who get a divorce and need to set child custody and possession schedules. Southlake divorce attorney Leslie Barrows, founder of the firm, sees all kinds of parenting situations that foster the growth of parent and child relationships. She knows that even when families use a more traditional co-parenting model, there are creative co-parenting options different families can use to make sure their sons and daughters get quality time with their fathers.
Life has been challenging this year and still many families are affected by COVID-19 Coronavirus, putting a strain on many families whose lives and routines have been disrupted. This Father’s Day might include some different plans from what dads and their kiddos normally do, but that should not take away from the importance of celebrating a great Father’s Day because he is their daddy.
Psychology Today: The Importance of Fathers
What are Father’s Rights?
Father’s rights mean the general rights and duties that apply to a father, including his right to parenting time with his children. Father’s rights may also be used as a reference to a father’s right to be notified of any hearing or action about his children, including adoption hearings where in cases a father’s parental rights may be terminated. In an employment context, the term Father’s rights involve the father’s right to time from work to raise a child.
At the Barrows Firm, our client could be the mother or the father. That said, we appreciate the importance of both parents in the growth and development of their sons and daughters. When we talk about Father’s rights in divorce and child custody, we represent our clients to establish the parental rights and duties of each parent. Operating within the Texas Family Code and the local rules of district courts, we negotiate and sometimes need to litigate parenting and children’s issues including Father’s rights.
Why are Father’s Rights Essential to Raising Children?
Father’s rights are important to the emotional development of his sons and daughters. Boys and girls need their fathers in their life and development. Children naturally want to make their fathers proud of them and that is important growth and strength as children grow. Cognitive, emotional, and social development are frequently tied to the roles of fathers in the lives of their children and studies support the importance of affectionate and supportive fathers.
Psychology Today: What’s So Special About Dads
Fathers and Sons
Sons grow up seeking the approval of their fathers, creating themselves in their father’s image. Dads show their boys how to act and how to conduct themselves in the world. Where a father is loving and supporting to his sons, they will grow up similar. Likewise, boys will likely take on other traits of their fathers and their personality types.
When a boy’s father is not actively present in their lives, the son may look up to other male figures in their lives to model themselves after, learning how to make their way in the world. When parents divorce, father’s rights are an important in determining custody and possession time. Fathers and their sons share relationship bonds necessary to their ongoing development. Even if the father is not the primary parent, it is important for the co-parents to make sure that sons get as much quality with their dads, not only on birthdays and Father’s Day, but every available day.
Fathers and Daughters
Fathers are a sense of security and emotional support. Daughters watch their fathers and learn from how they treat others. Girls who grow up with fathers who are kind, loving, and gentile, seem to seek out their own relationships with similar types of men when they grow older. Similarly, a strong leader-type of a father often leads young girls to grow up and seek our similar men.
Daughters can have many great male role models in their lives, but it all starts with their fathers. Divorce and new living situations are challenging for daughters who may not have their dads with them every day. Even if things go wrong in a marriage, the relationships among daddies and daughters are always building and growing.
Revising the Rights and Duties of Fathers as Time Passes and Sons and Daughters Grow Up
When parents divorce or have a suit affecting a parent-child relationship, the parties and the courts ideally work together to create the best custody and parenting plan, in the best interests of the children. Even when a parent, maybe a father, does not feel like he got his way with parenting time, he should know that things change as the children grow older. It may seem like eternities of time dads may are missing when the mother is named the primary parent. As sons and daughters grow up, they need their fathers at key points in their life when their grounding memories are made. Fathers have opportunities to play an active role in their children’s lives, every day, even if they are not the primary parent out of the gate.
Father’s rights include revisiting custody and parenting as the children grow up. The rights and duties of both parents are subject to enforcement and modification cases when necessary. A substantial change in circumstances may warrant custody or possession modification and certainly a father can be appointed the primary parent and the mother could have reasonable periods of possession.
No matter what the outcome of a divorce or custody case, we all know that our modern society is one of connectivity and whatever your family’s situation may be, fathers should be in as much contact and communication with their sons and daughters as is allowed and reasonable. The father who checks in with his kids all the time, and shows them strength, love, and support, is a father who is raising good kids.
To Talk About Father’s Rights, Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583. Leslie, Amanda, and Everyone at the Barrows Firm Wishes You All Celebrate Father’s Rights and Father’s Day
Coronavirus COVID-19 Issues and Updates in Divorce and Family Law
COVID-19 Divorce and Family Law Update for June 1st
The courts are scheduled to reopen on Monday, June 1, 2020. Please be patient because many hearings and court appearances have been deferred and rescheduled over the past few months due to Coronavirus COVID-19 court closures and limitations. Scheduling new hearings and court appearances requires patience because there are so many people waiting for hearings on several divorce and family law matters.
Attorney Leslie Barrows and her team of attorneys and staff at the Barrows Firm are here for you and your family during this challenging time.
The Barrows Firm in Southlake is Open for You and Your Family Matters
At the Barrows Firm, we remain open and are conducting client consultations, mediations, and appearing at hearings via Zoom. There are plenty of things we can do for our clients who are waiting for in-person hearings on several matters. In the meantime, we can work on discovery demands and responses, for example. Preparing for temporary order hearings is another thing we can do with clients waiting for their hearing if they otherwise could not have one using Zoom.
Amended Temporary Emergency Standing Order
Effective May 30, 2020, and expiring on December 31, 2020, unless further ordered, the Tarrant County Family District Courts (the following districts: 231st, 324th, 233rd, 325th, and 322nd) signed an Amended Temporary Emergency Standing Order on May 19, 2020. The standing order is for the protection of the parties, their children, family pets, and property while a family lawsuit is pending before the court.
Please note that this is different from what is normal in Tarrant County, where there were no “standing orders” automatically applied by the Court, like it is done in other neighboring counties such as Dallas, Denton, and Collin. In Tarrant County, most attorneys and their clients use agreed on reciprocal orders to accomplish the same goals as a standing order. The main difference is the new temporary standing orders are automatic when your lawsuit is filed.
A Quick Summary of The Amended Temporary Emergency Standing Order:
- No Disruption of Children;
- Protection of Family Pets or Companion Animals;
- Conduct of the Parties During the Case;
- Preservation of Property and Use of Funds During Divorce Case;
- Personal and Business Records in Divorce Case;
- Insurance in Divorce Case;
- Specific Authorizations in Divorce Case;
- Service and Application of This Order;
- Effect of Other Court Orders;
- Bond Waiver.
No Jury Trials in Tarrant County Until August
Due to health concerns related to Coronavirus COVID-19, jury trials will not take place in Tarrant County until August. Following CDC guidelines, limiting close contact with others means protecting potential jurors and postponing jury trials until August. This should not cause a hardship for anyone with immediate family safety concerns as those matters will still be heard by the Court and temporary orders can hold families over until a Jury trial on contested issues becomes available.
If you did not know, Texas courts allow for Jury trials over certain elements of divorce and family lawsuits. Jury trials can be used to determine the status of marriage, child custody, and residential matters, as well as the status of property, values, and distribution. Learn more by reading our article, Jury trials in Texas divorce and family law.
Happy Graduation to the 2020 Seniors: Terminating Child Support
While many are sad that their high school seniors missed the rest of their year after leaving for spring break, the Denton County grads do have the honor of walking through graduation at Texas Motor Speedway, having their smiling faces in caps and gowns up on Big Hoss. Great Article: Texas Motor Speedway to Hold Graduation Ceremonies For Schools in Denton County.
As parents who are paying child support are likely looking forward to terminating child support payments and we can help you with that at the Barrows Firm. The process is straight forward but does require action and is not automatic.
Planning for Summer Travel and Summer Camps
Just recently in April, parents had the opportunity and deadline to give notice of their summer possession and travel plans. During Coronavirus COVID-19, it has been difficult at best to make concrete plans, not knowing what the future has in store. Will there be another shutdown? What if new hot spots are detected or the curve needs are flattening again?
We can help you with any of your concerns about summer travel with children including summer camps, now scheduled to open given Governor Abbott’s recent declarations. Remember that being a good co-parent means being a reasonable person. Giving the other parent a break can go a long way when you might need a favor down the road. While this summer may be different, it is still a great opportunity to spend quality time with your kids, especially knowing how fast they grow and leave the nest.
Attorney Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake is Here for All Your Coronavirus COVID-19 Issues and Updates (817) 481-1583
Court Orders and Modifications: Parents Drinking at Home
Alarming Alcohol Statistics and Parents Drinking at Home During Coronavirus
Drinking and drug use and abuse rates are alarming during the COVID-19 Coronavirus situation. Many people knew there would be an increase in alcohol consumption, but few may have realized how many problems would arise out of parents being stuck at home and kids being seemingly forever out of school. As we started learning to use Zoom for professional meetings, a few people started hosting Zoom happy hours with friends to keep in touch and be social. The problems start when the normal rules for social behavior are out the window. When the Zoom happy hours start earlier and people start finding day drinking acceptable, “during these times,” the best interests of children are at greater risk.
In a recent article by the Green Valley Recovery Center in California, the CDC reports alcohol sales have increased by more than 55 percent since quarantines began, as of the third week in March. Here in Texas, the Texas Alcohol Beverage Commission (TABC) reported significant increases in the sale of alcohol in Texas, as many stocked up at liquor stores, fearing a run on beverage supplies, despite liquor stores being deemed essential and remaining open during statewide and local shutdowns.
Got Questions About Your Divorce Decree, Co-Parenting, and Drinking or Drug Use and Abuse? Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake and Learn Your Rights and Options to Keep Your Children Safe. (817) 481-1583. Read the Barrows Firm Article: Court-Ordered Alcohol Testing: Soberlink and EtG Testing
While Texas is Slowly Reopening, Many Concerns Remain About Alcohol Use and Abuse
People are habitual. Habits are easy to make and easy to break. Many of us are now in the habit of ordering food and alcohol to go. Here in Texas, we can also have alcohol delivered right to our front door, which many argue is a great convenience that reduces drinking and driving. In a recent article, it appears alcohol to go sales may continue in Texas. While some praise the idea of delivery food and booze, others are concerned about an increase in excessive drinking at home.
Addiction and recovery professionals and therapists are rightfully concerned about alcohol abuse. It sneaks up on you, many will say, and what starts as an increase in drinking can easily slide into abuse and addiction. Many parents might joke about drinking more and enjoying their Zoom happy hours while the kids pretend to be studying and doing their online schoolwork, but just because everyone else is doing it, does not mean you should.
Imagine you are the primary parent and not only see on social media, but also hear from your children that when they are at the other parent’s house they see more alcohol in the refrigerator, more empties in the trash, and unfortunately the other parent being drunk or hungover during their parenting time.
Co-Parents Do not Buy the COVID-19 Coronavirus “Everyone Else is Drinking Excuse”
Without pressuring the kids to talk, many are quick to share or let the other parent know that something is going on with increased alcohol or drug abuse. People who may think they are getting away with it are dead wrong when kids are involved. Children do not think their parents are funnier when they are drunk. Kids do not feel safe when a parent abuses alcohol. Judges and opposing counsels are neither impressed by increased drinking because it is inconvenient to be shut down and ordered to stay at home.
People Ask for Scram and Soberlink Devices and Courts Will Order Them
While we all are likely worn out by the phrase, “during this time,” you can be certain that judges are ready willing and able to order parents to use Scram and Soberlink alcohol monitoring devices during this time while co-parenting and the best interests of the children are challenged by inappropriate and excessive drinking. Attorney Leslie Barrows has asked for court-ordered alcohol monitoring devices and she knows they work to keep people honest!
Scram systems offer remote devices that track and report alcohol use and monitoring. They offer products ranging from ankle monitors to hand-held breathalyzer systems. The technology used in court-ordered alcohol monitoring is effective compared to other methods used by courts in the past, including random ordered drug testing.
Soberlink is another effective professional alcohol monitoring system, not only for addiction recovery but also for family law. The Soberlink includes a hand-held breathalyzer, tamper detection, and facial recognition technology that instantly reports the test results to whomever you have set to receive immediate Soberlink data reports. There are all-in-one cellular Soberlink devices as well as a Soberlink device that connects to a smartphone for data transmission.
Do You Need a Modification Because the Other Parent is Drinking at Home with the Children?
A modification case is required to change and update what is already ordered in a divorce decree. There are several reasons for modifications, including a problem in co-parenting, such as increased drinking and drug use and abuse. Anything that places the safety and best interests of the children at risk may be grounds for filing a modification lawsuit.
In a recent Barrows Firm podcast, Leslie Barrows talks about modification cases and what you can expect. Please feel free to listen – Episode 6: What Does a Modification Case Look Like in Texas.
For Court-Orders, Modifications, and Other Relief Related to Co-Parenting, COVID-19 Coronavirus, and Parents Drinking at Home, Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583.
Divorce and Stimulus Checks for Coronavirus Aid
Divorce and Stimulus Checks for Coronavirus Aid
Divorced couples with questions about stimulus checks for Coronavirus Aid are already arguing over who gets the stimulus checks, and how it works with taxes and the children. Attorneys Leslie Barrows and Amanda Roark and the team at the Barrows Firm have already experienced families in conflict over the stimulus checks for Coronavirus aid and are here to help answer questions and solve problems.
How Much Will My Stimulus Check Be?
The amounts for Coronavirus aid stimulus checks are based on the adjusted gross income of the taxpayer's last-filed IRS tax return. Individuals with adjusted gross incomes less than $75,000 for 2019 should receive $1,200 per individual adult and $500 for each child under the age of 17 at the end of the 2019 tax year. So, couples will receive $2,400 plus $500 per child.
If you have not yet filed your 2019 tax return, the IRS will base your Coronavirus aid stimulus check will be based on your 2018 tax return. If you and your spouse filed joint returns the individual amounts are doubled, so for an adjusted gross income of $150,000, the couple should receive $2,400. Heads of household plus one child with an adjusted gross income of $112,500 should receive $1,700.
Smart Asset Tool – Coronavirus Stimulus Check Calculator: How Much Will I Get?
I Received My Ex-Spouse’s Stimulus Check Money, What Do I Do?
If you have filed for divorce or been divorced since the last filing of your tax return, and you were the head of household filing at that time, you might receive your ex-spouse's share of the Coronavirus aid money. If this happens you should send them their share of the funds received. Failure to turn over another’s stimulus check money could be a violation of federal law. Call the Barrows Firm if you have questions or concerns. Do not simply keep the money. If you believe your ex owes you money, that is a situation that should be addressed by a reasonable agreement.
Who Gets the Stimulus Check for Coronavirus Aid if I Have a Pending Divorce Case?
The IRS will deposit stimulus checks into the bank account listed in the last tax return, where any tax payment refund was deposited. The head of the household is the one to whom the stimulus checks will be sent.
Other Topical and Related Articles by the Barrows Firm:
How Can We Parent at Home Under Stay-at-Home Orders?
Child Support Modification and COVID-19 Coronavirus
Do Stimulus Checks for Coronavirus Aid Affect Child Support Obligations?
If you are divorced and owe child support payments that are past due and in arrears, the tax intercept orders by the Texas Attorney General Child Support Division apply. So if the parent owing child support is past due, the stimulus money can be intercepted and used to credit the past due balance. Another situation may be a divorce which is still pending, where the children live with one parent and the other parent was the head of household tax filer and is receiving all of the stimulus money, including that which is meant to support the expenses of the children. If this is the case and you have questions, please contact the Barrows Firm for help with stimulus checks for Coronavirus aid.
There are all kinds of ways to address the application of stimulus checks for Coronavirus aid, and negotiating reasonable agreements can be done by phone, email, or Zoom, without an expensive trip to court for a hearing.
What if my Ex Stole the Stimulus Check Money?
The IRS sends the stimulus check for Coronavirus aid to the account at the bank listed on the last tax return. They do not know whether you filed for divorce or were recently divorced. The checks are sent to the person who files tax returns as the head of the household.
If you believe or know that a stimulus check was sent to your ex and they have a portion of the stimulus aid that you should have received, call the Barrows Firm and talk to attorney Leslie Barrows or Amanda Roark about your rights and options for stimulus check money. Attorney Barrows has already negotiated resolutions to conflicts over stimulus checks, who gets them, and how they are being used.
Why Haven’t I Received My Stimulus Check Yet?
Trouble Getting Your Stimulus Check? Here Are Your Options
Most of the electronic stimulus check payments were sent on April 11 to arrive by April 15. Note that the IRS issued a 2020 tax deadline extension of the due date to file 2019 tax returns from the April 15th due date to July 15, 2020. So, if you haven’t filed your 2019 return, you still qualify for a stimulus check for Coronavirus aid.
On Friday, April 24, the first paper checks were mailed by the IRS. The first to receive the checks will be tax filers with an adjusted gross income of $10,000 or less. More checks will be forthcoming over weeks and months. Some reports say it could be fall before everyone eligible receives their stimulus checks for Coronavirus aid.
Call Us at the Barrows Firm for Help with Divorce, Custody, and Covid-19 Issues Including Stimulus Checks for Coronavirus Aid at (817) 481-1583.
How Can We Parent at Home Under Stay-at-Home Orders?
Divorce Attorneys Helping Parents Who Ask, How Can We Parent at Home Under Stay-at-Home Orders?
Southlake divorce attorney, Leslie Barrows, and her team of attorneys, paralegals, and staff at the Barrows Firm in Southlake understand how challenging it is to parent a child during or after a divorce and or custody case during stay-at-home orders. Parenting a child during a global pandemic outbreak is another matter. From questions and arguments about visitation exchange for possession to battles over how the stimulus checks are used, people can resist the temptation to take the frustration out on their former spouse.
If your possession time is affected, later we can always make adjustments. Leslie Barrows reminds us that our court orders are necessary when we cannot otherwise adjust on our own. The time one parent missed can be made up later, maybe after the end of the stay-at-home orders when there is more going on.
Do your best to co-parent well, and communicate well. Exchange information and expectations about health, safety, and protective measures. Talk about the masks, gloves, and restrictions reasonably and let your children feel safe and let them know this will pass and it is not the end of the world.
Psychology Today article – Talking to Kids About Coronavirus
What Does Your Possession Schedule Say? Follow it First
When the State and County Stay-at-Home orders were issued, and while schools were extending spring break before closing their doors for longer, there was much confusion among parents. Some co-parents immediately had disagreements about what the extension to spring break meant to their possession time. There was so much confusion that the State Attorney General issued an Emergency Order on possession and access schedules during COVID-19. clarifying that parents were ordered to use the original school calendar to interpret their possession schedules just as if the schools had not been closed.
We spend time and resources negotiating customized parenting plans and possession schedules because we have busy lives and complex calendars. A good co-parent will be flexible and work with the other when one needs a favor. An extra day or weekend here and there should be fine and not upset anything. The goodwill you build with your former spouse can be an important factor in a healthy co-parenting relationship because one day the favor asked might be your own.
Need an enforcement or modification case? Call us at the Barrows Firm (817) 481-1583. Read our article, Child Support Modification, and COVID-19 Coronavirus.
Visitation Exchanges for Possession Time During Coronavirus Stay-at-Home Orders
Travel between pick and drop off locations is essential, and is the expected performance of your duties in your court order, in most cases, your final divorce decree including your possession schedule. Despite concerns about the Stay-at-Home orders, most co-parents understood that they are allowed to leave and drive the children to their destination for visitation with the other parent.
Remember that everyone is inconvenienced in some way during the Stay-at-Home time. You might be an essential-deemed worker still traveling, or you may be instructed to work from home. Worse, you might be laid off or out of work because of the shutdown situation. The more we all work together the better we will be on the other side of this outbreak.
What if You or Your Child Gets Sick or Tests Positive for COVID-19
Kids Health article – Coronavirus (COVID-19) Pandemic: What to Do if Your Child Is Sick
Call your doctor or healthcare provider first. Second, call your divorce attorney if you have questions about your order regarding parenting rights and duties when it comes to healthcare. Common sense and precautions are important during any regular flu season and especially during a more challenging outbreak such as COVID-19 Coronavirus. If you or your son or daughter gets sick, is tested for, and has the Coronavirus, you should receive instructions from your doctor and county health department officials with instructions on what to do to properly quarantine.
If quarantine is necessary, both co-parents should make an effort to work well with the other in the best interests of the child, other children, and everyone else involved. If necessary, courts may be asked to enter Emergency Temporary Restraining orders or use other options to protect a child and a family when the child or a family member is sick, testing positive for COVID-19 Coronavirus.
Are You Concerned About Your Child’s Safety During Coronavirus Pandemic Precautions?
Call your lawyer before you engage in self-help or call 911 because your child tells you they were not required to wear a mask, gloves, and face shield while riding in the other parent’s vehicle. Recommendations by government agencies are not the same as orders issued in your divorce or custody case. Judges are very busy right now, with essential matters and all the liability involved in holding court in person and online using Zoom.
Sometimes it is a better idea to make a record of that with which you have a problem. Later, in an enforcement or modification case, your notes may help demonstrate patterns of questionable behavior. That said, if you believe your child is in actual and immediate harm or the threat of harm, call your lawyer and if necessary call the police.
Are You Violating the Stay-at-Home Orders? Don’t Post That on Facebook.
You don’t need to be a lawyer or creative problem solver to make the argument that certain activities fall within the essential exceptions to the order to stay at home and shelter in place until the state and counties order those preventative measures are no longer necessary to flatten the curve of infection and slow the spread of COVID-19 Coronavirus.
If you have determined that taking the kids out to the walking path, park, or lake, be aware that their other parent might not like the idea. And if you are posting it on social media, your honest and simple activity can get turned into the story of a passive-aggressive narcissist rule breaker, one your lawyer anticipates hearing about when you or the opposing counsel calls.
While we have not heard many cases of big busts or law enforcement cracking down on people out for “exercise” but if something does happen, as a kid gets injured, the spotlight and much worse consequences could be on your hands.
Attorney Leslie Barrows and Her Team at The Barrows Firm Can Help with Questions About Stay-at-Home Orders (817) 481-1583
Child Support Modification and COVID-19 Coronavirus
Child Support Modification Cases are Expected to Rise Due to COVID-19 Coronavirus
All over the DFW Metroplex, people are feeling the economic impact of the businesses forced to close, employees being laid off, and salaries being cut while families are ordered to stay and home, many of whom may need a child support modification. Even though stimulus money may be on the way and many companies are allowing people to postpone payments, it takes time. Also, the lines and time it takes to process and receive the bolstered unemployment benefits due to the current situation.
We do not need a degree in economics to understand the domino effect of business closures, layoffs, and reductions in staffing in all industries affected by COVID-19 Coronavirus. It will be some time before any of us see the full impact of the majority of the workforce being affected in some way.
There may be parents of children who never had child support ordered and have been working it out with one another individually. That can change when there is a substantial change of economic circumstances in a time like this with pandemic-related shutdowns. Others who do receive child support may not have gone back for a modification in many years and are suddenly looking into going for an increase.
See our related article, Emergency Order on Possession and Access Schedules During COVID-19 Pandemic
Example of Potential Client for Child Support Modification:
Bob owns a local restaurant that was forced to close and only sell take out to. Bob is running low on inventory and hears supply chains are interrupted. He doesn’t know how long he can keep the take out window open. Jimmy is the restaurant server out of work who cannot pay his rent for the house that Bob owns. Rent houses are great income until tenants stop paying, refusing to leave under temporary government protections. The mortgage still needs to be paid, if there is one. Meanwhile, the rent home owner’s wife Judy is a business executive at a firm that just cut salaries for a temporary but indefinite time. While both may be working, the cash flow is affected and Bob, might have to close the restaurant and he is already having a difficult time with the current child support payments for children from a past marriage.
In the above scenario, it is necessary to look at all the numbers to best determine whether a child support modification is an option for Bob, the child support obligor. To find out if he is eligible to file a child support modification due to economic losses tied to the COVID-19 Coronavirus outbreak, he should call the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583.
Are your kiddos asking you about what’s going on? Not sure how to talk about it with them? Consider the tips in this Psychology Today article, Talking to Kids About Coronavirus.
Eligibility to File a Child Support Modification Due to Coronavirus Income Loss
In Texas, there are several grounds for modification of child support. If you qualify under one of these categories, you can file a case for a child support modification. Note that these are the grounds listed in the Texas family code and apply to all types of situations, including economic changes as a result of the COVID-19 Coronavirus.
First, a child support modification is allowed if the circumstances of the child or person affected by the order have materially and substantially changed since the last order was entered.
Second, a child support modification is allowed if it has been three years since the last order was entered or modified and the amount of child support under the order differs by either 20 percent or $100 from the amount that would be awarded under the child support guidelines.
Material and Substantial Changes: Incomes Affected by COVID-19 Coronavirus
Employment changes are common material and substantial changes that qualify as grounds for a child support modification. How much the change affects the obligor’s ability to pay is what becomes the issue in determining if modification is an option. A few weeks of disproportionate pay is one thing, and a layoff is another. And on the other hand, a substantial increase in the noncustodial parent is also a ground to modify support.
Medical coverage changes can also be material and substantial for purposes of qualifying to ask the Court for a child support modification, whether you are the child support obligor (noncustodial) parent or the recipient (primary) parent.
Additional children, born after the last child support order, as well as children that are now living with a different parent, are additional elements in establishing grounds to modify child support.
Child Support Modifications by Agreement or Going to Court for a New Support Order
Here at the Barrows Firm in Southlake, we always hope for the best for our clients who co-parent and share financial responsibilities for their children. We know that in most families, income increases are easy to establish from paystubs and tax returns, and that makes a child support modification a somewhat straightforward process. However, we also know our clients who have complex incomes from various sources, making it a more arduous task to determine one’s net resources for purposes of establishing a new amount of child support.
Whatever your situation may be, the Barrows Firm has you in good hands, even if right now you are not shaking hands. While social distancing and being ordered to stay home because of COVID-19 Coronavirus, the Barrows Firm can still meet with you by phone and video conference. Attorney Leslie Barrows and her team of talented attorneys, paralegals, and staff can Zoom with you and figure out if and how to best help you with a child support modification.
Need a Child Support Modification to Increase or Decrease Support? Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake today at (817) 481-1583
Emergency Order on Possession and Access Schedules During COVID-19 Pandemic
Possession and Access Schedules Not Affected by School Closures
Governor Abbott declared a state of disaster in all 254 counties in Texas in response to the COVID-19 outbreak. Individually, our local independent school districts extended spring break and temporarily suspended classes, some for several weeks. The Governor issued a COVID-19 emergency order regarding court-ordered possession and access schedules.
The order states in pertinent part:
“For purposes of determining a person’s right to possession of and access to a child under a court-ordered possession schedule, the original published school schedule shall control in all instances. Possession and access SHALL NOT be affected by the school’s closure that arises from an epidemic or pandemic, including what is commonly referred to as the COVID-19 pandemic.”
Contact the Barrows Firm in Southlake if you have questions about school closures and your possession and access schedule. Our team can help you with your custody and visitation issues in light of temporary school closures. Divorce and child custody attorney Leslie Barrows and the team at the Barrows Firm attorneys are here to help. (817) 481-1583.
Keeping Children Safe During the COVID-19 Pandemic and School Closures
Talking to your kids about Coronavirus, COVID-19, and social distancing is important. Sometimes too much information can overwhelm concerned children. Make sure they know that they are going to be safe at home and that social distancing helps keep healthy people from getting sick. If you feel comfortable, explain to them how people who have no symptoms may be carrying the virus, and even though they may feel fine, they don’t want to infect others, including elders.
The National Association of School Psychologists offers an article on point: Talking to Children About Covid-19 (Coronavirus): A Parent Resource.
Spring Break Extensions, School Closures Options, and Possession Schedule Modifications
The Governor’s emergency order addresses modifications of their possession and access schedules, specifically stating, “Nothing herein prevents parties from altering a possession schedule by agreement if their court order(s), or courts from modifying their orders.”
With children out of school and at home for weeks at a time, the impact on families can be significant. Especially when there are young children, and children with specific needs, school closures can cause hardship for parents and children.
You can modify your court-ordered possession and access schedule if the COVID-19 pandemic and school closures are affecting your family. To modify your possession and access schedule you can negotiate an agreement with the other parent or you can file an original modification case.
The Barrows Firm Offers Information About Modifications of Possession and Access Schedules
On our website, we have short articles and podcasts explaining how modifications work and what you can expect if you need to take action because of the COVID-19 pandemic and related school closures.
Recent Article: The Child Custody Modification Process in Texas
Recent Podcast: Episode 6: What Does a Modification Case Look Like in Texas
Leslie Barrows and the talented attorneys and paralegals at the Barrows Firm are here for you and your parenting concerns about school closures and possession and access schedules, at (817) 481-1583.
The Child Custody Modification Process in Texas
Call Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake for Child Custody Modification (817) 481-1583
Over time things can change and we can become dissatisfied with a Texas divorce decree. During a divorce, parents work towards a co-parenting situation that fosters the best interests of the children involved in custody and visitation determinations. The custody and visitation schedule might work wonderfully for many years until it becomes outdated or things change in the family and the child custody and visitation schedules might not work as well. It doesn’t have to be anyone’s fault, rather the need for modification may likely be tied to the needs of growing kids with demanding schedules.
Remember that your court-ordered parenting plan and visitation schedule is there as a backup when co-parents cannot agree. In many families with a Standard or Expanded Standard Possession Schedule, parents can adjust and trade time back and forth as necessary and when schedules and life happen. That said, when parents cannot get on the same page, they can fall back on their decree and orders.
If the currently ordered possession schedule no longer works, a modification can address the problems. Likewise, if one of the parents is having serious difficulties as a conservator, their parental rights and duties can be modified to preserve the health, safety, well-being and overall best interests of the children involved.
Take a Moment to Listen to Our Latest Texas Divorce Lawyer Podcast – Episode 5: What Does A Divorce Case Look Like in Texas
Attorney Leslie Barrows and her team of family lawyers at the Barrows Firm are ready to help you and your family. Attorney Amanda Roark is another fine divorce lawyer who works on Barrows Firm cases along with Leslie Barrows. To schedule a consultation to learn your rights and options, call the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583.
What is the Process for Child Custody Modification Cases in Texas?
Child custody is a general term and in Texas, this refers to conservatorship (parental rights and duties), possession and access of the child, and which parent has the exclusive right to determine the child’s primary residence. A court with continuing, exclusive jurisdiction may modify an order for the conservatorship, support, or possession of and access to a child.
The parent, or person with standing to bring a suit under the Texas Family Code, may file the suit for child custody modification with the original court issuing the divorce decree, or order in a suit affecting a parent-child relationship. The standard rules of Texas Civil Procedure apply to a suit for modification, so the process is like the original suit for divorce.
You may have a similar discovery process, temporary orders, mediation, and other settlement negotiation procedures. To learn more details about the process for a child custody modification, please refer to our recent article, What is the Divorce Process in Texas?
What Are the Grounds Necessary for a Child Custody Modification in Texas?
A material and substantial change in circumstances must be established in order to qualify for a child custody modification. The material and substantial change must occur after the date the current order was signed. Children at the age of 12 or older can talk to the judge in chambers when a motion is filed as part of a child custody modification case. Note that the judge is not required to agree with or rule in favor of the child’s wishes, and the judge can make his or her independent decision based on the best interests of the child.
Another ground for a child custody modification is the allegation that the parent who was appointed as the conservator with the exclusive right to determine the residence of the child, has, in fact, relinquished their title and right as the primary parent to the other parent for at least six months. When that happens, the non-primary parent can file a child custody modification case, asking the judge to appoint them as the conservator parent with the primary right to determine the residence of the child.
Note that military service and deployment does not apply in a case where the other parent claims the primary parent has voluntarily relinquished their rights. In fact, there are specific rules for parents, conservatorship, and possession and access in the Texas Family Code.
Psychology Today offers a helpful article about child custody disputes: Three Rules for Negotiating Child Custody, Three things parents fighting over custody should know.
Modification of the Exclusive Right to Determine the Primary Residence of a Child Within One Year of the Order
The Texas Family Code allows for child custody modification within one year of the last custody order entered by the court of original jurisdiction, or the date the parties sign a mediated settlement agreement on which the order is based. Attached to the suit to modify, the party seeking the modification is required to attach an affidavit supporting the facts alleged in the suit for modification and at least one of the following must be alleged:
- The child’s present environment is a danger to their physical health or may significantly impair the child’s emotional development;
- The parent or person with the exclusive right to designate the primary residence of the child is the person asking for the child custody modification and that requested modification is in the best interest of the child; or
- The person or parent with the exclusive right to designate the primary residence of the child has voluntarily relinquished the primary care and possession of the child for at least six months and that the modification is in the best interests of the child.
When you meet with your child custody modification attorney at the Barrows Firm in Southlake, you and your attorney can discuss what happened and what strategy is most likely to solve conflicts and high-stakes child custody issues.
Another interesting Psychology Today article: Shared Physical Custody After Divorce: "Fair" to Children? Everyone likes shared custody, but there are emotional drawbacks for children.
Can You Change Custody, Visitation, or Child Support with an Agreed Modification?
Yes, you can modify child custody, conservatorship, support, and possession and access through agreements with the other parent, to settle your issues and modify your parenting plan outside of court. The procedure is still required but when you agree with the other parent or person with custody, the entire case moves along much quicker and saves time and money for all.
Call Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake to Get Started with Child Custody Modification Suits by Calling for a Consultation Meeting at (817) 481-1583.
What is the Divorce Process in Texas?
Hiring the Right Divorce Lawyers for the Divorce Process in Texas
The Barrows Firm attorneys in Southlake, Texas are aggressive divorce lawyers prepared to go the distance with you when winning matters in the divorce process in Texas. Being that prepared for any twists and turns means the Barrows Firm team also knows when strategy means taking different turns in the divorce process in Texas. For example, when we can advise you on when to settle and when to litigate and let you make that decision while knowing what you may be in for if you take issues all the way to final trials.
During a divorce and family law consultation with attorney Leslie Barrows and Associate Attorney Amanda Roark, you will learn your rights and options. Your information and allegations about divorce and child custody are written in your divorce petition, the first filing in the divorce process in Texas.
Article recommendations from Psychology Today:
Don’t Confuse Revenge with Justice: Five Key Differences
Three Tips for Avoiding a Nightmare Divorce
What is the Residency Requirement to Divorce in Texas?
For a District Court in the county where you live to have jurisdiction to hear your divorce lawsuit you must first be a resident of the State of Texas for at least six months and a resident of your county where you are filing for at least 90 days.
Texas residents in military service, on deployment, are still Texas residents for purposes of residency requirements for divorce suits. There are additional laws in the Texas Family Code about military service members and child custody and visitation.
Filing and Serving the Petition for Divorce
After you and your Southlake divorce attorney have the divorce petition filed with the clerk of the district court, the other party will be served. Most of the time a county constable in your precinct will serve your soon to be ex at the address you provide. In some suits, a petitioner suing for divorce can also request a Temporary Restraining Order (TRO) to prevent the other spouse from spending, stealing, or hiding marital property. If a TRO is requested and issued by the court, a hearing will be scheduled within 14 days to allow both parties to testify as to whether the TRO should remain.
The respondent is the person served with the divorce. They have 20 days plus the next Monday, to file a response to the divorce petition and submit any of their requests for any temporary orders. A Temporary Orders Hearing is held shortly thereafter to determine who lives where, who drives what, who has what money or support of themselves and children during the divorce. Being well-prepared for a Temporary Orders Hearing is important because many of the conditions determined will carry through the divorce and in the final decree.
Discovery Requests and Documents in the Divorce Process in Texas
After a divorce petition is filed and served the attorneys for the parties send one another discovery demands and document requests. The discovery process is used to determine what facts and evidence are available to help determine property and children’s care decisions. Through exchanging discovery, the parties learn who the other one plans to call as witnesses and what evidence they will use to prove their allegations in their petition for divorce. The parties might object to some of the discovery requests or not turn over information the other believes exists. There are several tools the lawyers can use to get the information they need to win.
Discovery can include written requests to produce and turn over documents for review. Discovery can also include written questions and answers to discovery information such as witnesses who may be called to testify in court. Texas divorce lawyers also conduct discovery depositions where the parties and witnesses answer questions about important issues and evidence. Almost all depositions are recorded with audio and video that can come back later in the case and could be presented in front of a judge and jury.
Mediation and Settlement Negotiation in Texas Divorce and Custody
Most parties in contested divorces with conflict are required to attend mediation with a mediator. Simply put, mediation allows the parties to put everything on the table and figure out their respective bottom lines when it comes to what they are seeking in property and child custody. Most mediators are lawyers who receive specific training in mediation and the process of dispute resolution. One of the advantages of mediation is that there is no evidence taken so people and their lawyers can speak more freely in negotiating towards a settlement without worrying about how what was said will affect their case.
Mediation is a good process to help both parties figure out what they can agree on and what are the high-conflict issues that may need to be resolved in court. When contested issues can be resolved in mediation, a mediated settlement agreement can be signed and when it meets proper writing requirements it can become part of the court’s binding judgment.
Southlake Attorney Leslie Barrows is a Divorce Trial Lawyer and a Mediator
Final Trials and Appeals in the Divorce Process in Texas
When there are contested issues that cannot be resolved in mediation or settlement negotiations, the parties will proceed to a final trial where each side can present their evidence and seek to prove their allegations. In Texas divorce trials a jury can be sought to make certain rulings, where otherwise the judge would make decisions. After the end of the final trial, the judge may take some time to review all the evidence and make their findings of fact and conclusions of law which is sent to the parties. Then, one of the lawyers drafts the final judgment and divorce decree which is then entered and becomes the court’s order.
In cases with children and contested custody, the court hearing the original case keeps jurisdiction over the parties and any modification or enforcement actions filed must be determined in the same court.
Appeals are not common but are permitted when the party filing the appeal makes a case that the judge made an error of law or otherwise erred in the process of making rulings in the divorce suit. There needs to be something more legally significant than a party not liking the outcome.
How Long is the Divorce Process in Texas?
The shortest divorce in Texas could be just short of three months because Texas divorces are not final until at least 60 days after the divorce petition is filed with the district court clerk. The longest divorce could take years to litigate and resolve when there are significant conflicts over property and child custody. The more issues involved and the more complex they are, the more time and extra moving parts there are in the divorce process in Texas. In the middle, most divorces can be negotiated, settled, or litigated within six months to one year or longer.
Note that if one of the parties is pregnant or becomes pregnant during the divorce suit, the court will likely wait until the baby is born to finalize the divorce.
If you want to save time and money, you can focus on being open to mediation, and compromise over conflicts with your ex. If you stand firm to disagree with everything he or she says and wants, you should be prepared for your divorce lawsuit to take a long time and involve significant attorney’s fees. That said, your family matters and depending on the issues, standing your ground may be the best decision you make.
Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake for More About the Divorce Process in Texas (817) 481-1583.
Divorce Taxation: Avoiding Penalty for QDRO Distribution Withdrawals
In Divorce, Pensions are Divided Using a Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO)
Divorces in Texas require the parties community property to be divided equitably, including money in 401k retirement plans and accounts. The values of 401k plans are usually valued at the date of divorce and are divided using a form called a Qualified Domestic Relations Order (QDRO). While some people receive the funds from a 401k division using a QDRO and roll that money right into their own 401k investment account. However, some people want access to the cash value of the amount they receive following the entry of the QDRO.
A Qualified Domestic Relations Order is a form that identifies the 401k plan participant and the alternate payee who should receive an equitable distribution of funds. There are general QDRO forms, and specific forms and models used by individual plan administrators. For example, see the QDRO information page on the Teacher Retirement System of Texas (TRS) on their website.
If you are the Alternate Payee named to receive your equitable share of QDRO funds, and you chose to take an early distribution before reaching the age of 59 ½ you will the owe the IRS an early distribution penalty if you do not otherwise inform them that you qualify to avoid additional taxes on qualified retirement plans by completing an additional tax form, IRS Form 5329.
Got Divorce Taxation Questions? Call Southlake Divorce Attorney Leslie Barrows (817) 481-1583.
Turbo Tax: 10 Things You Need to Know About Divorce and Taxes
Divorce Taxation Issues and Questions that Arise During Divorces
Divorce taxation comes up during negotiations about property division, financial support of parties and children, and of course, the division of retirement funds and accounts. Divorce lawyers frequently advise their clients to get divorce taxation advice from qualified tax advisor professionals. Likewise, the tax professionals refer back to the divorce lawyers when they receive questions about who should be entitled to what monies and how.
For most families with straight forward finances, determining divorce taxation answers is easy. But when there are complicated business interests, investments, and stock ownership and options, the issues of revenue and taxation are more complicated. For example, the event triggering the sale or transfer of monies and financial interests can affect tax liability depending on how and when that event takes place. In many situations, it is best when the parties can work together in a way those divorce taxation dilemmas are resolved in everyone’s favor, and not in the favor of IRS.
Generally, a 10 Percent Early Withdrawal Penalty Applies When Cashing In QDRO Money
If you were not aware of early withdrawal penalties, do not be concerned. In the realm of divorce taxation and tax laws applying to QDRO money, the laws can change from year to year and all the experts must approach tax questions and research the current laws and implications of their application.
Let’s say you want to use the money you receive from the 401k distribution to make a down payment on a home. If you can avoid a 10 percent early withdrawal penalty, you have more money to use in getting your new life going after your divorce.
A New IRS Requirement Allows a Waiver of the 10 Percent Early Withdrawal Penalty
If you are the Alternate Payee, meaning you are the one receiving money from a 401k distribution ordered in your divorce decree, you may take advantage of the opportunity to avoid a 10 percent early withdrawal penalty. For many people, this 10 percent can mean substantial savings if you want or need to cash in your QDRO award.
When you sit down to prepare your tax returns after divorcing, you can separate early distributions by completing additional IRS forms allowing you to avoid owing the 10 percent tax on those early distributions.
Now, the Alternate Payee Uses IRS Form 5329 to be Exempt from the Penalty
IRS Form 5329 applies to the additional tax on early distributions from qualified retirement plans including IRAs, modified contracts, and Roth IRAs. You should consult an independent tax advisor qualified to advise and assist with tax forms and filings. They can help you with Form 5329, to be completed and attached to the main Form 1040 or 1040NR. You can also review IRS Form 5329 and this Investopedia article, Retirement Plan Tax Form 5329 for more information and instructions on completing the forms and marking “06” on line 2 and filling in the exempt amount.
Denton and Tarrant County Divorce Attorney Leslie Barrows Can Answer All Your Divorce Taxation Questions (817) 481-1583
The Barrows Firm attorneys, paralegals, and staff welcome your questions about divorce taxation, and all other financial matters that affect you and your family now, and in the future. Principal and founding divorce attorney, Leslie Barrows has professional relationships with all the best tax experts and financial planning advisors who know how best to turn your finances in the best direction after divorce. It is likely that these divorce and financial matters are stressful and at the Barrows Firm, we do whatever we can to make the transition easier and reduce your stress level.
5 Reasons Divorce Lawyers are Busy in January
Divorce Lawyers like Attorney Leslie Barrows are busy with January Divorce and Child Custody Cases
Divorces, child custody, and modification cases are filed more frequently in January, right after the holidays are over and children go back to school. Southlake divorce lawyer, attorney Leslie Barrows knows that people who do their research, find that January is a good time to file their family law case, get their discovery documents ready, and hopefully have their Temporary Orders hearing before spring break and Easter.
Anyone considering filing a new divorce, child custody, or modification case should get the right legal advice from experienced divorce and family law attorney they feel they can trust. Your divorce lawyer needs to know everything about you and the facts of your case so they can represent you with the best strategy to get you what you need.
Read our article, Divorcing with Children 102: Child Custody
To learn your legal rights and options, call Southlake divorce lawyer Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm to schedule a consultation for divorce, child custody, and modification cases. Attorney Leslie Barrows is also a family law mediator. Call (817) 481-1583.
5 Reasons Divorce Lawyers are Busy in January:
1. The Holidays Give People Confirmation they are Making the Right Decision
When a marriage is failing and the distance between spouse increases, it is easier to avoid conflict and fights. In many troubled marriages spouses who once pledged their undying love for one another end up becoming more like roommates.
The holidays involve stimuli that pull us out of our routine and comfort zones. Seeing friends and families can remind us of all kinds of things that make us naturally question ourselves and if we are happy in our lives. For those who know things are not good, they may want to let relatives know over the holidays if there is a divorce coming up soon.
Psychology Today: Why is January Divorce Month?
2. Kids are Back in School and Young Adults are Back in College
By the middle of January, the older children in college are starting their spring semesters in college and the younger ones are settled back in their school routines. Many people wait until after the holidays to get divorced because they are not disrupting Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years with a substantial life change like a divorce.
We all want to give our children and ourselves the best holiday experiences and memories. By waiting until January to start a family law lawsuit, we don’t disrupt anyone. Divorces filed around the beginning of the year usually have their Temporary Orders in place before spring, and everyone has time to get used to possession schedules and new living situations.
3. Other Business May be Slow and January is a Good Time to Start a Divorce
In many industries, January is a slow month and people have more time to work on their divorce case. In a new divorce, child custody, or modification case there are discovery document requests and exchanges, depositions and interrogatory questions to answer. The process of exchanging discovery can be extensive, so being able to devote some extra time to your case may be easier for people if they are in a slower month at work.
Waiting until the new calendar year might also make it easier to determine estimated annual income and expenses. Some people who receive variable year-end bonus income will be asked to determine their current income after the end of the calendar year. There are many other reasons January is a cleaner and easier time to start a divorce lawsuit.
Divorce Net: How to Find Hidden Assets in Divorce
4. Possession Schedules Do Not Work and Co-Parents Need a Modification Case
As children grow older the possession schedules that used to work, might not work any longer. For example, kids in junior high and high school get busy with extracurriculars. Many teenagers prioritize spending time with their friends and playing sports. The possession schedules set in place when the children were younger, might need to be revisited. To get new final orders for co-parenting and possession, a modification case is necessary.
A modification case can be amicable when the co-parents can agree on new possession arrangements that work best for everyone. What gets more contentious are the cases filed to modify which parent has the exclusive right to determine the residence of the children. Where family violence is alleged, joint conservatorship is at issue and one parent will likely become the sole conservator and have the right to determine where the child lives.
Learn more about Texas Child Possession and Access Schedules
5. A January Divorce Filing Can Lead to a Temporary Orders Hearing before Spring Break
At a Temporary Orders hearing the parties in a family law case have a short hearing to determine who will live where drive which cars, and pay for which bills while the divorce case is active. In emergency cases involving family violence, a protective order can issue and can order the offending party to leave the marital residence.
Temporary Order hearings are designed to ensure the best interests of the children and to order the continuation of the status quo while the divorce suit is pending. Until there are temporary orders the parties are not encouraged to be taking vacations out of town with the children. Once there is a Temporary Order that says who can do what and how parents can make plans. To make sure you get everything in place before spring break and Easter, January is the time to get the ball rolling in your family law case.
When You Have a Reason to File a January Divorce, Child Custody, or Modification, Call Attorney Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583.
Custody Logs and Our Family Wizard in Divorce and Child Custody Cases
Do Custody Logs Work
Divorce and child custody cases are easier to manage when you and your lawyer have good custody logs and records when there are conflicts over the custody and possession schedules in temporary orders and the court’s orders after the final trial. Sometimes former spouses have new partners and issues leading to conflicts. Properly maintained custody logs have come a long way and new technology makes keeping a custody calendar so much easier in a divorce or suit affecting a parent-child relationship, where the parents are not married but have a child custody suit.
Who has the kids and when? Are there upcoming special events? When am I required to give the other parent notice of what days I’m taking possession during summer break? A custody log also called a custody calendar, helps everyone understand who needs to be where and when. Keeping a custody log helps keep the peace when records of custody exchanges are easily produced in the event of a conflict among co-parents.
It might seem like a lot of work to maintain a daily custody log and calendar with several schedule entries and notes but it can be easy with some of the great new apps and built-software to handle all your family’s needs. So, where people used to keep notebooks and ledgers with receipts and paperwork, everything is possible today with an app like Our Family Wizard for your custody logs.
Southlake divorce attorney Leslie Barrows can help you with custody conflicts and challenging questions. Call the Barrows Firm at (817) 481-1583.
Following a Parenting Plan and Possession Schedule in Texas Divorce
In most contested custody suits and divorces, at a temporary orders hearing, the temporary custody and possession schedule is set in place. Easily, the temporary orders custody situation becomes permanent after the final trial. During the divorce, the parents might find out that the temporary custody situation is not going to work for one reason or the other.
Tech alert: Divorce is hard. These 7 apps can make coordinating and communicating with your ex easier.
Even though the former couple may be able to learn to co-exist and get along as co-parents, it may take some time and bumps along the road. Fixing a broken situation may require showing a judge, guardian at litem, attorney, or other professional involved in the case about what is actually happening.
The key is establishing the expected custody schedule and using custody logs and supportive evidence when making an argument in favor of modifying or enforcing the custody arrangement and possession schedule ordered by the Court.
What is a Custody Log in a Texas Divorce and What is its Purpose?
Many judges will order the parties to create and maintain custody logs, however the parties can make that happen. An attorney may ask the Court to order a specific custody log format such as the Our Family Wizard software app, which is specifically developed and used in divorces with high conflict child custody cases.
See the Custody Exchange article, Organize Your Custody Case with a Digital Journal.
The custody log helps two parents make good habits regarding their custody and possession schedules. When people learn to make it a daily habit to manage custody calendars. This also means that parents can make it a habit to prepare for birthdays, holidays, and schedule changes ahead of time, to avoid conflict. Co-parents who work well with custody exchanges can keep track of everything and juggle schedules without unnecessary drama.
Attorney Barrows is a divorce attorney with years of experience with a variety of custody log systems including the current favorite of many, Our Family Wizard, designed with all the best features for co-parenting and custody exchanges.
Using Our Family Wizard (OFW) for Custody Logs and Records
Digital records are easier to maintain with the Our Family Wizard app. With real-time date, time and location information, the parties can rely on the software that cannot be faked or manipulated. A simple entry in the Our Family Wizard app is much easier to do than running into the local fast food restaurant designation spot and buying a Coke so you have a time-stamped receipt.
Parents who address concerns about parental alienation can use the OFW app to show a pattern of problems that might otherwise be one’s word against the other. In the section of the OFW app where parents exchange information, the grammar checker can alert to aggressive tone, asking the sender if they want to re-word their entry.
When the judge has real-time access to the custody log on OFW and can be notified if necessary, it is easier for the Court to make custody decisions about conflicts, enforcement, and modifications.
Even if you are not in a high-conflict divorce or custody situation, custody logs like the OFW app make it really easy for good co-parents to maximize their kiddos’ opportunities and busy schedules. To learn more, read our custody logs article, Divorcing with Children 104: Using Our Family Wizard.
With Questions and Concerns about Custody Logs, Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake (817) 481-1583
Barrows Firm Holiday Survival Tips
Divorcing Over Christmas and New Years: Barrows Firm Survival Tips
Divorce and holidays are challenging. You do not have to be a wreck or hide out until after New Years' Day. Southlake Attorney Leslie Barrows has a few holiday survival tips to help create more laughter and good memories with your children and to boost your co-parenting skills. While you cannot change the fact that you got a divorce or had a child custody case, you can change your attitude about the situation if things did not go well.
When you focus on appreciating you have children because you were with your ex, you can learn to have a better attitude of gratitude. When you make an effort to laugh and sing, you boost your spirits and those around you. Keeping your positive attitude and patience, you can lead by setting good examples. As you and your kids create new traditions, focus on the present and the future. And when buying and giving gifts to your children, remember that it is not a competition for their love and respect, so take the opportunity to always remind them what Christmas is all about.
If you work at it, you can make this and every next Christmas season magical. Of course, if there are problems beyond your control and custody emergencies arise, you can always call Southlake Divorce Attorney Leslie Barrows if you need some muscle or to get into court.
Check out our blog article with more information, Divorcing with Children 107: Preparing for the Holidays
Appreciating Your Ex Because You Have Children Together
Especially if this is your first, second, or maybe third holiday season after divorce, you may still be angry and upset with your ex. Allowing yourself to feel, helps you heal. So when a song, favorite movie, or a Christmas card from someone triggers your mixture of good and bad thoughts and memories, take a moment to focus on how much you love your children.
When you start feeling upset or someone brings it up, learn to say that you appreciate your ex because without them you wouldn’t have your kids. Also, learn to say that you believe your ex wants to be a good parent and they are also important to your children.
Barrows Firm Holiday Survival Tip: Never talk badly about your ex because your kids are half you, and half them. The worst thing a child could hear is that you hate the half of them that comes from their other parent. Just don’t do it.
Laughing and Singing for Elevating Your Spirits
You know what traditional holiday movies and songs make you laugh, and which ones make you cry. If you want to have the best holiday season, focus on laughter and song. Watch some comedy holiday movies with the kids. Sing songs and turn up your favorite rocking around the Christmas tree tunes.
Laughing and singing is good for you and your children. Keeping spirits bright means doing things that make you laugh and sing. This article is great and it offers some creative ways to make things goofy and fun, such as the Ugly Christmas Sweater Day: 5 Hillarious Ways to Laugh Off Holiday Stress
See also, 10 Funny and Heartwarming Quotes to Help You Survive the Holidays
Co-Parenting One Day at a Time: Attorney Barrows Recommends a Positive Attitude
True or False: If your ex screws up the holiday possession schedule, you should make them regret the day they screwed up your holiday season? FALSE
While you may remember the dream sequences in the popular 80s movie 9 to 5 (about all those things people dream about doing to their boss), it is best to keep those thoughts in your head and use the opportunity negotiate something that works much better for you, like a few extra days in January so you can take the kids on a surprise weekend getaway.
A key Barrows Firm holiday survival tip is to be reasonable and not build a case against your ex if something goes wrong. However, if there is a serious matter and you really need to go to court for a custody order enforcement action, call Leslie Barrows.
Creating New Holiday Traditions and Doing Something New
Whenever a family goes through a substantial change such as a divorce, most divorce lawyers and child custody mental health professionals recommend creating new holiday traditions. Southlake divorce attorney Leslie Barrows offers a pro tip: “Instead of focusing on what day you do things, focus on what new traditions you are creating with your kiddos.” So instead of always decorating the Christmas tree on a specific day, focus on the process. For example, start making a tradition of sharing stories about favorite ornaments or making a trip together to hunt for some great new ornaments.
As both you and your ex separately create new traditions with the children, they will start to look forward to those from year to year. After not long at all, the new traditions and happy memories become something to cherish.
Barrows Firm Holiday Survival Tip: Maybe a new tradition is a holiday vacation! So long as it works with your possession schedule and you plan ahead, consider a few popular holiday vacation destinations! 7 Best Christmas Getaways in Texas
Avoiding the Gifting Competition and Focusing on the Meaning of Christmas
When Christmas comes during or recently after divorce, some parents tend to overcompensate by giving more gifts than usual, and gifts that may seem excessive. Sometimes the non-primary parent sees an opportunity to show their children how much they love them by overdoing it on Christmas gifts. Let us not assume that this is intentional, rather a knee-jerk reaction to emotions and adjustment.
The important message about Christmas should be that both parents and sides of the family love the children and cherish their time with them during the holidays. By overcompensating with excessive fights, your kids might suspect that you are trying to make up for a shortfall. So try to remember how much you love your children and show them by spending quality time with them instead of showering them with excessive presents.
Leslie Barrows and the Southlake Divorce Attorneys, Paralegals, and Staff at the Barrows Firm Hope You Enjoy the Barrows Firm Holiday Survival Tips and Have a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. Call the Barrows Firm Anytime at (817) 481-1583.
Divorce and Cohabitation During Divorce: When It Can Work
When people file for a divorce it is common for one of the parties to pack their bags and leave the house. However, some couples decide to stay living together, cohabitating during divorce. Not everyone wants to spend the money on supporting two households during a divorce, and some simply cannot afford to pay for separate residences while also paying for the divorce.
It might work well for some couples to live together during divorce, and for others, it would not be a good option. If you are getting divorced and are considering staying in the home together during the divorce, know that you can change your mind at any point. Especially if things go from polite to hostile, you might need to make other arrangements for separate living spaces.
If you and your spouse can continue cohabitating during divorce, the divorce process itself might be easier and more agreements might be possible. You should talk to your divorce lawyer if you want legal advice about the implications of living together during divorce. For example, can you stay under the same roof and not discuss the terms of the divorce? What does your divorce lawyer recommend regarding communication during cohabitation during the divorce?
Divorce Magazine: 8 Survival Tips for Living Together During Divorce
Call attorney Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake to discuss your rights and options, and whether living together during the divorce is worth consideration. (817) 481-1583.
Would You Consider Living Together During Divorce?
Many people would say it really depends on the circumstances, whether two divorcing people could stand living together during a divorce. For example, some couples divorce after years of disagreement about finances, work, and family life. If your divorce is a product of ongoing relationship problems and differences, but you can get along peacefully, you might be able to keep living together for a while, during divorce.
From the HuffPost, read about high-income earners who chose cohabitation to save money in this article, The Unselfish Divorce: Separating But Living Together. If you are considering it, see also House Rules: 5 Tips to Being Divorced and Still Living Together.
If, however, you or your spouse did something that caused immediate and irreparable damage to the relationship, such as physical violence, obviously living together is not an option.
If you did consider cohabitating during the divorce, how long do you think you could keep living together? When asked this question, some respond that they have already put up with the other for so long, that they can probably stick it out for a while, knowing the divorce will be final before long.
How Children Could Benefit from Parents’ Cohabitation During Divorce
When you ask a child what they know about divorce, you might hear a variety of answers. If you and your spouse are good co-parents, despite your personal differences, you all might be able to show the children how divorcing parents can still get along well and take care of the kids.
Remember that you should not talk to your kids about the divorce, that violates a court’s standing orders, and whatever other temporary restraining orders or temporary orders apply in the divorce. That said, we all wonder if kids talk to their friends or cousins about what is going on, including their parents getting divorced. So, what might they say?
Even though kids' other friends might tell them their parents fought fiercely and cannot be in the same room together, your kids might be able to say that divorce is different for all families and their parents are divorcing while getting along and not fighting in front of the children.
The pattern of behavior children observe during divorce can give them an idea of what might be normal adult behavior. Kids can either watch and learn from parents who can get along peacefully, or kids can learn from parents who fight.
When Cohabitation May Not be in the Best Interests of Children
If there is any history of family violence, substance abuse, and other significant volatility, cohabitation can be a bad idea. If children know their fighting parents are getting a divorce but remaining in the house during the divorce, those kids might be terrified. Children might be concerned that mom or dad might start asserting their independence in ways that might not turn out well.
What the child perceives might simply be an uneasy and awkward sense. The child might pick up on everyone walking on eggshells. So unless two divorcing parents are sure they can maintain a positive status quo during the divorce, they might consider other options.
What About Cohabitation After Divorce? Some People Keep Living Like Roommates
Some couples may decide to continue saving money by staying in the same house, even after the divorce. There are plenty of families who have already done this, and they often find that the divorce makes it easier to tolerate one another without the uncertainty of their future in a bad marriage. Some might stay together while co-parenting and split once the kids leave the house. Others plan to live together after the divorce, and it works for six months or a year before one of the parties is just ready to move on or is in better financial shape to do so.
Every family is different and whether they can get along in cohabitation during divorce is determined on a case by case basis, often one day or week at a time. Call the Barrows Firm to learn your rights and options for your divorce in Texas.
Attorney Leslie Barrows is a Divorce Lawyer in Southlake, Texas at the Barrows Firm. Call the Barrows Firm for a Texas Divorce and Custody Consultation at (817) 481-1583.
Special Needs Children and Divorce
Divorce is challenging, especially on special needs children with a variety of mental and/or physical disabilities. Especially when a child has a mental disability, the process of, and the concept of divorce can cause more problems. For example, a child with autism may need additional love, support, and attention to make sure special needs children feel safe and secure.
Psychology Today: Divorce Cases Involving Children with Autism
Financial implications of divorcing with special needs children should be considered by parents and their divorce lawyers. When a family adjusts to a new living situation, a child with a physical disability might need new home aides and equipment. Child custody and support require additional care and attention when parents divorce and one or more children have special needs.
Although the Texas Family Law Code does define a list of factors to qualify a child as special needs or as having a disability, there are procedures a child custody lawyer can use to meet the needs of the family. Disabilities are conditions that impair someone’s movement, speech, daily function, and abilities to solve problems and make daily judgments.
Attorney Leslie Barrows is a divorce lawyer you can trust to negotiate and litigate for you and your children, so your family can accommodate special needs children during and after divorce. Call Leslie at the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583.
How the Needs of a Child with Special Needs Can Change with Time
Approaching issues of care for special needs children during divorce is tricky. Depending on the age of a child with a range of mental and/or physical disabilities, it might be necessary to review the needs of the child as they grow and mature. When you can anticipate that the needs of a child may change and are unforeseeable, it is important to consider the unknown future of a child and how they adapt as they grow older.
At the Barrows Firm, Leslie and her team of talented trial lawyers know that the needs of children with mental, emotional, and physical limitations can change. The Barrows Firm attorneys prepare for change by using a strategy that structures agreements and their provisions to anticipate what may come.
The Special Needs Alliance offers an article with more thoughts about the challenges of divorce when you have a child with special needs: Divorce and Children with Special Needs.
Court-Ordered Child Support for Special Needs Children
Chapter 154 of the Texas Family Code is the provision of law regarding court-ordered support for a disabled child. The law covers adult children as well as minor children. Texas law states that a court may order either or both parents to provide for the support of the child for an indefinite period once the following criteria are met.
First, the court must make a finding that the child requires substantial care and personal supervision because of a mental or physical disability and that the child will not be capable of self-support. Second, the court must find that the disability, or cause thereof, existed or was known prior to the 18th birthday of the child.
If the Court-ordered support is for an adult child, the Court may designate a special needs trust to receive support to be paid directly to the trust for the benefit of the adult child with special needs. Note that this is not the same procedure are using the state disbursement unit.
Note that ordered child support can impact a child’s social security or disability claims if any. When these benefits are an issue, Attorney Leslie Barrows consults with other experienced lawyers who often specialize in these specific legal areas.
Forming a Special Needs Trust to Support Special Needs Children
If you and the other parent agree or are ordered to create a self-funded special needs trust, Attorney Leslie Barrows can create a special needs trust in accordance with applicable Texas probate code provisions as well as the U.S. federal code as it may apply.
A special needs trust also referred to as a supplemental needs trust, is a trust that holds property, often money, solely for the benefit of a person with a mental or physical disability, such as a special needs child. In a divorce involving a special/supplemental needs trust, the Court’s order should identify the details regarding each parent’s rights and duties regarding the trust, ensuring that the needs of the child and their best interests are met.
Conservatorship and Possession and Access to Special Needs Children in Divorce
Beginning with your temporary order hearing, the court will order or consider the agreement of the parties about who is going to live where and who will pay for what during the divorce. When your child has special needs, however, it can be more difficult to adjust.
Experienced divorce lawyers like Attorney Leslie Barrows will prepare you for child custody issues and the process through which you can make your case on why you should be the primary parent. It might be necessary to use a qualified expert to offer testimony about what a particular child might need for daily care, and how that care can best be given to the child.
Call Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake with Your Questions About Special Needs Children and Divorce (817) 481-1583.
Divorcing With Children 108: Keep Kids Out of Divorce
Non-Litigation Tools for Parenting Time and Parenting Issues to Keep Kids Out of Divorce
There are many options for dispute resolution involving parenting time and parenting issues. Mediation, counseling, and communication are pathways to compromise and they help keep kids out of divorce. Parents want the best for their children and most parents feel that the best thing for their kids is to spend their time with them. The problem is the other parent probably makes the same argument. Parents argue over who gets the children and who can make which decisions about them. Most parents agree to try to keep kids out of divorce but they cannot come to an agreement and end up letting the process lead to the outcome.
There are better ways to resolve conflicts than exposing children to custody litigation. Often one parent wants to focus on alternative dispute resolution methods while the other just wants the lawyers to handle everything on paper and in court.
What people divorcing with children should know is that many mental health and family law attorneys and professionals agree that keeping kids out of divorce is better in the long run. High-conflict litigation can lead to all kinds of emotional reactions as well as short-to-long-term behavior and developmental concerns.
Leslie Barrows is a divorce lawyer Southlake, Texas families trust with their best interests, especially when divorcing with children. Attorney Barrows and her talented family attorneys and paralegals are there to help make the process as painless as possible. Call the Barrows Firm, Attorneys & Mediators (817) 481-1583.
Mediation, Family Counseling, and Parenting Communication
Alternatives dispute resolution methods keep kids out of divorce litigation and all the problems that can come along with exposing them to parenting and custody battles. Initially, your ex might not prefer the idea of doing mediation, counseling and communication-focused negotiation. But, when the attorneys talk to their clients, they often highlight the advantages of going to mediation, especially where it saves people time and resources for more important issues.
Psychology Today: Proving the Benefits of Mediation
Mediation to Keep Kids Out of Divorce
Mediation is a non-adversarial process designed to be non-confrontational. Both parties and their lawyers attend mediation. A third-party mediator experienced in Texas divorce, custody, and other family law issues will lead the parties through a process of talking about concerns without worrying about their statements being used as evidence in court.
Ideally, meditation helps people get down to the bottom line so parents can work out their conflict and come to an agreement on key elements of parenting and time with the kids. Mediation allows parents to sort things out and identify which, if any, issues need to be determined in court. This saves everyone time and money.
Family Counseling for Kids and Parents
A great family counselor can help the whole family. People who are not used to seeing a family counselor are likely to appreciate the value of working with a mental health professional. Counselors are good at helping us talk about our thoughts, concerns, and feelings in a safe and neutral environment. A family counselor can help parents and children get closer to understanding exactly what is bothering them and how to better understand their feelings about the divorce.
Kids need to know they are safe and that both their parents love them. When people divorcing with children have the opportunity to attend family counseling, they can get to a better place in their minds, which leads to better communication, and more effective mediation. When parents know their kids are going to be okay and they do feel safe and loved, then parents might be more successful in mediating conflict to stay out of court and keep kids out of divorce.
Parenting Communication for Better Compromise
Communication issues are roadblocks to negotiation and compromise. Whether preparing for mediation or family counseling, learning to say exactly what you mean can be as important as meaning exactly what you say.
Electronic communication can be dangerous to effective communication. Especially if you are exchanging text messages and emails, it is easy to assume a tone that the other does not intend. When one party thinks the other is being short about exchanging pick up and drop off information, the other may be trying to give the other space.
If the goal is to resolve as many divorcing with children issues as possible, being a patient and effective communicator is a must. Simply learning not to misconstrue things can help people along well. There are all kinds of resources available to be a better communicator, and many are found online.
Article recommendation: Tips on Communication With Your Spouse During a Divorce, from Marriage.com.
When Litigation Cannot Be Avoided, Keep Kids Out of Divorce at Home
Fitness as a parent, child abuse, and domestic violence issues may best be determined by a judge or jury. Based on the nature of other troublesome issues and extreme animosity, traditional litigation can be necessary as alternative dispute resolution practices are not going to be an option.
Divorcing with children and using traditional litigation does not need to be something to fear. In fact, the anticipation of things can often be much worse than the actual event, such as a custody hearing. At the Barrows Firm we know these are challenging times and we do everything to lessen the impact.
Even when we must proceed in high-stakes child custody litigation we know that moms and dads want to keep their kids out of their divorce. At every turn in a divorce case, we know what stress and anxiety parents and children are facing, so we focus on strategies that minimize open conflict and life disruption whenever possible.
Consult the Barrows Firm in Southlake when Divorcing With Children (817) 481-1583
Attorney Leslie Barrows and her team of family law attorneys, paralegals, and staff at the Barrows Firm understand how important it is to have the best possible experience when divorcing with children. They know you want to keep kids out of divorce litigation and preserve the status quo whenever possible, so everyone comes out of the divorce with their feet forward.
Leslie Barrows Selected Top Attorney for 2019 for Fort Worth Magazine
Congratulations to Attorney Leslie for being selected Top Attorney for 2019 for Fort Worth Magazine in the Family category. Look for the Top Attorney list in the December 2019 issue of Fort Worth Magazine!
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Divorcing with Children 107: Preparing for the Holidays
Tips for Preparing for Holidays when Divorcing with Children
The holiday season is challenging enough for happy couples with children. When you are preparing for, in the middle of, or just post-divorce, it is time to search for a new normal. Your outlook and attitude can be your best allies when it seems like everyone is against you. Despite the peril, you may feel, trying to give your children the best life you can provide, there can be good news about children of divorced parents.
As the study of divorce and children continues, mental health professionals make encouraging reports. Children are better off when their divorced parents worked to maintain positive attitudes in their parenting roles. While so many people worried that kids of divorce would have problems in life, the reality is many are well-adjusted. Divorcing with children does not mean your children are going to be worse off, and when you and the other co-parent keep a strong focus on the best interests of the kids, everyone’s lives can be healthier.
Enjoy this Kids Health article, Helping Your Child Through a Divorce
As Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas and other seasonal holidays are soon upon us, we have an opportunity to make things best for our kids, which in turn makes things good for us as parents. If you have a conflict with your spouse or ex, you have control over how you let conflict affect you as a parent and as a partner. Even if you feel you have to fake it until you make it through the holidays, you can be the one driving the bus.
Leslie Barrows is a Southlake divorce lawyer at the Barrows Firm and she can help. Whether you are facing a divorce, preparing to file after the Holidays, or need to modify your custody situation, Leslie and her team of talented family lawyers can are there to walk you through the entire process. Call Leslie at (847) 481-1583 or Contact the Barrows Firm online.
Make Plans Now if You Anticipate Holiday Travel – Get Into Court Now
If you anticipate a problem with your possession schedule and holiday events and family get-togethers, call your divorce lawyer now and don’t wait until it is too late to adjust your time with children and family. You might be able to negotiate a compromise with the other parent that saves everyone from a trip to court and the time and expense of asking a judge to make a decision when the parents cannot.
Remember that you and your former spouse should work together as much as possible to provide a good life for the kids, and quality time with both parents. However, there are parts of expanded family dynamics beyond your control. Especially when one of you remarries and blends families, your negotiation efforts can fall by the wayside and you need to go to court.
If you need your divorce lawyer to help intervene and go to court, do it now. When big trips are planned and family events are scheduled, most of us know in advance of scheduling conflicts. Your judge may want to know why the parties are unable to figure things out on their own. It is best if you have a known problem, to address it as early as possible. Judges usually dislike preventable emergency cases.
Your First Set of Holidays with Kids After Divorce
Once you are assured who will have the kids on what holidays, you can make plans. If you currently in a divorce case, refer to your temporary orders and standing orders to remind yourself of your rights and responsibilities as a single parent preparing for the holidays. Your new plans can remind you that quality time with your family does not have to be tied to a specific calendar date. You can also learn an appreciation for the best interests of your children, understanding how important it is for them to have quality time with both their parents.
Great Article: 5 Tips for Celebrating the Holidays with a Blended Family
Mental Health Professionals Help People Divorcing with Children
A good therapist can be valuable to parents and children in the conflict. The stress of a high-stakes divorce and child custody case can wear the strongest people down. People often tell their divorce lawyer all their thoughts and feelings about what is happening. While it is important to share information with your divorce lawyer, understand that they need that information to represent you and get the right outcome for you and your kids. Meanwhile, the mental health professionals are there to help fix you and help you prepare to find that new normal after the divorce.
Holidays and the seasons can be whatever you want them to be, within reason. If your divorce case is recent, you are probably operating under temporary orders providing for where the kids are going to be on the holidays and whether they will be with you or the other parent.
Knowing what lies ahead is valuable for anyone preparing for what is coming. For example, the holidays are coming whether we like or not. All we can control is our attitude, and a good therapist should help you get your bearings and be the best version of yourself during and after your divorce.
How do You Know You if You Need a Modification Case?
When there are significant changes in the life of a parent or child, a custody modification case might be necessary to fix co-parenting problems. Anything can happen to people and what might have worked before might no longer work and be in the best interests of your children.
When something happens and you need to go to court and ask for a modification of your possession schedule and custody plan, call Southlake divorce lawyer, Leslie Barrows, sooner than later. A modification case is an original lawsuit, similar to your original divorce action. If the holidays are your concern, call the Barrows Firm today so you can get into court soon.
When Preparing for Holidays when Divorcing with Children, and You Need a Divorce Lawyer, Call Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake, Texas at (817) 481-1583.
Leslie Barrows is an experienced divorce and family lawyer whose practice is focused on helping families heal and work on being the best they can be. Leslie has helped many people and their families in Tarrant County and Denton County courts. When winning matters and you have a high-stakes divorce or child custody conflict, you need strong and compassionate representation. Call the Barrows Firm or make contact online today.
Relocating with Children after Divorce in Texas
Reasons People are Relocating with Children after Divorce
There are many reasons to move after a divorce. A new job opportunity for the primary parent can be a reason for relocating with children after divorce in Texas. However, the further the distance from the other parent with possession and access, the more likely you might end up litigating the move in court on a modification case. Attorney Leslie Barrows and the divorce lawyers at the Barrows Firm can answer all your questions and give you a case evaluation so you can learn your rights and options.
What does your divorce decree say about your right to make a relocation decision that affects a child? If you have exclusive and unlimited rights to establish the residence of the child, you can go where you please, so long as the other parent is okay with it. It is a good idea to do the math and figure out what added costs you both may incur in exchanging parenting time. Sometimes the parent moving further away from the new job contributes to the added financial burden to the other parent if the travel time and cost increase significantly.
Another reason people are relocating with children after divorce is a new marriage. When blending families your ex-spouse may have an opportunity to move into their new spouses’ home, which could be a distance away. This can be difficult if your decree restricts your right to establish residence to a certain county or limited distance from a certain point.
You may like this HuffPost article: 6 Things to Expect and Consider When Relocating with Children After Divorce
Motion to Modify: Filing for a Modification to Your Prior Order
Your divorce lawyer can file a motion to modify your prior order to allow you the right to relocate with children after divorce. Filing for a modification to your prior order creates a new suit in the court, a similar process to your original divorce or custody case. Even if you agree with the other parent about modifying parental rights and duties, you cannot modify your prior court order without filing the motion to modify.
Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake can represent you and file your motion to modify your prior court order, regarding relocating with children after divorce. Attorney Barrows is an experienced divorce lawyer for modifications in Denton County and Tarrant County, Texas.
Child Custody Relocation Laws in Texas
In a Texas divorce and custody cases, parental rights and duties are assigned to parents as conservators and have possession and access rights and schedules. In the divorce decree stating the rights and duties of parents, one may have the exclusive and possibly unlimited right to establish the primary residence of the child. That person with unlimited exclusive rights may be able to relocate where they so choose, and it seems the other parent may not be able to say anything about it.
However, the parent who does not possess that exclusive right to establish the child’s residence can always file suit to ask the court to modify its order and either set restrictions or change the terms of the parents' respective rights and duties.
When issues affecting a child are at stake, the court can receive testimony and other evidence regarding the best interests of the child. Relocating with children after divorce in Texas, when it means modifying court orders, can come down to weighing all the best interest factors set forth in the Texas family code.
A child’s best interests win over an increase in pay, in other words, the child’s stable environment, contact with family and a thriving environment should not be upset unless there are significant circumstances.
Parental Relocation with Children in State or Out of State
A few issues come up when considering relocating with children after divorce, out of Texas, more than 100 miles, or in the next county. A trip from Southlake to Rockwall may be a burden to some, who otherwise might agree to travel to Oklahoma City to get their kids for their weekend, or whatever they have worked out. But what if the relocation is to California and you fear you are rarely going to be able to afford to exercise visitation time.
Psychology Today offers a useful article, Moving to a New Town: The Impact on Kids
Another recent trend we see is people moving to Texas from other states and both the primary parent and kids move, as well as the other parent. In these instances a suit can be filed with the Texas court in the county where the child’s residency is established, to give jurisdiction to the court here in Texas. The court that issues your divorce decree and parental rights and duties is the court of what is called original jurisdiction, over the parties and the child.
What to Consider When Deciding Whether to Relocate with Children after Divorce
You should consult with experienced child custody and divorce lawyers if you face opposition in relocating with children after divorce in Texas, and Leslie Barrows can help. You may be able to approach the other parent with an offer, in which everyone gets what they want and the children are happy and remain well adjusted. You might otherwise be faced with a suit where evidence is presented and witnesses testify, as the court weighs the standard best interest of the child factors to rule on whether there is a modification of the custody orders or restrictions added or lifted.
Psychological experts and evaluators can become involved in contested modification suits. A psych study can be focused on important elements of parents and any child affected by a relocation. If for example, your son or daughter has specific accommodation requirements with schools, medical, mental health, and related professionals and services. Divorce lawyers experienced in custody modification trials create client-tailored strategies to control litigation and get to the best result.
Divorce lawyers like Leslie Barrows will tell you what you are up against if you want to change or challenge your right or the other parent’s right to relocate. You should be prepared to weigh all the factors you would ask the court to consider when evaluating the costs and benefits of relocating with children after divorce. When you consult with your lawyer about child custody modifications you can better appreciate how to be prepared.
Child Custody Lawyer Leslie Barrows Can Help You with Relocating With Children After Divorce
Leslie Barrows is the founding divorce lawyer at the Barrows Firm. Leslie and her team of talented trial attorneys work with families in conflict over parenting and facing tough challenges when the best opportunities mean moving with children. Contact the Barrows Firm in Southlake, serving families in Tarrant County and Denton County and are available at (817) 481-1583.
Protective Orders in Texas for Family Violence and Domestic Violence Regardless of Filing for Divorce
Protective Orders in Texas: You Do Not Need to be in a Divorce
If you meet the legal conditions required for a Texas Court to issue a protective order, regardless of whether you are married to the other person or are married and have not otherwise filed for divorce. There are requirements that must be satisfied before the Court may issue a protective order. The conditions of protective orders in Texas are serious, and if you violate protective orders in Texas for family violence and domestic violence, you can end up in jail and face a variety of consequences.
People applying for protective orders in Texas for family violence and domestic violence, when they are concerned with their safety and the safety of their children, can file for a protective order on an ex-parte, emergency basis, when appropriate, so the other person does not know about it until the court issues the order.
Texas family law regarding protective orders for family violence and domestic violence is complex and involves a variety of moving parts that can affect people differently based on the facts of their situation.
Seeking exclusive possession of the marital residence? Read the Barrows Firm blog article, Kicking Your Spouse Out of the House in Texas.
Not Married, or Not Ready to File for Divorce?
All over Texas, there are people living together in all different types of relationships. Some are married and living together, while others are unmarried and living together with or without children. While common-law marriages can be established, some people do not wish to be married and continue in their relationships as singles.
Married may have a variety of reasons they do not want to get a divorce, although they need a protective order. For example, a spouse battling disease and addiction might need professional help. A strong spouse who wants to make sure the other gets the help they need may seek a protective order to temporarily remove the other from the house. While you usually can’t force your spouse to get help, you can use the Court to protect yourself and your children if necessary.
The National Domestic Violence Hotline is a great resource. Call the hotline 1-800-799-7233.
Qualifying for a Protective Order in Texas for Family Violence and Domestic Violence
Protective orders in Texas are serious. The consequences of violating them are serious. Asking a court to order exclusive possession of a residence is serious. Because protective orders are serious, there are specific legal requirements and findings the Court must make in order to issue protective orders in Texas for family violence and domestic violence.
Call attorney Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake, Texas if you need a protective order in Texas. She can advise and represent you on your rights and the process. (817) 481-1583.
The safety of people and children are the focus on most applications for protective orders in Texas for family violence and domestic violence. Allegations of family violence and domestic violence are set forth in the application which states the nature of the relationships between the individuals and what happened. After a hearing on the application, the Court may make its findings and enter the protective order.
Contents of Protective Orders in Texas for Family Violence and Domestic Violence
A Texas Court issuing a protective order has the discretion to prohibit someone from engaging in certain conduct. Most protective orders state that one of the parties must stay away from others protected in the order. The order can grant exclusive possession of a residence. The order can also require another to pay for the support of another party or a child, and the possession and access to that child may also be ordered. Possession of certain property, such as a vehicle can also be contained in a protective order in Texas.
Requirements in the protective order in certain circumstances can be the completion of family violence prevention programs as well as orders to consult with mental health and other relevant professionals. The individual may also be prohibited from possessing a firearm. They may be ordered not to engage with people or go near them or their place of business, school, or home.
What Happens if Someone Violates a Protective Order
A trip to jail may be the immediate result of the violation of protective orders in Texas for family violence and domestic violence. For example, if you have an active protective order against the other person and they show up at your home, work, or simply follow you into a grocery store, you can dial 911 and the person violating the protective order can be arrested and brought before the judge.
Remember that a protective order is a powerful court order, but at the end of the day, a court order cannot stop a bullet. In too many tragic cases, an angry spouse or significant other goes after the one who gets a protective order issued against them and it ends up tragically, including great bodily harm or death.
In April 2019, officers responded to a residence in Watauga, for a 911 call. The woman who obtained a protective order was found dead in her home. The offender recently served with the order, himself died from a gunshot wound to the chest, killed by police. Read the article, Fort Worth man killed aiming gun at Watauga police officers is identified.
Duration and Modification of a Protective Order
Generally, a protective order may remain effective for up to two years. Unless otherwise stated in the order, the second year after the issuance date would be the termination of protective orders in Texas for family violence and domestic violence.
Based on further circumstances, a protective order can be modified to exclude anything that could be included and to include elements that originally were not ordered. For example, the original protective order might be modified to apply to new circumstances.
Southlake Divorce Lawyer Leslie Barrows Can Help You with Protective Orders for Family Violence and Domestic Violence (817) 481-1583
When your safety or the safety of your child is endangered, you should get help immediately. If you are in the threat of immediate harm, dial 911. To get protective orders in Texas for family violence and domestic violence, to keep someone away, and prevent them from contacting you, married or not, and divorcing or not, call Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake for help.
Divorcing with Children 106: Back to School Conflict
Back to School Conflict in Divorce and Custody Cases
August and September are busy months in divorce and family law, and suits affecting the parent-child relationship. Kids going back to school can lead to disputes between soon to be ex-spouses. In a newly filed divorce, the school year might start before the parties have a chance to have their Temporary Orders Hearing. The Court’s Temporary Orders are used to determine where kids will live and go to school. Your divorce and child custody attorney may be able to help resolve preliminary issues like where the kids will go to school. Back to school conflict comes in many forms.
After a divorce, co-parents might also have issues about school decisions. Many co-parents are named joint managing conservators and have equal rights to certain decisions about the children, and one may be ordered the exclusive right to designate the child’s primary residence. A parent can file a modification case, asking the court to rule in their favor, considering the best interests of the child.
Which district is one conflict, and another is the choice of public, private, or a homeschool option. These disputes can arise when something different is happening in the school, or when the child is not progressing as expected. When behavior and performance are at issue, counselors, mental health professionals, and guardians ad litem are used to help the court resolve back to school conflict.
Call Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake for back to school issues when divorcing with children. A mother of three school-aged boys, Leslie is involved in community schools and appreciates parents’ concerns about the best interests of their children. Call Leslie at (817) 481-1583.
Which Parent Has Exclusive Rights to Designate the Child’s Primary Residence?
Determining which parents can determine where a child will live and go to school is a common dispute in divorce. Especially here in Tarrant and Denton Counties, it is easy to find parents living in different school districts and in different counties. The Court considers factors and the situation of the child and their parents. Issues involving conservatorship and possession and access (otherwise called custody and visitation).
One of the conservators is designated with the exclusive right to determine the primary residence of the child. Every divorce and custody case is unique. The Courts hear arguments from the parties about several factors that can be weighed in making its determination. Factors include the age, developmental status, needs, and best interests of the child. The circumstances of the managing conservator and parent named possessory conservator may also be considered along with other factors.
Where parents live 100 apart from one another, there are additional details in the Family Code regarding rights of conservators.
You might also like our recent blog article, Divorcing with Children 103: 50/50 Equal Access Possession Schedules.
Disputes About Where Will Kids Go to School
Parents want the best educational experiences and opportunities for their children. The development of children, the quality of their education and extracurricular opportunities are top priorities for parents. When one parent has issues with the in-district school where the primary parent and child reside can become the center of disagreement. For example, there could be performance or behavior issues at school. Those issues can lead to modification cases and litigation.
During the original divorce or suit affecting the parent-child relationship, there may be disputes over conservatorship as it matters to school choice. These issues can involve what type of school the parents want the children to attend. Where public versus private school choices has been common for years, conflict over homeschooling may also be at issue.
Read Kids, Divorce, and School Success for some tips to keep the focus on the kids and leave egos at the door.
You might also like, How Does Changing Schools Affect Children?
Resolving Back to School Conflict Before or Early in the School Year
Whether during your original divorce case or you are in a post-decree modification suit, the Court will hear arguments and evidence about school issues and what would be in the best interests of the child. If a dispute arises, it is a good idea to bring it to a mediator or to the court before or very early in the school year.
Weighing the arguments for where the child should go to school, the best interests of the child may also value the status quo and avoiding disruption. Kids do well when they have safety and stability. Being bounced all over school districts and among public and private schools can be more disruptive than helpful.
What is in the Best Interests of the Child?
Courts use the best interests of the child factors and standard when making decisions in divorce and family law cases involving child custody. These factors focus on a safe environment for a child. Anything that may threaten a child’s safe environment can be used to argue for a modification case.
Assisting the court in making determinations may be court-appointed evaluators, guardians ad litem and psychological experts. The hearings and court trials involved in litigating parenting issues such as school choice can be significant. Witnesses and evidence are organized and offered to prove allegations involving children, residential and school issues.
Call Leslie Barrows for Advice About Back to School Conflict (817) 481-1583
If back to school brings up issues involving your divorce or children, call the Barrows Firm in Southlake. Make an appointment to talk to attorney Leslie Barrows to learn your rights and options in divorce and custody cases. Whether you need to file for divorce or need a modification of your current divorce decree and parenting plan, the Barrows Firm attorneys, paralegals and support staff are there to help. Get ahead of back to school conflict with the help of the Barrows Firm.
You May be Eligible for a Child Support Modification
Texas Child Support Guideline Increase and Child Support Modification
You may qualify for a child support modification. The Texas child support guideline cap increases on September 1, 2019. The Texas legislature voted to increase the cap for maximum monthly child support. The new rate for child support is $1,840 per child, a cap increase of $130 monthly for one child. The new maximum cap is $9,200 monthly. You may consult with attorney Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake for advice about your eligibility for a child support modification.
The Texas Family Code determines the application of the child support guidelines to a child support obligor’s monthly net resources. Net resource calculations are also in the Texas Family Code. There are maximum caps on the amount of child support an obligor may be ordered to pay. So whether the obligor’s monthly net resources exceed $9,200, this is the most they can be ordered to pay.
In most child support situations, a withholding order is entered and processed so that the amount of monthly child support payments are automatically withheld from the pay of the child support obligor. There are all kinds of financial and employment circumstances that can affect the amount of child support and how it is collected and disbursed for the best interest of the child.
Know that child support is ordered regardless of whether the parents of the child are married. Establishing paternity is necessary for a Court to order a parent to be a child support obligor who will pay monthly support for the child.
Leslie Barrows is a divorce and family law attorney for child support modifications for those who may be eligible. Call Leslie at the Barrows Firm in Southlake to learn if you may qualify for a child support modification. (817) 481-1583.
Texas Child Support Obligors Pay Child Support
When a divorce with children, one of the parents may be ordered to pay child support for the care of the needs of the parties’ children. The Texas child support guidelines are used to calculate the child support obligor’s monthly net resources available to pay child support. For one child, the child support is 20 percent of the obligor’s monthly net resources. For two children, support is 25 percent and for three children child support is 30 percent. If you have four children, support is 35 percent and for five, six or more children the maximum is 40 percent of the obligor’s monthly net resources.
The Texas Attorney General’s website has a section dedicated to child support in Texas. In their “Child Support Interactive” online tool, custodial and noncustodial parents can log in and find information about their case status, history, payment records, court dates, and personal contact information.
Child Support Increases $130 Monthly to $1,840 Maximum for One Child
Using the new maximum amount of monthly net resources that can be ordered to pay child support ($9,200 monthly), 20 percent of the maximum amount equals $1,840 monthly. The current maximum amount of child support for one child is $1,710, which is 20 percent of the current maximum monthly cap of $8,550. The new guideline amounts are effective for child support orders entered on or after September 1, 2019, the effective date of the new guidelines as signed into law by the Texas legislature.
Monthly Net Resources Greater than $9,200
The monthly net resources cap is the maximum amount of child support an obligor can be ordered to pay. So no matter how much the obligor’s monthly net resources are, the maximum amount they can ever be ordered to pay will be $9,200 monthly. This is an increase of the current guideline cap of $8,550 which will remain the maximum amount until the increase takes effect on September 1, 2019.
Modification Suits for Increasing Child Support
You will not get an automatic child support modification, even if you are eligible. Call Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake for a consultation to determine your eligibility for a child support modification. Attorney Barrows can file a modification case, asking the Court to increase your monthly child support. Increases in child support in a modification suit may be a function of changes in the income of the net resources of the child support obligor as well as the increase in the monthly child support caps.
The Texas Legislature Increases the Child Support Guideline Cap
The Texas legislature regularly considers and votes on increases in the Texas child support guideline caps in monthly net resources available for an obligor to pay child support. In Texas, these caps are considered for increases every six years. The Consumer Price Index is determined by the United States Department of Labor. The Consumer Price Index numbers are used by the state legislators in calculating updated child support numbers and the maximum cap.
Leslie Barrows is an Attorney for Increasing Child Support
Leslie Barrows is a divorce and family law attorney for child support modifications. Attorney Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake will advise you if you qualify for a modification case. A modification for increasing child support is a new case in family law and when you meet with a Barrows Firm attorney you will learn what to expect from start to finish.
The Barrows Firm in Southlake can help you with a case in Denton County or in Tarrant County with a child support modification when you call them at (817) 481-1583.
Divorcing with Children 105: How to Prepare for Court
Tips on How to Prepare for Court when Divorcing with Children
Learn how the divorce process works and always prepare for court. When divorcing with children, knowing what to expect is the key to being prepared for negotiation and litigation. When you meet with your divorce attorney or talk to one of the paralegals or staff at the office, make sure you understand what we are doing so we can best help you. We do not expect you to be a divorce or child custody expert. The more you understand the process and substance of your case, the better you can prepare for court when divorcing with children.
Actively participate in divorce and custody negotiations. You are the one who will be living with the outcome of mediating, negotiating and litigating children’s issues and matters of money and property. For example, if you are fighting for the house, are you sure you will be able to maintain it? As your divorce and child custody attorneys, we can give you advice about your rights and obligations, but we are not the ones who will live with your decisions every day. Being prepared for court means being prepared to make decisions you can live with long-term.
Focus on your kids and decrease emotional reactivity. Your opposing party and opposing counsel may make you angry. Your ability to control your emotions and shut your anger down gives you power. When you have power over yourself and your emotions, you are in the best position to focus on your children and make them feel safe and secure.
For Divorce in Texas, call Attorney Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583
Leslie Barrows and the Barrows Firm Prepare You for Court
Leslie and her team let you know what information and documents they need to represent you. When preparing your discovery responses, be as thorough as possible. The more accurate information you share with your divorce lawyer, the better they can anticipate and handle problems that may arise, such as attacks on your character from the opposing party.
The Barrows Firm website is full of blog articles and podcasts, searchable on the website by topic. Every divorce and child custody case is unique. Some cases involve extensive discovery and temporary orders hearings, and others may not. If you do have a question and are on the Barrows Firm website you can find some direction.
Managing your divorce and custody negotiation and litigation strategy is an important part of the preparation for mediation, hearings, and court trials. Sometimes your opponent may be asking for more than you think they deserve, and it’s all about leverage for settlement. Your opponent’s attorney may be the one driving the bus in a different direction you would have expected. Leslie Barrows has been practicing divorce and family law in Tarrant and Denton Counties for many years and she knows what to expect and how to best prepare her clients for what may happen during their case.
Insights About Child Custody Options in Texas
There is a trend toward shared parenting, also known as 50/50 custody in Texas. There are several states that start with an equal parenting time model. Note that while people say “custody” they really are talking about parenting time with their children. 50/50 is always an option for parents who negotiate and settle on an agreed parenting plan. If you and the other parent can get along and co-parent well, this may be a great option for your family.
If there is no agreed parenting plan, the court appoints one party as having exclusive rights to designate primary residence and the other right to possession. In these cases, the standard possession orders adopted by the court in your county will apply.
Here is additional information about the standard possession order and parenting time.
The Role of a Child Custody Evaluator in Texas
You or the opposing party can request the Court order child custody evaluation. Working well with the evaluator is important to prepare for court. Leslie Barrows can help you prepare your expectations of a child custody evaluator process when divorcing with children.
Be prepared for the judge to give great weight to the recommendations of the custody evaluator. Of course, the evaluator’s report can be challenged when necessary. What is most important to the court making findings for child custody and parenting time is what is in the best interest of the child. It is in a child’s best interest to have good relationships with both parents, without abuse, neglect, or parental alienation.
The Tarrant County, Texas Domestic Relations Office offers additional detailed information about custody evaluations.
Being Prepared for Expert Psychologists in Texas Custody Hearings and Trials
When a parent’s credibility and parenting ability is challenged, an expert psychologist may be appointed. Their goal is to focus on honesty and integrity, and their role in examining a parent seeking custody and parenting time. This is not routine, but it does happen in high-conflict custody cases.
Preparing to respond to the examiner's questions can be a challenge. It may seem like the questions are designed to trick, attack or otherwise put you in a bad light. Sometimes what they are testing is how you respond to that type of questioning and not the substance of the questions themselves. Attorney Barrows may cross-examine the expert psychologist about their results if necessary. How to prepare for court is being prepared to put your best foot forward, especially when experts psychologists may be involved.
Contact Attorney Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake
Leslie Barrows and her team of divorce lawyers and paralegals know how much is at stake in your case. Your family matters and it matters to Leslie and the Barrows Firm. To learn more about your rights and options and how to prepare for what may lie ahead, call the Barrows Firm in Southlake and learn how to prepare for court when divorcing with children at (817) 481-1583.
Social Media in Divorces and Modifications: Dos and Don'ts
How Social Media is Used in Divorces and Modifications
In Texas divorces and modifications, social media comes up frequently. As your family lawyer is working to negotiate and litigate the claims in your petitions, the evidence is necessary to prove those allegations may come from social media. In one example, time-stamped direct messages can be used to prove what was said between people. In another example, pictures and videos can be introduced as evidence regarding parenting and character.
What is most current and relevant may be more persuasive than something from many years ago. Common sense applies and can talk to the attorney representing you in your divorce or modification case. Here at the Barrows Firm, Southlake Divorce Lawyer, Leslie Barrows, and her team are used to high-stakes cases where social media becomes involved. When you call and have a consultation with attorney Barrows you can talk to her about your concerns about social media in divorces and modifications.
Call Attorney Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583.
Only Positive Status Updates
Avoid making social media posts about your divorce or modification case. Also, do not post any information about yourself that could be used in your case. Especially when child custody is disputed, you should be cautious on social media in divorces and modification cases.
Drawing attention to our business can seem harmless but it can get overwhelming. During divorces and modifications, you should do whatever is possible to reduce anxiety and stay focused and centered on making good decisions. Especially when your children are involved, keeping a positive attitude and keeping your head held high is important.
Don’t Assume Everything is Private – Safety First
With many social media and communication networks, you should never assume anything you say is ultimately secured. For example, you may be on private group pages your spouse or ex is not a member of, but others who might know them and share your content.
It is a good idea to assume at least someone on your social media is not who they say they are. We frequently hear about people claiming their pages were hacked, and don’t accept a new request from them. The person behind a fake page could be anyone, so don’t say anything on social media you don’t want your judge, lawyer, and opposing counsel to see all your social media posts in divorces and modifications.
Family violence victims should be particularly careful with social media, to avoid letting the other know where you are. Something as simple as being tagged in another picture could tip someone off as to your whereabouts. If you can, adjust all your settings so you must first approve something like a photo tag.
See this important article: How to Avoid Being Stalked on Social Media.
Being Humble and Maintaining the Status Quo on Social Media in Divorces and Modifications
Oversharing can hurt you. Pictures of vacations, new purchases, and social gatherings with certain people can cause unnecessary conflict and drama that could affect your divorce or modification case. This tip applies to new relationships. Advertising a new person you are dating can become a problem, either in your divorce or well after if you have a modification case.
People can take things the wrong way. What may be a simple selfie with a colleague at a networking event, could look like something else to others who know you are in a divorce or modification case. The last thing you need is a rumor mill buzzing and misinformation sharing in divorces and modifications.
Keeping Kids Out of Your Divorce, Modification or Enforcement Case
Avoid talking badly to your spouse or ex, or talking badly about them. Something as simple as mentioning what the other is saying or doing on Facebook or Instagram can upset your kids. They don’t want to see you upset while they are trying to make sure they feel safe and everything is going to be okay.
People find all kinds of ways to use social media to gain an advantage as the preferred parent, in court, and at home. With social media, we only get a snapshot of what is happening. Whether it is you or the other parent, it is best to steer clear of anything that can upset people.
For these reasons, some people decide to either go offline completely or use social media only sparingly. You should be cautious about what you delete, however, especially if there is a temporary order addressing social media.
Avoiding the Court Ordering a Review of Your Social Media
If social media posts become a disputed matter of evidence in your divorce or modification case, the opposing counsel can ask the Court to order you to turn over information on social media for review. Asking for court orders for social media is something that requires an experienced divorce and family law attorney who can best advise and negotiate on your behalf so your best interests and the best interests of your children remain the focus.
Use OurFamilyWizard to communicate with the other parent, and to share and save information and updates. By not using direct messenger apps you keep everything in one place where you already know the attorneys and judge can see what is said and shared.
You may like our blog about the features and benefits of using Our FamilyWizard, Divorcing with Children 104: Using Our Family Wizard.
Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake for Divorce and Modification Advice and Representation. Our Team Helps You Through the Process and Keeps You Informed. Call us at (817) 481-1583.
Many families turn to the Barrows Firm when they have high conflict divorce, child custody, and modification needs. Leslie Barrows and her team of attorneys, paralegals, and staff are focused on families. With additional questions about social media dos and don’ts during divorces and modifications, you may also contact us through our website.
Leslie Barrows Featured in Society Life
Congratulations to Attorney Leslie for being featured in the July 2019 edition of Society Life Magazine. Read the great article here!
Kicking Your Spouse Out of the House in Texas
The Barrows Firm Helps When You Need Your Spouse Out of the House in Texas Divorce
Your spouse cheated on you and now you want them gone. You call the locksmith and have the locks changed. When your soon-to-be ex comes home, they call the police because you locked them out. You think you are doing the right thing but now you are in trouble. The judge in your divorce is not amused by your engaging in self-help. Don’t get yourself involved in a mess because you jumped the gun. There is a proper procedure and judges have their own requirements of what is necessary to affect a kick-out order restricting their access to the marital residence. Note that orders to get your spouse out of the house apply to domestic living situations and marriage and divorce are not required to qualify for relief from the Court.
In a Texas divorce, an order to get your spouse out of the house can be the relief requested in your application for a protective order. Most judges require a protective order when a party seeks a kick-out order. A protective order is a serious matter. There must be more than dislike and hurt feelings to seek a protective order. The consequences of violating a protective order are also serious, including potential time in jail. If you do need a kick-out order to get your spouse out of the house, Leslie Barrows at the Barrows Firm can help you.
The divorce lawyers at Barrows Firm in Southlake, Texas are experienced in high conflict divorce and child custody cases. In cases where domestic or family violence occurs, the Barrows Firm attorneys fight zealously for clients and the best interests of children. And, at times we defend against opposing parties seeking protective orders when they appear only to use the system, trying to gain an advantage.
Applying for a Protective Order Specifically Requesting an Order to Get Your Spouse Removed From the House
When an application for a protective order is filed, the court hears evidence about where family violence has occurred or is likely to occur in the future. Sometimes both parties apply for protective orders and the Court can issue both with appropriate conditions. In some instances, parties can work towards conflict resolution by agreeing to the terms of protective orders, to be approved by the Court.
When applying for the issuance of a protective order, the party seeking the order asks for specific relief, including what is referred to as a kick-out order, to get your spouse out of the house. The court may grant your request to remove your spouse from the house and order your spouse to leave.
Note that you do not need to own the home to get a kick-out order. Renters absolutely have rights to seek the Court’s order to remove your spouse. Also, note that an order kicking your spouse out of the house is issued on a temporary basis and does not otherwise affect title to the property. Even if only one of the spouses is named on the title, they can still be removed.
The ACLU Women’s Rights Project published a paper about Domestic Violence: Protective Orders and the Role of Police Enforcement
Excluding the Spouse from the Home with an Ex Parte Protective Order.
Ex parte means without notice. In most divorce procedures the other party is entitled to notice of motions and hearings, so they may be present in Court for any actions that may affect their rights. Ex Parte protective orders can be issued on a temporary basis. Ex parte orders are temporary to prevent the threat of immediate harm. A temporary order is valid for 20 days, and the parties may both appear at a hearing if the one who sought the protective order wants it to be extended.
The Texas Family Code addresses kicking your spouse out of the house in a section about exclusion from the residence. The application must include an affidavit of the facts and circumstances why the spouse must be excluded. The Court must find that within the past 30 days the person to be excluded committed family violence against another member of the household. Additionally, there must be a finding a danger that the person to be excluded is likely to commit family violence against another in the household, again.
The hearing for an order excluding a party from the residence follows all the applicable rules of Texas family law and procedure. Witnesses may be presented to present evidence as well as officers reports and testimony regarding incidences of family violence and the facts supporting an application to kick the other spouse out of the marital home.
The National Domestic Violence Hotline – Get Help Today
When you need an ex-parte protective order, and/or an order excluding your spouse from the home, call the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583.
Orders to Kick Your Spouse Out of the House and Law Enforcement
An order excluding your spouse from the residence, a kick-out order, is enforceable by law enforcement. When a kick-out order is entered and the other party is served with the order, they must comply. If they do not leave the house as ordered by the Court, law enforcement can be involved to remove them.
If the excluded spouse returns to the house during the enforceable time identified on the order, the law may be called, and the person could be arrested for violating the terms of the Court order. A judge may extend the terms of protective orders and orders excluding others from the residence, especially when the one violates the order.
Divorce Attorneys at the Barrows Firm Assist with Applying for and Defending Protective Orders and Orders to Get Your Spouse Out of the House
Leslie Barrows is the founder of the Barrows Firm in Southlake, Texas. She and her team of talented divorce lawyers help families and children who become victims of family violence. When you need to file divorce and need your spouse removed from the home, the Barrows Firm can help. If you are the one accused of family violence by your spouse seeking to kick you out of the home, the Barrows Firm can help. Call today for a consultation at the Barrows Firm to learn your rights and options regarding protective orders and orders to get your spouse out of the house in Texas.
Why Starting a Divorce in June is Popular in Texas
Being Organized, Minimizing Disruption, Starting a Divorce in June
Considering divorce? You are not alone. Marriage and divorce statistics show that every year there are tens of thousands of divorce cases filed in Texas courts. Some divorces arise out of tragic situations and others are just a function of parents of children who have grown apart and want to go their own ways. Regardless of the reason, there are always more popular times to divorce and starting a divorce in June is a plan for many divorcing couples with minor children.
You and your spouse may have decided together that you both want to divorce. If your divorce is mostly uncontested, you and your spouse agree on most of the divorce issues. For example, you all might agree on 50/50 property division and shared custody with a standard possession schedule.
What if you are not on the same page and are preparing for a messy divorce? Again, for people with children, not disrupting their progress at school is important to parents. If the divorce is going to be bad, and the kids are going to be upset, starting divorce in June can help take away the sting before school starts in the fall.
Attorney Leslie Barrows is well known in Tarrant and Denton County for being compassionate yet tough divorce and custody lawyer. Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake for a consultation at (817) 481-1583.
Starting Divorce While Children are Away at Summer Camp
June is a popular month for divorce if you and your spouse know your kids will be away at summer camp. Some parents who agree to get divorced may want some space to go their own way when the divorce is filed and served.
Consider the children’s reactions when they return, if they are away. Imagine the surprise a child might have, returning from camp and mom or dad moved out!
There are so many great summer camps in the Texas Hill Country!
Scheduling a Temporary Orders Hearing Before Kids go Back to School
While a Temporary Orders Hearing is not mandatory, it is an element of most divorce cases where there are issues in dispute. If everything is otherwise agreed, for a Temporary Orders Hearing there is no need. That said, most divorces require Temporary Orders, to initially determine who lives where and who pays for what. It is important to take the Temporary Orders Hearing seriously because it is common for the terms of the Temporary Orders to carry over at the Final Trial and be incorporated into the divorce decree.
Here is another blog article on our site that touches upon Temporary Orders Hearings and other similar issues – Divorcing with Children 102: Child Custody.
Tips to Know About Getting a Divorce in Texas:
- Texas is a No-Fault Divorce State;
Texas divorce and child custody law is found in the Texas Family Code. Our family law code in Texas is unique and notably different from other states. While you do have an option to plead a fault ground for a Texas divorce and have a jury trial on some issues, Texas is a no-fault divorce state. The no-fault ground is called “insupportability,” and the court may grant a divorce without regard to fault when the court finds the marriage to be insupportable. Discord or conflict of personalities that destroys the marital relationship and prevents reconciliation is all the must be found by the court.
- Texas Does Not Recognize Legal Separation;
In Texas, you are married until you are divorced. This is a good issue to illustrate to new Texas residents married in other states, how divorce and family law is different here in Texas. There is no legal separation in Texas, it is not recognized. So even if you and your spouse decide to live apart in separate homes, everything you all own together is community property. It does not matter how the property is titled, Texas is a community property state so your property and debts are community until you are divorced.
- Divorces Take Time and Do Not Happen Overnight;
Even in Texas counties where new courts have been added and new judges taking the bench, the court dockets are busy with a significant number of cases. Judges and their courts make every effort to give everyone the time and attention they need to resolve divorce and custody issues for their family, but it takes time. What helps the process is being prepared for hearings, being organized for your lawyer, and taking advantage of opportunities like mediation, to agree on certain issues so everyone can focus on contested matters. Even if everything is uncontested and you start divorce with a comprehensive agreement you still must wait 60 days after a petition is filed for your divorce to be finalized.
- Always Hire an Experienced Lawyer for Divorce and Child Custody;
Especially when child custody is an issue in your divorce, it is in your children’s best interest to hire an experienced divorce and custody attorney to look out for their best interests. Even if there are no minor children and no custody issues, the process of divorce is complex and you are expected to know the law and understand procedure if you attempt to represent yourself or use an attorney who does not know the Texas Family Code. Also, it is important for both you and your spouse to hire separate divorce attorneys. Making sure everything is done correctly and fairly is important.
- How to Save Resources for Your Family and Future Children’s Expenses.
Identify what is really important to you and your family. If you have a serious problem with the other parent having shared custody, fight for it. If you just want to punish the other person for failing to meet your expectations, put your pride in your pocket and move on. How you approach divorce sets the tone for future communications and co-parenting. Take advantage of mediation and out-of-court settlement options. Save the important things for hearings and trial. Turn over your documents in discovery. Hiding from or disturbing the process only leads to more time and resources that are better used paying for your kid’s college and future expenses.
Interested in Starting a Divorce in June? Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake (817) 481-1583.
The Barrows Firm attorneys in Southlake can help you with a divorce in Tarrant County and in Denton County. The first step is putting your trust in an attorney and a firm with which you feel comfortable. Our Texas divorce and custody attorneys have years of experience working with all kinds of families and challenging cases. We create the right strategy for you and your family, making the best interests of your children a top priority.
Call us at the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583 to schedule a consultation for starting a divorce in June.
Grandparent Custody in Texas: Conservatorship, Guardianship, and Estate Planning
Because Grandparents Are Important to Children’s Lives, Grandparent Custody in Texas is a Frequently Discussed Topic
When children look at their parents, they appreciate that even mom and dad had their own parents. Grandparents help their grandchildren put things into perspective. Grandparents are fascinating to young kids who hear stories from the past and what it was like before modern conveniences and technology. Grandparents also talk to their grandchildren about what life was like when their parents were growing up as children. We hope our children learn the importance of history and culture from grandparents.
You may enjoy this article from Today, The special role of grandparents.
As parents, we often think about whether our own mothers and fathers would step in and take care of our kids if something happened. But what happens when parents are not together? And what happens when one of the parents is in trouble or going through something that prevents them from being there for their kids.
It is natural to look to grandparents and ask if grandparent custody in Texas, or visitation, or guardianship is something to consider. What matters is whether everyone is on the same page when it comes to appointing a grandparent to care for a child, temporarily or permanently. Assuming both biological parents are joint conservators, their parental rights trump those of a grandparent. The issues involved are complex and can require an experienced lawyer who knows divorce, family law and estate and guardianship planning.
Call Leslie Barrows at The Barrows Firm in Southlake, Texas, for legal advice and assistance with grandparent custody or visitation issues. (817) 481-1583.
Grandparent Custody in Texas is a Complex Matter
Judges, divorce lawyers, mental health professionals, and parents can agree that grandparents are important to grandchildren. While it may seem normal for grandparents to be engaged and involved in caring for and helping raise their grandchildren when it comes to legal rights they often fall short. The parents of a child have superior rights to their children and Texas courts set a high bar for grandparents to establish their standing to bring and win cases seeking custody and visitation with grandchildren.
In 2000, the U.S. Supreme Court, in Troxel v. Granville, primarily held that “There is a fundamental right under the Fourteenth Amendment for a parent to oversee the care, custody, and control of a child.” In a nutshell, grandparents’ legal rights are limited, even though courts find that relationships with grandparents are in the best interests of grandchildren.
What about emergencies? Can’t parents use estate planning documents to appoint someone such as a grandparent to care for their children in their absence?
See the Texas Attorney General’s website page about grandparents and senior rights.
Planning for Unforeseeable Grandparent Custody Issues
What would you do if your daughter went missing, in which her husband was a suspect, and your granddaughter had nobody lined up to take care of her? This is what recently happened in San Antonio. The grandparents of the little girl are seeking custody of their granddaughter as her mother, missing since the first of March, is presumed dead.
Because the father is facing an evidence tampering case tied to the disappearance of his wife, he is prohibited from contact with the little girl, a condition of bond.
Among what is alleged is that the only constant in the little girl’s life is her grandmother. However, the grandmother has an uphill battle in any Texas court where grandparent custody and visitation are both possible, but not easily obtained when there is another parent with superior legal rights.
Unexpected Tragedies are Beyond our Control
We buy insurance to cover the unexpected. We get wills and trusts written to serve our directive wishes in our absence. When we go under for surgery we appoint someone we trust to make our medical decisions. Often it is right before a vacation that parents call their lawyer and make sure to update their will and estate planning documents in case anything happens to them.
But what about the unexpected tragedies that don’t occur overseas, the ones that take place right at home? Would we ever expect to be abducted and likely murdered by the other parent? Likely nobody ever said they would become a statistic or a line in a news story about grandparents seeking conservatorship because dad is out of the picture or is otherwise a suspect.
Family Lawyers with Estate Planning Solutions Including Guardianship
Divorce lawyers commonly assist their clients with wills and estate planning after a divorce, to protect the client and their family in the future. When a client comes to meet with an estate planning lawyer, the question of kids comes up. Most of us assume our parents could step in for us on a temporary basis. When it’s a permanent custody or visitation discussion, it can become more complicated.
A guardian, who can be a grandparent, can be appointed to care for your children and receive funds from your estate for their care. In most wills, the guardian is appointed assuming the simultaneous death of both parents. In the case in San Antonio, the whereabouts and life of the mother are unknown and the father is known but barred from contact with the child.
While lawyers can write wills and estate plans to apply to a variety of scenarios, the facts determine what happens. Well-prepared wills and estate planning documents record the maker’s intentions and what hey would want to happen in their absence.
Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake for More Information about Grandparent Custody in Texas
Leslie Barrows and her team of attorneys and paralegals focus on divorce, family law and the guardianship and estate planning issues. When parents divorce and there are custody issues and something happens to one or both parents, we all need to be ready to deal with that situation. Planning ahead when everyone is happy and healthy makes it much easier for families. Call us at The Barrows Frim in Southlake at (817) 481-1583 if you need help and legal advice about grandparent custody in Texas.
Telling Your Spouse You Want A Divorce
How to tell your spouse you want a divorce
Telling your spouse that you want a divorce might be the most difficult thing you will tell someone. Whether you believe your marriage was one that worked well or was a challenge can be irrelevant when people decide that life is short, and they want to move forward on their own. For other married couples a divorce may be the result of abuse, cheating, financial problems and destructive behaviors such as alcohol and drug abuse.
When a spouse wants out of a marriage due to the bad acts of the other, there is often a confrontation and anger is the fuel for divorce. The more difficult situation occurs when one spouse is unhappy and the other is fine and has no idea that a divorce may be on the horizon. How do you tell someone who has done nothing wrong that you want to leave?
Sometimes people just grow apart from one another
When you are young and getting married all that matters is having kids and raising a family. As you and your family grow older there are may also be aging relatives who need care. The amount of effort and self-sacrifice required of many married couples can take its toll. In some marriages, real and deep communication has been non-existent for years and the couple and family seem to operate in their roles on auto-pilot.
The empty nest situation and the loss of an elder can be triggers to people that life is short, and people may want a divorce. The desire to call it quits often results from people simply growing apart. Men and women who get divorced after their kids have grown up and moved on will often tell you that they had a sense for years that one day they would tell the other that they are ready to end the marriage.
Tips on breaking the news that you want to divorce
- The first discussion is likely going to surprise your spouse. There is never a perfect time or place to break the news that you want a divorce. However, there are better situations than others. Communicating in person allows people their range of emotions, which might be best.
- Focus on the idea of remaining friends, just not a married couple. When you do not hate your spouse, and just want to move on from the marriage, let the other know, however cliché, that is you and not them causing the desire to divorce.
- Do not defend or attack; leave the argument points aside. When people hear information, they do not like there is a tendency to argue your points and talk the person out of something. When a spouse is ready to tell the other that they want a divorce, they are probably quite sure of their decision.
- Be honest and clear while remaining firm. It is great to talk about all the good times and proud moments in a marriage and raising a family, but that does not mean people have to stay married. The more open and honest you are about your feelings, the less likely your spouse is going to wonder if there is something else going on.
- Remain open to counseling and saving the marriage. In certain situations, the problems in a marriage can be solved in couples’ counseling. After years people can get in a rut and not see the light between the trees and a good mental health or spiritual counselor can help a couple repair communication breakdowns and repair a neglected relationship.
Will ending the marriage solve perceived problems?
Southlake divorce lawyer and mediator, Leslie Barrows has decades of experience working with clients who want to divorce for a variety of reasons, including simply growing apart from one another. When a marriage has run its course, there is an opportunity to divorce amicably and without causing damage. In other situations where there is a stronger underlying problem, Leslie knows it may be time to suit up for battle and vindication for deeply damaging past wrongs.
If you are considering calling it quits and moving forward in a new direction without your spouse, call The Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583 and Leslie and her staff can help you with all the information and assistance you may need to take next steps.
Summer Possession: Making Plans and Giving Notice
April Deadlines for Summer Possession
In Texas, visitation with children is referred to as the time of possession and access with the child. Do you have a court-ordered parenting plan with a set schedule for possession and access of and with the children? Many people use a Standard Possession Schedule Order. A Standard Possession Schedule allows both parents to have possession of the children whenever both co-parents agree.
However, when the parents do not agree on when each will exercise their possession time, and they cannot flexibly agree on schedules, the Standard Possession Schedule Order applies and the parents should follow what is stated in their order. Note that some parents may have a custom possession and access schedule which also allows for one on one discussion and exchange of possession times.
Summer Possession is what we call the extended period of time the non-primary parent has possession with the child during the summer, and the standard order designates July as the time of possession for the non-primary parent. The standard order designates 30 days of extended possession to parents who live within 100 miles of the other parent. Co-parents living more than 100 miles apart use a longer extended time of 42 days, as set forth in the standard order.
Do I have to use all my days in one lump sum? What if I have days left over? For answers to specific questions, call Leslie Barrows at The Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583.
Avoiding Enforcement Actions for Standard Holiday Possession
Whether your divorce is still pending or you are already divorced and co-parenting, Summer Possession plans that fall apart can lead to enforcement actions in court. When making plans for Summer Possession we may be booking camping trips, airline flights, and vacation rentals. When we are locked into a fixed schedule we rely on the other parent to honor their commitments.
Here’s a Great Summer Camp List: Summer Camps in Texas
Sometimes, despite best efforts, and without intention to cause problems, plans can fall apart. Before we run to court, it is best to work together and negotiate a resolution to Summer Possession planning issues. We can help you at the Barrows Firm if you have a trip planned and need to resolve a co-parenting conflict.
Giving Written Notice of Summer Plans
Making plans for the summer can be easy when you keep organized and on top of busy schedules in the family. Challenges in creating schedules that work for everyone involved means spotting conflicts in advance and being flexible to changes in plans. There are plenty of situations in which outside factors influence schedules and plans beyond our control. For example, if the other parent wants to make Summer Possession Plans for July 15 through August 15 and then they notified they have a work responsibility making it impossible to exercise their extended possession as planned.
The problem with making plans is that people rely on those plans, sometimes to their detriment. If the other parent makes plans with you and has to break them, they fall back on the default provision in their possession schedule.
Giving written notice is required for parents who want to exercise Summer Possession outside the dates stated in their order, assuming one exists. If there ends up being a problem with Summer Possession Plans and an enforcement action occurs, the judge will likely ask to see the written notice sent, communicating Summer Possession plans. The notice must be given before the deadlines of April 1st for non-custodial parents and April 15th for custodial parents.
Sometimes as kids get older they don’t want to spend a whole month with the non-custodial parent. Read this Reddit post and comments about co-parenting and Summer Possession as the kids get older: My kids don't want to spend the entire summer with me, my ex insists that I should take them.
April 1st Written Notice Deadline for Non-Custodial Parents
If you are the non-custodial (non-primary) parent and you want to make Summer Possession Plans for your 30 or 42 days you must provide written notice to the custodial (primary) parent by April 1. If your notice is given on time, before the expiration of the deadline, you have the option of splitting up your extended Summer Possession time into two periods of at least seven days each.
When non-custodial parents give Summer Possession notice, they must select times during summer vacation from school. The operable timeframe includes the day after school is dismissed for summer recess and seven days prior to the beginning of the next school year in the fall.
Question: Oh no! I missed the April 1st deadline, what happens?
Answer: You fall back on the Standard Possession Schedule Order and July is your extended month.
April 15th Written Notice Deadline for Custodial Parents
If you are the custodial (primary) parent and you share time of possession with the other parent using a Standard Possession Schedule Order, you may choose a weekend and an extended week of Summer Possession. After the other parent’s deadline to notify you of their Summer Possession plans, you can choose your extra weekend and extended week. Note that the extended week cannot take place during the other parent’s extended possession, which is why these deadlines fall in order, 15 days apart.
What Happens if You Do Not Give Written Notice of Summer Plans
If by chance you fail to give notice to the other parent by the April 1 or 15 deadlines, the Texas Family Code says that whatever is stated in your possession schedule is what controls on summer possession issues. If you have no standard order in place, you have nothing to worry about. However, if the standard order is part of your custody and possession order, July will be your month to have the extra 30 or 42 days with your child. Note, where notice was not given, you cannot split time and your 30 days run consecutively.
Additionally, you are not required to use every single available Summer Possession day, but you should! Parents and children have little time to bond and enjoy adventures and growing up before graduation day comes, and it comes quickly. Also, Summer Possession Plans cannot trump the previously identified dad’s time during Father’s day.
Call the Barrows Firm for Help with Deadlines for Summer Possession (817) 481-1583.
At the Barrows Firm, we understand that despite all the hard work negotiating what seems to be the perfect schedule for possession and access, things can change. When kids grow older and when parents get re-married and introduce new people to the family, conflict can arise quickly.
A custom parenting plan with a possession and access schedule that works for you and your family may handle Summer Possession Plans in a way that works for everyone involved. Call us at the Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583 for help with custody and visitation issues including Summer Possession plans and enforcement or modification actions if you believe that will prevent future problems with scheduling possession and access during summer vacation.
Court-Ordered Alcohol Testing: Soberlink and EtG Testing
Court-Ordered Alcohol Testing Includes Soberlink and the EtG Test
Are you concerned about your spouse's alcohol intake while they are with the children? Although everyone works hard at being a good parent, sometimes alcohol gets in the way. Read about Problems & Effects of Alcoholism on Families & Marriages. When a parent struggles with alcohol use which is sometimes abuse, court-ordered alcohol testing is appropriate and in the best interests of the children. Device and chemical technologies make alcohol testing easier, quicker and more reliable. Parents are also more accountable when instantly automated testing devices like Soberlink are ordered by the Court.
The Court can order you to buy and use the Soberlink remote breathalyzer with facial recognition technology and reporting software. The device works using mobile device technologies to tell the user when to test, verifies their identity with facial recognition software and immediately reports the results of their portable breath test. The Soberlink device tests and reports the user’s BAC. Another option that can test for alcohol for a longer period is called EtG testing.
The court can order EtG testing at Forensic DNA. The “80-hour test” as it is called, alcohol testing for EtG can show any amount of consumed ethyl alcohol for 80 hours or up to five days for chronic drinkers. Forensic DNA Drug & Testing Services in Fort Worth is located at 511 East Weatherford Street, a three-minute walk from the Tarrant County Family Law Center. The EtG tests detect recent alcohol usage more accurately and for a longer period than previous testing technology. EtG alcohol urine tests are ideal for zero-tolerance court-ordered alcohol testing.
Attorney Leslie Barrows is a top-rated family law attorney and she will ask the Court to order alcohol testing with Soberlink and EtG as appropriate. Call the Barrows Firm at (817) 481-1583.
Soberlink Remote Breathalyzer: Court-Ordered Alcohol Monitoring Program
Soberlink is cost-effective. When ordered to participate in the Soberlink program for parenting time only, there is a Level 1 plan beginning at $99 per month for the Basic subscription. There are also monthly Plus and Premium subscriptions for $149 and $199 respectively, offering more features. Premium features include text and email results in real time, unlimited reports on all testing activity for date ranges and more. The Bluetooth (iPhone) and cellular Soberlink devices are sold separately from the monthly subscriptions for $299 and $399.
Watch this Video to See How Soberlink Works
EtG Court-Ordered Alcohol Testing at Forensic DNA
New research in alcohol testing paved the way for EtG testing, answering the question of how to capture evidence of alcohol use while alcohol is otherwise rapidly eliminated through the body. Consider the Court ordered the other not to drink any alcohol during periods of possession and access of the children, and you have reason to suspect they were consuming alcohol early during the weekend, against the Court’s order. Unlike earlier alcohol testing methods, EtG can now detect the presence of consumed alcohol for three to five days depending on consumption habits.
EtG, (Ethyl Glucuronide) is a metabolite of alcohol. EtG is detectable in urine and it is unique in that it does not cause false positive test results. EtG alcohol testing can be performed using hair and nails as well, with a detection window of three months for head or body hair and finger or toenails. EtG is frequently used in court-ordered alcohol testing.
Facial Recognition Technology Confirms Soberlink User Identity
Soberlink uses integrated facial recognition software so to authenticate the device user before and while they use the BAC testing device. The software is adaptable to minor changes in the user’s appearance but, the facial points it measures do not change. There are internal tamper sensors and technology that flags the system if detecting a non-human breath.
Soberlink BAC Results Wirelessly Transmit in Real-Time
When a Soberlink user’s phone reminds them to take the test, it is easy and quick to look at the device and go ahead and test, then review. The results are transmitted in real-time to the contacts established in the device. Soberlink’s cloud-based recovery management software automates the alcohol testing process from start to finish and it can be customized to fit a variety of needs.
Questions About Soberlink Remote Breathalyzer or EtG Testing or Court-Ordered Alcohol Testing? Call the Barrows Firm in Southlake, Texas at (817) 481-1583.
The Barrows Firm serves people and families in and around Southlake, Texas and all over Tarrant County and Denton County. Principal and founder, Leslie Barrows, takes responsible parenting seriously, helping parents concerned about the other’s drinking. The Soberlink device and EtG testing make court-ordered alcohol testing efficient and accountable.
Court-ordered alcohol testing can be easy and tailored to fit the needs of every family concerned with the alcohol use and abuse of the spouse or another parent. Alcohol use can easily become abuse, especially when people are going through emotionally challenging times. Court-ordered alcohol testing does not need to be viewed as a punishment or penalty, rather it can be a useful tool in helping keep someone honest when they know they cannot cheat the system.
Uncontested Divorce in Texas
What is an Uncontested Divorce in Texas?
Is there really such a thing as an uncontested divorce in Texas? When people see signs on the side of the road advertising low rates for an uncontested divorce, it is easy to get confused. There is a misconception that the word “uncontested” refers to whether the couple mutually agrees to be divorced and dissolve the marriage. This misconception often comes from television and movies where characters are focused on whether one will give the other a divorce. In dramatic scenes, one reluctant party finally gives in and signs off on the divorce. While entertaining, this is not an example of an uncontested divorce.
There are some interesting, funny and compelling movies about divorce. Use this link to review IMDb’s collection, Divorce in Films.
Rather, an uncontested divorce is a divorce where the couple has resolved all major issues including child custody, visitation, parenting time and property division. This means much more than husband and wife agreeing to split everything equally and handle custody and visitation on their own. There are several issues that should be addressed, and the parties should be advised of their legal rights under Texas law and the Family Code before making any agreements.
An Agreeing to Divorce is Not the Same as Uncontested Divorce
Texas, like many states, is a no-fault divorce state, where all a husband or wife needs to allege is insupportability, stated in the Texas Family Code as follows: “On the petition of either party to a marriage, the court may grant a divorce without regard to fault if the marriage has become insupportable because of discord or conflict of personalities that destroys the legitimate ends of the marital relationship and prevents any reasonable expectation or reconciliation.[i]”
If one party alleges the marriage should be dissolved, they allege the grounds for dissolution, such as insupportability, in their petition. If that party wants to be divorced, the court will make a finding that the marriage is dissolved. Whether the other party agrees and wants the divorce is not a question of whether the divorce is an uncontested divorce because uncontested refers to all the legal rights and issues involved in dissolving a marriage where children, income, assets, and property are involved.
What Issues Must Be Resolved to Have an Uncontested Divorce?
Child custody and visitation are significant issues in divorce. What may sound good in theory, is more difficult to implement in real life. For example, some parents want to share equal parenting time with their sons and daughters and suggest they will work together without a fixed schedule. Everything may run smoothly, but anything can change. Having a well thought out parenting plan helps answer all the “what if” questions. Child support, medical expenses, and insurance are issues which must be addressed and resolved before you can proceed with an uncontested divorce.
Financial and property issues in a divorce can be the source of conflict. Couples who approach divorce and agree to split everything down the middle may change their mind. There are so many issues involving money and property that people don’t think about until they drill down into the details. It is important to learn your legal rights and duties regarding money and property. Discovery is the process in a divorce, where the parties exchange documents and information about finances, assets, and liabilities. So even if the parties still agree to split everything 50/50, they should be aware of their legal rights and options before proceeding in an uncontested divorce.
Using Mediation to Resolve Issues for an Uncontested Divorce
A Mediated Settlement Agreement is a document identifying the parties in a divorce and their respective award of the divided marital estate. When the parties agree to mediation, they can use the formal dispute resolution process to identify, resolve and confirm how parenting and property will be addressed in the divorce. The result of the mediation process should be a written Mediated Settlement Agreement. It is important to use an experienced divorce lawyer who knows the requirements necessary so that the Mediated Settlement Agreement is enforceable and the party seeking divorce is entitled to judgment.
A Waiver of Service for an Uncontested Divorce
In a typical divorce, the party filing for divorce has the other party served with divorce petition and the affidavit of service is part of the divorce court record. If both the parties who want an uncontested divorce, they may waive the formal requirement of being served. The process of serving someone with divorce papers is all about the court’s right to establish personal jurisdiction over the party listed as a respondent in the divorce petition. Judges hearing petitions to approve uncontested divorces require a waiver of service be filed with the clerk of court before the uncontested divorce may be approved.
A Signed Final Decree of Divorce for an Uncontested Divorce
A final decree of divorce is a formal document containing a list of recitals that identify the requirements for the process of a divorce have been satisfied. The final decree for an uncontested divorce should properly identify the rights and duties of both parties and what will happen with children and property. The final decree indicates that the court has jurisdiction over the parties and the divorce, and that the waiver of service has been filed.
Using the Barrows Firm for Uncontested Divorces in Texas
Getting an uncontested divorce in Texas is a relatively straightforward process when both parties agree on the division of property and parenting rights and duties. Always hire an experienced divorce attorney to prepare, file and present your divorce to the court. The Barrows Firm in Southlake can help you and your husband or wife with an uncontested divorce. Call our office in Southlake to schedule a consultation with Attorney Leslie Barrows to talk about your divorce options and next steps with an uncontested divorce.
[i] Texas Family Code, Grounds for Divorce.
Divorcing with Children 104: Using Our Family Wizard
Families Should be Using Our Family Wizard Software and Apps
The magic of Our Family Wizard (OFW) is not magic at all, rather it is smart scheduling software designed to facilitate communication between parents with shared custody of their children. The shared calendar helps co-parents with visitation swaps, school schedules, and extracurricular events. Using Our Family Wizard is very affordable and parents who use it save money by not needing to go through their divorce lawyer and their office when they can document everything that happens with co-parenting using Our Family Wizard.
When you and the other parent agree to use OFW or the court makes that order, parents in high conflict divorce and family law cases involving child custody can build a working relationship using OFW tools. In real time, parents can use OFW to communicate with an emphasis on being accountable.
Using Our Family Wizard is great because the judge and the lawyers can also view all the communications, so everyone is held to account for their willingness to communicate responsibly and stay focused on the children and their needs. And if you are meeting up to drop off your son or daughter at a certain time and place, the OFW app will record your GPS location and timestamp, avoiding disagreements about pick-ups and drop-offs with the new visitation check-in feature.
Adding Our Family Wizard Language to Your Divorce Decree – Recommended for Many
Southlake area divorce lawyer, Leslie Barrows often talks about the benefits of using Our Family Wizard software for families who do not or cannot communicate. By adding language to your court orders requiring the use of OFW to manage co-parenting, your family can reduce high-conflict situations.
Saying you agree to use the OFW system is one thing, having the language in your Mediated Settlement Agreement and Divorce Decree mandates you and the other parent use OFW to communicate regarding their children. For example, you can state in the court order that the parties are ordered to visit the website, enroll and use the program for at least a one-year subscription.
The Our Family Wizard company offers examples of common order language attorneys can use when parents agree or are ordered to use the program. See some examples of common order language about OFW.
You may also like some of the blog articles in our Divorcing with Children series:
- Divorcing with Children 101: Divorcing with Children Without Anxiety
- Divorcing with Children 102: Child Custody
- Divorcing with Children 103: 50/50 Equal Access Possession Schedules
Watch the OFW Tutorial for Parents
Parents who had been through challenging divorces in past years will be envious of the option for people divorcing with children to use a website like Our Family Wizard to reduce anxiety, increase communication and focus on what is really important, quality one on one time with children. Watch the OFW parent tutorial and learn how this software program can make life easier for you and your family.
The Our Family Wizard Tone Meter
What happens when the other parent is doing or saying something that hits all the right buttons to make you made. If there is a sharp tone to your response, the OFW system will flag your words and ask if you would like to try again and say something nice.
Some judges use the OFW site and can pull up your messages in court. Imagine seeing your angry message along with everyone else in the courtroom. Now imagine the judge finding you in contempt for disregarding their orders. The tone meter can help prevent communication problems turning into higher conflict situations that cost everyone time and resources.
The Our Family Wizard Info Bank
Don’t worry if you can’t remember your son or daughter’s belt size, shirt size or blood type when you use the Our Family Wizard Info Bank to manage private and shared family information. In one organized place, you have everything you need and don’t need to contact the other parent when exercising your own parental rights and duties with your child.
Using the Our Family Wizard Pay Feature for Reimbursable Expenses
Parents can submit their receipts for reimbursable health and medical expenses right on their Our Family Wizard account. Making payments to the other parent is easy using OFWpay™ which uses secure technology for sending and receiving funds. The payments and information transferred cannot be manipulated or changed, another accountability feature offered for Our Family Wizard Users. This reduces the risk that the other parent may misrepresent or confuse others about what money paid is for which expenses.
Families with Fast-Passed Lifestyles are Using Our Family Wizard
Not only divorced parents or parents with sharing custody are using Our Family Wizard software and apps to keep track of shared schedules, expenses, and information. For example, when mom is going out of town for the week and dad needs to get the kids to school, practice and appointments, mom can relax knowing dad has OFW on his side. If you are using Our Family Wizard, share the secret of successful scheduling with your married friends with busy lives.
Qualified Discounts Make Using Our Family Wizard Affordable for All
The Our Family Wizard fee waiver program helps indigent parents and families for whom the annual subscription fee may be a burden. Also, parents who work in public services may receive a half-price discount to an OFW subscription.
The Barrows Firm is Committed to Helping Families Function Well After Divorce and Custody Cases
Leslie Barrows and her team of talented attorneys and paralegals at The Barrows Firm work hard to make sure families are doing well after their case. So much work goes into negotiating and settling divorce and custody cases so that lives are smooth and co-parenting is effective. Call The Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583 with your questions about divorce, custody and using Our Family Wizard.
Preparing Yourself to File for Divorce
Protect Yourself, Assets and Parental Rights while Preparing Yourself to File for Divorce
People call a divorce lawyer when they believe they are ready to file for divorce. There are several steps people can take to get educated about the process and what to expect. Protecting yourself, your assets and parental rights is important. The better prepared you are, the easier the process of divorce and child custody may be easier.
Learning about the divorce mediation and process of negotiating a Mediated Settlement Agreement is important. The more you can peacefully settle out of court, the more resources you save to address higher conflict issues.
Note that If you are in any danger of physical harm, do not delay in calling a divorce lawyer for a protective order. And if you are in the direction of harm by another, call the police to report family violence and domestic abuse. Too many people who waited too long became statistics.
Steps to Take for Protecting Yourself when Filing for Divorce
Likely you have talked to people close to you when you started considering whether divorce was an option. Preparing for divorce and things go as peacefully as possible, we must also be ready to respond to a breakdown in communication and good intentions. Get your emotional support team ready.
Thinking about emotional support, prepare not to fill social media with details about your divorce and every twist and turn. These things can and do come back around and can harm you.
Picking Your Emotional Support Team
Feeling isolated and having an existential crisis does not help us make better decisions. Divorce is an emotional experience and our feelings can affect our judgment. Finding a mental health professional, you like, and trust is a good idea.
Support groups for divorcing people help many people realize that in a closed and private setting, you are not the only one going through problems. You can also offer support to the others in your group which becomes part of your emotional support team.
Managing Social Media During Divorce
While it may be tempting to vent on social media on the way out of a hearing or mediation, don’t do it. Some people suggest avoiding social media entirely during divorce. It is ultimately up to you to know whether you can keep quiet about the divorce and maintain a happy presence online talking about anything else.
Too often what is said on Facebook and other social media sites ends up being discussed in divorce cases. The last thing anyone needs is to have evidence of badmouthing a spouse or family. Think as well that while your children may be young now, someday they may also be on social media and see what you said in an avoidable angry rant.
Protecting Your Assets When Preparing Yourself to File for Divorce
Do you want to be the parent that stays in the house and has custody of the kids? Are you the parent planning to move out and get a new place where the kids can come for visitation? In either case, planning for maintaining your life before you file for divorce can help put things in perspective.
How Much Money Do You Need?
Maintaining separate homes and lives costs money. Every family is different. People also adjust differently to a change in financial circumstances. Some people are spenders while others are savers. How much money will you need to maintain your lifestyle after divorce? Are you willing to downsize or are you going to work more than before to increase your income to pay for you and your family’s ongoing living expenses while saving for the future?
When divorcing with assets in retirement accounts, investments, and property, you can work with a divorce financial professional who can suggest options to maintain asset values and appreciation. People are often surprised how quickly cash accounts can be depleted when there is not enough income coming in so that assets can be preserved for the future.
Does Divorce Affect Where Are You Going to Live and Work?
Part of preparing yourself to file for divorce includes a good look at your new home and work situation. If your best job opportunity requires you to move further away from your soon to be ex-spouse, will the increased income disrupt custody and visitation? Some people continue working in their current career job after divorce and seek further education and training to climb the ladder to better opportunities. Especially when divorcing with children it is important to realize how the logistics of pick up and drop off for visitation may work.
Parenting Rights to Protect when Preparing Yourself to File for Divorce
The reality of your job and work demands can affect the feasibility of seeking to be the primary parent. If you have younger children and commute to work, it can be challenging to be the primary parent with whom the children reside. Seeking the court’s appointment as the parent with the exclusive right to establish the residence of a child is something you and your divorce lawyer should discuss in creating a strategy that makes sense for your reality.
Parenting rights are important. When you are well-prepared for the process of divorce, you may find the best solution for custody and visitation through mediation. Alternatively, if you are litigating a custody contest for rights and duties as a parent, prepare for battle. Your divorce lawyer can fight for you in child custody proceedings, but beware that all kinds of past acts and incidents can come back to threaten your case. Being honest and truthful with your lawyer about the worst things your spouse and their supporters may say about you.
Part of Being Prepared Before You File for Divorce is Hiring a Great Divorce and Custody Lawyer
Southlake divorce and child custody attorney, Leslie Barrows stresses the importance of hiring a lawyer you trust and with whom you feel comfortable. To learn more about Leslie Barrows you can listen to this podcast, Attorney Profile: Leslie Barrow’s Law Practice.
Contact us online or call us at The Barrows Firm in Southlake by dialing (817) 481-1583 to schedule a consultation with Attorney Leslie Barrows when you are preparing yourself to file for divorce.
Pitfalls of Social Media in Divorce and Family Law
Updated January 30, 2019
A significant amount of divorce and family law cases involve the use of social media evidence to prove allegations and win in court. There is an irony in the design of social media platforms. It helps us meet and attract people and keep in touch with friends. The counterbalance involves people becoming angry, jealous, upset which can lead to losing relationships and being isolated from others. The ability to cyber stalk one another opens the door to misunderstandings, assumptions and real evidence of good or bad conduct. When social media evidence is introduced in divorce and family law cases, the credibility of the people involved can be inferred from social media activity.
Social media activity may lead to divorce. “A recent study has found a correlation between relationship health and Facebook use that may cause more people to want to switch off the computer and smartphone in favor of spending more time paying attention to their spouses.1” Being addicted to social media and our devices can lead to consequences. Jealous spouses or family members might start investigating one another and could create unnecessary problems or make a discovery that changes the nature of a relationship.
Do you know or remember what content is out there, and what stories could be told about you?
Being proactive is important. It is always a good practice to review your social media sites every now and then, to scrub for any posts or content that might be taken the wrong way or lead to unfortunate innuendo. Memes and quotes from others can be inferred to mean just about anything when another person is looking for a fight. Remember, however, when scrubbing or eliminating content on your social media, there may be a permanent record of it somewhere. We have no idea who may screenshot and save our pictures and posts, especially if one person anticipates a divorce or family law action in the near future.
Social media is used in evidence introduced to prove allegations in divorce cases.
A petition for divorce could be based on no-fault allegations but it could also be based on the fault allegations of adultery, cruelty or abandonment, for example. There is a financial incentive to allege fault because the wronged party may be entitled to more money in the division of the marital property and assets. Social media posts are used with increased frequency to prove the allegations in the petition. In allegations of adultery and dissipation of marital assets on a paramour, the pictures on Facebook or check-ins at an out of the way happy hour stop can and are often accepted as evidence of an affair. A judge or jury reviewing social media evidence is going to have impressions of the credibility of the parties involved in divorce. Being ready to defend your social media use is imperative to success in a contested divorce case. Being transparent and honest is always recommended. Lying to a judge or your lawyer is a bad idea because the truth most often comes out and your credibility is at stake.
The best interests of children in contested custody can involve social media evidence.
In contested child custody cases, social media can be useful for the judge or jury considering the best interests of children and how children in particular cases appear, in joy or sorrow. The customs and standards of living and lifestyle in a family can also be proven through a history of consistent social media content. While social media can be helpful, it can also be threatening in custody cases. When one parent alleges the other engages in wrong behavior, social media posts may be collected and used to tell a persuasive story about the other parent or their family or friends who may also have an influence on children. Imagine a custody hearing or trial where several witnesses testify about what was really happening in the pictures at little Billy’s birthday party; things can get rather heated.
Adopting best social media practice is always good for credibility, even if you are not in litigation.
Many social media experts and personal coaches agree that the people engaged in social media presume a level of truth in what people see and post online. Because so many people have smartphones and technology to capture everything around them, it is a best practice to assume that every time you leave the house, everyone around you could be recording audio, video or capturing pictures that may need to be explained later. When it comes to divorce and family law matters, the use of social media in litigation is here to stay and will likely continue to increase. As the rules and laws adapt to address social media and the use of our technology and devices, divorce and family law attorneys will need to counsel clients on their use and history on social media. Every day is a good day to practice good social media etiquette, and not have to worry as you may meet someone special and start a family or terminate your relationships with others.
The Barrows Firm attorneys frequently counsel and defend clients whose social media is introduced in their family law or divorce case. If you would like more information about The Barrows Firm, P.C., please contact the firm by calling (817) 481-1583. The Barrows Firm is located downtown Fort Worth at 500 East Belknap Street, near the Tarrant County Courthouse and the Tarrant County Family Law Center.
- HG.org Legal Resources, Facebook has Become a Leading Cause in Divorce Cases.
Divorcing with Children 103: 50/50 Equal Access Possession Schedules
50/50 Equal Access Possession Schedules as Alternatives to the Standard Possession Orders
Divorcing with children in Texas requires decisions about which parent will have which rights and duties and where the children will live during and after the divorce. Even though Texas law presumes both parents should be named as joint managing conservators with shared rights and duties regarding a child and their residence, school, church, doctor and more, one parent is often named the primary parent and that is the parent who usually also has the exclusive right to determine the residence of the child. The other parent traditionally has periods of possession of and access to the child, what is otherwise called visitation.
When many of the financial issues can be settled through mediation or other alternative dispute resolution out of court, the children’s issues regarding which parent is named as primary and which may have rights to determine the exclusive residence of the child are frequently contested and a source of serious conflict.
Leslie Barrows, principal of The Barrows Firm in Southlake says, “50/50 works if parents live in close proximity and have the ability to co-parent with one another. Once other spouses and stepchildren are introduced into the picture it can be more difficult because routines change.”
In addition to this article, you may also want like Divorcing with Children 101: Divorcing with Children Without Anxiety, and Divorcing with Children 102: Child Custody. Call us at The Barrows Firm for more information (817) 481-1583.
Making the Case for Equal Access Possession
Whether equally shared possession is a group or alternating days or weeks, 50/50 custody agreements can work well for certain families. Some say that equal access possession is easier for children to remember where they are going to be. Kids who can spend equal time with both their parents may be less likely to fear that they are missing out on the attention and relationship time with one parent. Also, as attorney Barrows also says, “Equal access possession does away with the word “primary” which leads many cases straight to trial because one parent wants the primary parent designation.”
When both parents have 50/50 custody, a child may also appreciate that both parents are equal, and both are good. When one parent “wins” custody and is named primary parent, a child may have an impression that the primary parent is better than the other or is somehow more equipped to be a good parent.
Equal access possession schedules are not for everyone, however. Also, things can change, and new circumstances can prompt a possession schedule change, which does not have to be a bad thing. At the end of the day, it is in a child’s best interest to have meaningful time and emotional bonds with both parents. It fosters safety, security and a hopefully an appreciation for compromise and sharing.
Here are some examples of 50/50 custody arrangements on the popular website, Custody Exchange.
When Parents Live Nearby, 50/50 Equal Access is Easier
Logistics are a key ingredient to a successful 50/50 custody arrangement. If you and your former spouse or other parent live in close to one another, the child’s home and school routines are less likely to be disturbed by an equal access schedule.
For example, if it is Mom’s week and the child left something for school at Dad’s house, it is easy enough for co-parents to drop off the missing book folder that did not make it into the backpack. If Mom and Dad live in different counties or many miles apart, it makes the logistics of getting to school and other activities impractical.
When Parents Are Co-Parenting Well, an Equal Access Possession Schedule Can Work
Being flexible, being fair, and putting the child’s best interests first are important to co-parenting. Kids have enough to worry about just being kids, without worrying about parents fighting for their time and attention. If Mom is crushed every time the child goes to Dad’s or vice versa, the child may feel fault and guilt about traveling back and forth. The animosity that builds in some people can prevent effective co-parenting which requires parents to get along peaceably and agree their child needs both parents in their lives, with a positive attitude.
Divorcing with children and co-parenting well is something that takes the right attitude and it requires flexibility. When situations that arise that conflict with the possession schedule, a good co-parent can compromise and communicate well. Effective communication with the other parent is imperative when considering a 50/50 equal access possession schedule. When groups of alternating days or weeks need to be adjusted because one parent has a work trip or vacation, or some other situation arises, co-parents must be able to communicate well, not let emotion take over, and really be team players.
Introducing New Partners and Stepchildren With 50/50 Possession Orders
All the negotiating and planning involved in arriving at an agreed possession schedule can go out the window when families grow, adding new spouses and stepchildren. While the 50/50 equal access possession schedule may work well with everyone involved in creating it, it can be a logistical nightmare when there one of the co-parents has a new spouse and children with whom your family is blending.
It is not that the new spouse or stepchildren intend to upset the status quo, rather the number of schedules and potential conflicts may require some extra flexibility. If you are trying to keep track of who has possession more days than the other parent and things are no longer as equal, it may be time to consider other options. Ideally, everyone can get along and appreciate one another’s time and needs while remaining focused on the best interests of your child.
Net Benefit: Avoiding One Parent Being Named the Primary Parent
As previously mentioned in this article, parents often take custody cases to full trials to be named the primary parent. This designation in the grand scheme of conservatorship and possession and access serves its function, but it certainly does not mean that one parent is better than the other because they are named “primary.” It also doesn’t mean that one parent won custody and the other lost.
When there is nothing to gain by fighting over being the primary parent, more parents might agree to negotiate towards settlement out of court and save time and resources for themselves and the future of the children.
Negotiating 50/50 Equal Access Possession with Southlake Divorce Attorney Leslie Barrows
Divorcing with children can be challenging and doing what is in the best interests of children can be a point of disagreement among parents. The more parents can negotiate towards conflict resolution out of court, the better they can save time and resources for other matters. Being open to 50/50 equal access possession schedules can be a stretch for some people who are just not used to the concept. In practice, they might find out it works well, and the children are happy and well adjusted. Remember, if it needs to be modified later, that is always an option.
Contact us online or call us at The Barrows Firm in Southlake by dialing (817) 481-1583 to schedule a consultation with Attorney Leslie Barrows when divorcing with children and you are interested in an equal access possession schedule.
Divorcing with Children 102: Child Custody
Divorcing with Children: Child Custody Issues
When divorcing with children, child custody must be determined by agreement or ordered by the court. The terms custody and visitation are commonly used by people when talking about conservatorship and possession or access to the child, the terms used in the Texas Family Code. Everything decided should be in the best interests of the child. When custody orders need modifications or enforcement, separate proceedings are available.
Conservatorship decisions involve parents’ rights and responsibilities to make decisions for the child. Possession of and access to the child is the visitation element of a child custody order. The parties or the court must set a possession and access schedule. In the beginning of a divorce with children, at a temporary orders hearing, it is initially determined where and with whom the child will live during the divorce. At the end of the divorce, at the final trial often incorporates on a permanent basis, the temporary orders regarding conservatorship (custody) and possession of and access to the child (visitation).
In the Southlake area and around Tarrant and Denton Counties, Attorney Leslie Barrows is well known and respected for her work in divorce and child custody negotiation and litigation. She and her team at The Barrows Firm can develop the right strategy for you and your family.
In case you missed it, please see our first blog article in this series, Divorcing with Children 101, focusing on reducing the child’s anxiety and maintaining a mentally and emotionally safe and secure environment.
Joint Managing Conservatorship
When parents share the responsibility for making decisions in the best interest of the child they are appointed and named joint managing conservators. In a parenting plan, the joint managing conservators are identified and assigned specific decisions to be made together or independently and by whom.
One of the specific rights assigned to one parent is the exclusive right to determine the residence of the child, and this is a significant determination, often negotiated and litigated in high conflict divorces with children.
When both parents are joint managing conservators, one parent is deemed the primary parent, with whom the child lives primarily, as the other parent has periods of possession or access.
Joint managing conservatorship requires the cooperation of both parents as they share decision making responsibilities. Hopefully, they can actively participate in the child’s activities and their emotional and educational development. When communication breakdowns, changes in circumstances and conflict prevent effective co-parenting, the joint managing conservatorship may no longer be effective. The rights and duties of the parents can be modified in a separate legal action so that one parent will be a sole managing conservator and the other a possessory conservator.
Sole Managing Conservatorship
A sole managing conservator is one parent who must make decisions in the child’s best interest and exclusively determine the primary residence of the child. In divorces with children where one parent, by credible evidence, engaged in past or present child neglect or abuse or family violence, the other parent will be the sole managing conservator because a joint managing conservatorship is prohibited by the law stated in the Texas Family Code.
A separate modification suit is required to change the rights and responsibilities of conservators from joint managing to sole managing conservators. The modification requires proving material and substantial changes in circumstances or proving evidence of family violence or a conviction for child abuse, an automatic ground for modification.
Possession of and Access to the Child
In most divorces with children, child custody agreements incorporated into parenting plans are based on a standard model for shared parenting time which is called a possession schedule. Each county may adopt a standard possession schedule with a few expanded versions and options to fit different families.
Parents may use a standard possession and access order as a starting point and can negotiate a custom schedule that works for everyone involved. Especially where one parent has a challenging work schedule including travel obligations and other responsibilities that make it difficult to adhere to a fixed or standard schedule.
Being flexible with the needs of the other parent and making concessions in the schedule from time to time is appropriate. Planning ahead for holidays and adjusting for family events and vacations helps reduce conflict. Communication among parents and families is a key component of successful co-parenting with schedules for possession of and access to the child.
Mediation and Alternative Dispute Resolution for Determining Child Custody, for Modifications and Enforcement Actions
Parents must decide how they want to settle child custody conflicts. The parties can use mediation to resolve high conflict issues. One advantage of mediation is saving time and resources. Instead of setting, preparing and attending a contested court hearing, the parties can stay out of court. Mediation and other alternative dispute resolution methods usually take place at an agreed time and place where everyone can work at compromising and getting down to the bottom line. When divorcing with children, child custody conflict resolved by the parties out of Court is encouraged by judges.
Mediation used to reach an agreement and parenting plan in the original divorce and custody suit is similar to mediation used after the suit is over and co-parents have modification and enforcement issues. After the divorce time will test parenting plans and possession schedules. When things are not working and one of the parties falls out of compliance, mediation can be very effective in a suit to modify or enforce the Court’s order.
Divorcing with Children and Child Custody Lawyer, Leslie Barrows in Southlake, Texas
Attorney Leslie Barrows is the founding and principal divorce and custody lawyer at The Barrows Firm in Southlake, where she and her team of trial attorneys and paralegals are focused solely on divorce and family law cases, representing parents divorcing with children and child custody issues. Attorney Barrows is a divorce lawyer and mediator. She is a mother of boys herself and is an active member in several organizations in the Southlake and Tarrant County areas.
Contact us online or call us at The Barrows Firm in Southlake by dialing (817) 481-1583 to schedule a consultation with Attorney Leslie Barrows when divorcing with children and child custody is a primary concern.
Divorcing with Children 101
Divorcing with Children Without Anxiety
Raising happy children after divorce should be the goal of both parents. The decision to divorce can be challenging when parents consider the potential impact on the children. It is a good idea to prepare ahead of time and figure out what to tell them, either together as parents or one on one. Many divorced parents say their kids are happier after the divorce, no longer witnessing unhappy parents in a bad marriage. Telling the kids and working with their range of reactions can be a challenge. Mental health professionals can be great resources, a neutral third party with whom children can be blunt.
During your divorce, there are two important things to remember. First, don’t talk to your kids about the divorce or tell them negative things about their other parent of whom they are half. Second, do spend time reassuring your children and making them feel safe and secure.
Making sure your children know that the divorce has nothing to do with them is important. As you give them reassurance that the divorce will not change anything with exception of possession schedules for visitation, do some research and do appreciate the advice of your attorney, mental health professional, and others who have an impact on kids. Extended family members, teachers, and peers from sports, school and church can all play an important role in divorce and raising kids in 2019.
You may also appreciate this article in Parenting Magazine with additional tips for divorcing with children, Raising Healthy, Happy Kids Through a Divorce.
Is the Divorce Better for the Kids
No kid ever said I wish my parents would get back together and fight all the time. It can be terribly challenging for kids who watch parents in unhappy and sometimes violent marriages. Children need to feel safe. Children need to feel secure. Children need to feel loved.
When ending a bad marriage, you have more one on one time with your children to nurture their needs of safety, security, and love. Letting them know they are not broken just because your marriage ended is also important. If you and your former spouse can co-parent effectively and focus on reassuring the children, everyone can move forward in life in peace.
Telling Children About the Divorce
How to tell kids about the divorce is a challenging question parents face. Young children in pre-school years don’t really know what divorce means. Telling them that Mommy and Daddy are no longer going to live in the same house but will still see them regularly, begs the question, who is going to take care of me then? The fundamentals of life can be scary to a young child and it is so important to spend quality time with them and give them the reassurance they need.
Pre-teens know a little more but can be confused about why the divorce is happening. Telling your children, you plan to divorce is scary for older children who are just getting their footing in the world. Even though they are better prepared for divorce, the sense of security and permanency of the family unit is gone. Their minds may wander and wonder if anything in the world is secure or permanent. Telling children about the divorce can be an opportunity to create new bonds and schedule important one on one time with the child.
Children Reacting to Divorce
How will children react to the divorce? Consider a four-year-old and a 14-year-old adapting to their parents’ divorce. The four-year-old may be young enough to accept information about a world they are still figuring out, compared to the 14-year-old who thinks they know everything. But what the older one doesn’t really know is why their parents are fighting or what leads to divorce.
Kids may try to please parents by not being a wrench in the family. The older ones likely know other kids from divorced parents and see it is okay and there is nothing to worry about. That said, the second a new partner shows up, all bets can be off, and children may act out to get attention. This may be the time the school calls and the once well-mannered student is now bullying other kids.
Surprising Anxiety Considerations when Divorcing with Children
- Co-parenting is not something we are born to know how to do. Some of the things we try to make everything well with a kid can backfire. Take, for example, letting your child decide where they want to stay and letting them create their own visitation schedule. Mental health professionals often say children complain about being asked to pick between parents because they are don’t want to hurt either parent’s feelings.
- Having no predictable custody and visitation agreement can be a problem. While it seems like a nice idea to be very flexible and go with the flow, children craving certainty can be upset when they never know where they are going to be. Uncertainty adds to anxiety.
- Letting your child be the messenger between you and your spouse can also cause stress and anxiety. While you may not want to talk to your former spouse directly, telling your kid to ask their mother or father about pick-ups, drop-offs and scheduling can be a problem. When the child messenger relays information you don’t like, it is too easy to react and put your child in the middle. Instead, try using text messages or neutral information exchange websites like Our Family Wizard.
With Further Questions About Divorcing with Children, Call on The Barrows Firm in Southlake
Southlake family law and divorce attorney Leslie Barrows is the founding and managing attorney at The Barrows Firm in Southlake. A mother of boys and an active member of the community, Leslie is an experienced divorce and family law attorney with the best resources for all your needs when going through divorce and matters affecting children including issues of conservatorship, possession or access to the children, the right to exclusively determine the residence of the child, child support, medical expenses and more.
Divorcing with Children does not have to be difficult when you have the support of friends, family and the right legal and mental health professionals who support you during and after your divorce with children. To learn more about The Barrows Firm, our team, or filing for divorce, please contact us online or call the Southlake office at (817) 481-1583.
Uninsured Medical Expense Reimbursement, Furnishing Explanations of Benefits
Uninsured Medical Expense Reimbursement: Must Send EOBs
The parent seeking reimbursement for uninsured portions of children’s health-care expenses must fulfill the conditions causing the other’s duty to pay. The parent should present the other with any Received forms, receipts, bills, statements and explanations of benefits (EOBs) relating to medical expenses. How EOBs and statements should be presented for reimbursement should be stated in the district court’s order and judgment regarding reimbursement for the other’s payment of medical expenses.
When we take our child to the doctor, fill their prescriptions and follow up with medical care instructions the insurance policy covering the child may not pay the entire bill for service. The policy might also require the parent to submit their bills to the insurance company for reimbursement. When the insurance company makes a payment on the child’s behalf within the insurance policy, EOB statements are sent to the person who made the insurance claim. That EOB statement is important when another parent has a duty to reimburse for a portion of the cash amount that had to be paid which was not covered by insurance.
Most agreed orders or decisions by the Court and included in temporary or final orders include obligations to reimburse another for uninsured medical expenses paid for a child. The order should specify the procedure for submitting statements of paid medical expenses to be reimbursed.
Questions about EOBs and understanding the forms? Here’s an EOB resource on healthinsurance.org.
Motions for Enforcement for Expense Reimbursement
When a party, usually a parent, has the duty to reimburse the other and the procedure is not followed, and reimbursements are not made as required, the recourse is a motion for enforcement of the court’s order. Motions for enforcement often include requests that attorney’s fees be paid, generally stating that the party willfully and knowingly failed to comply with the order of the Court. Refusing to or not giving EOBs in a proper and timely manner can lead to an enforcement action where the party bringing the action also asks for payment their attorney’s fees.
Second District Opinion: Uninsured Medical Expense Reimbursement
A suit regarding uninsured medical expense reimbursement was recently decided by the Second District Court of Appeals in Fort Worth. In the recent case, the court held that EOBs and related statements showing reimbursable medical expenses must be timely tendered to the party from whom reimbursement is due, based on the order of the Court.
In the Interest of L.K. and O.K., Children, the option states in pertinent part as follows: "Mother contents, in part, that her obligation to reimburse grandparents within any specific time never arose because she never received the explanations of benefits." The court agreed and reversed the trial court's order granting attorney’s fees for bringing an action to enforce the terms of an agreed order among mother and grandparents, requiring the mother to reimburse the grandparents for 25% of the uninsured portion of the children's health-care expenses within thirty days." No. 02-18-00049-CV.
Prerequisites for Liability for Payment
To collect the ordered amount of reimbursement for uninsured medical expenses for a child, the party seeking reimbursement must satisfy the prerequisites for liability for payment. The other party is not liable for payment until that prerequisite is met. A prerequisite for payment could be, “furnish the other party all forms, receipts, bills, statements, and EOBs for uninsured portions of healthcare expenses within thirty days of receipt.”
Disagreements about what it means to “furnish the other party” can arise. For example, if one sends the EOBs by mail to a post office box instead of sending them by email with attachments of the original forms and statements, the prerequisite for liability of payment might not be there.
The Barrow’s Firm website is a resource for common topics in family law and divorces in Texas.
Settling Conflicts Regarding Expense Reimbursement Out of Court
Sometimes people cannot get along. Other times some people refuse to get along. When one parent obligated to reimburse the other fails to make payment because the process for seeking reimbursement was not technically followed, the conflict can turn into an enforcement action that costs time and money. Often at the first sign of a problem with complying with the Court’s order is addressed in correspondence between the party’s attorneys.
In other cases, if the divorce lawyers are no longer retained, disagreements over medical expense reimbursement are either handled without lawyers, until the conflict escalates, and one sues the other for not complying with the order. They ask the court to order the noncomplying party to pay for the attorney they had to hire to get the expenses reimbursed.
Some children have greater medical needs and there are frequently uninsured portions of medical expenses that are paid and need to be reimbursed according to the order of the Court. To create that duty to pay the party requesting reimbursement must create that duty to pay by with the necessary prerequisites such as sending EOBs to the other in the time, place and manner set forth in the order.
Turn to The Barrows Firm to Settle Reimbursement Issues and Enforce Reimbursement Orders
Leslie Barrows and her team at The Barrows Firm in Southlake can help you recover unreimbursed medical expenses if your co-parent refuses to pay. If an enforcement action becomes necessary, the experienced trial attorneys at The Barrows Firm will represent you and enforce the order in court.
The Barrows Firm in Southlake is available by phone at (817) 481-1583 or make contact through the website.
Holiday Divorce and Custody Issues
January is a busy month for new divorce, custody and modification filings because there are so many holiday divorce and custody issues for parents and kids. Most people who file a case in January decided months earlier and chose to wait until after the holidays. Some people wait until after Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Years because they hope some holiday magic will fix their problems. Others wait until the new year, so the children’s holidays are not interrupted.
Parents recently divorced with a new custody arrangement hope that everything will go according to schedule, and plans agreed upon by co-parents. Often their children who know plenty of other kids with divorced parents are happier than expected. However, that happiness may be a performance to make everyone happy when there is underlying hurt.
Mental health counselors and therapists are valuable when it comes to holiday divorce and custody issues, not only for children but parents as well. Listening to a mental health professional’s tips for making it through the holidays can be an asset. They may remind you and the kids to be patient, flexible and focus on other people. They might remind you what the holidays are all about and not let the divorce or custody case define who you are and what matters most.
Considering divorce? Read our article, Telling your spouse you want a divorce.
Holiday Divorce Issues
People who know they want a divorce but wait for the holidays are full of anticipation. Many have already talked to a divorce lawyer, maybe some time ago, and are mentally preparing for January. It can be easy to wear a smile and bear one’s emotions knowing it is the last time to fake it. This can be a change for people who previously dreaded family holiday dinners and get-togethers because their spouse was becoming unbearable.
Those people still on the fence about divorce can use Thanksgiving and Christmas to picture themselves no longer married and happily celebrating with the friends and family who make life better, not worse. Picturing new traditions and happier children no longer putting up with fighting parents can be a light at the end of the tunnel.
Custody Exchanges and Co-Parenting Concerns
Most first holiday seasons after divorce parents stick closely to the Standard Possession Order or alternative order entered in their case. Dropping off and picking up children can either go well or can be the flashpoint for greater problems. Rarely are both parents happy about the divorce and custody arrangement. Visitation exchanges can be an unfortunate opportunity for the spiteful to make their points and emotions known.
Depending on the terms of your parenting plan and custody order you could bring another along for pick up or drop off as a witness to visitation exchange or appoint another person you trust to help and hopefully avoid an unpleasant confrontation.
Children Adapting to Holiday Divorce and Custody Issues
In many cases, children respond better to divorce and custody cases than do their parents. As many children have friends with divorced parents, the holiday visitation exchanges and holiday scheduling confusion is normal. What children might not be expecting, however, can also be a surprise to you.
Most divorce lawyers and mental health professionals working with families and children advise waiting a significant amount of time before introducing kids to a new partner and/or their own children. Whether the kids get along with the children of the new partner is a short-term concern. The long-term issue can be stability and knowing who is going to be around and upon whom can children rely?
Even after you or your former spouse may be dating someone for many months, the holidays might not be the best time to mixing children and creating blended families.
Make Records of Noteworthy Events
When a pattern of failure to comply with the court’s order is clear, a modification case could be on the horizon. If there are witnesses to certain conduct, make notes of who was present. Often in custody modifications and enforcement cases, the evidence is testimony from witnesses with personal knowledge of situations.
When the other parent of your children is still angry about the divorce or custody case and outcome, they may want to let you know they are upset and lose their manners around the holidays. Sometimes people take longer to get over their feelings and will start being better about co-parenting. But if visitation exchanges, bad talk in front of kids and other wrong behavior continues, you may need to produce a record of poor behavior to prove your case.
Saying Positive Messages and Keeping a Smile Despite a Divorce or Custody Case.
As the saying goes, fake it until you make it. Nobody expects anyone in the middle of a divorce or contested custody case to be the poster child for holiday happiness. For all people of all ages, there are thoughts and memories about holidays that come around and not every memory is the happiest.
Reminiscing with others over bad times can be good therapy. Remembering the good and the bad can be simultaneous and others may recall those holidays when you wondered whether everyone was going to make it to the New Year in one piece.
If your current situation has room for improvement, think and talk about the good times to come. Keeping a positive outlook is a healthy way to move forward. Try counting down the days until January is here and kids are back in school. Talk about planning for spring vacations and summer camp. Anything you can do to focus the attention away from your legal issues can ease the pain.
Leslie Barrows is Southlake Divorce Lawyer You Can Trust
Whether you are planning to divorce in January or you have been divorced and holiday custody and visitation arrangements are not working, you can call Leslie Barrows to learn your legal rights and options when those holiday divorce and custody issues arise, and you need an experienced divorce and custody lawyer. The Barrows Firm in Southlake is a divorce and family law office and you can contact or call them anytime at (817) 481-1583.
Thanksgiving After Divorce
Being Grateful on Thanksgiving After Divorce
Given the options of having an interrupted life and sharing your kids versus never having them, any parent who loves their children will be grateful for them on Thanksgiving. After the divorce and custody process is finalized, we all must move on with our lives and that means dealing with the holidays.
The good news is nobody can tell you what to do or how to feel or act. Custody and visitation are something to get used to and your Thanksgiving is not going to be normal right away. Regardless of your feelings about not having your ex at the table, their presence, good or bad is still something that will be a part of you and your memories that all seem to rush back around times like Thanksgiving.
So, plan your meal, or not. Make plans to watch the parades, or not. Thanksgiving After Divorce is going to happen whether you like it or not. It also begins the Christmas season and you have much to prepare for and many people to see, including your children and extended family.
Custody and Visitation After Divorce
In Texas, custody and visitation plans follow the local county’s Standard Possession Order (SPO), a schedule laying out periods of access for the non-primary parent for visitation with the kids. Holidays like Thanksgiving alternate and the co-parent usually has the kids on odd-numbered years, from the last day of school before Thanksgiving until Sunday evening.
Use this link to the Tarrant County Standard Possession and Access (Visitation) Order
Even if your divorce decree includes the SPO or another custom schedule, as parents, you both can be flexible and trade time as you all may agree. For example, if relatives on one side are only in town on limited days, letting the kids come by, or sharing time on Thanksgiving is a nice gesture that can go a long way as you learn a new co-parenting relationship with your former spouse.
You Don’t Have to Change Your Routine on Thanksgiving After Divorce
While it is popular to talk about creating new traditions after divorce, there is no reason you must change anything about how you want to celebrate Thanksgiving.
Keeping tradition is something people hold dear. With birth and death, we all know the number of place settings may change over the years and the feeling is similar on Thanksgiving Day when your former spouse and kids are not there. You can still set your table and cook all the dishes you love. And if you choose not to invite any other people to come celebrate with you, then you will have more leftovers, unless your kids come back sooner and eat all those leftovers of dishes they may have been missing at their other Thanksgiving.
Give Yourself the Opportunity to Take as Much Time to Adjust
The first year after a divorce is going to be a time of change. You are on your own schedule and nobody can tell you how to feel about holidays like Thanksgiving. If you prefer to go out to eat instead, go for it. We all need time to reflect and at times it seems like we have nothing for which to be thankful. Just because things change, doesn’t mean we have to stop being thankful. At times we are so self-focused we fail to see all the good things in our lives. Allow yourself the time to reflect and proceed at your own pace.
Should You Still Make Plans with Former In-laws to Thanksgiving?
Since Emily Post published her book “Etiquette” in 1922, generations have attended to accepted customs and rules of polite conduct. Today, the Emily Post Institute maintains a website with business, wedding and lifestyle categories of articles. There are topics including Holidays and Celebrations as well as Separation and Divorce.
While you may not base your post-divorce holiday decisions on the musings of others in society, there may be a few things to think about.
Decisions about in-laws may follow concerns of sensitivity, respect, and privacy. Even if you do not think you are expected to address them about whether you will see them or not, consider that all our personal relationships are important. If you are close friends with a now-former in-law, you might text them and find a time to get together during Thanksgiving weekend if you chose not to invite them over or attend their celebration if you are invited.
Is There Wiggle Room on Thanksgiving Day?
If you have a good enough relationship with your ex, you might negotiate your kids’ short appearance on Thanksgiving Day, even if it’s only an hour or two to watch the parade with grandparents and take some family pictures. If distance or circumstance prevents you from seeing your kids on Thanksgiving, try scheduling a time to Facetime them or chat on Skype so they can say hello to family and everyone who may be with you.
It is important to show your kids that everyone still moves forward with happy lives despite the divorce.
Being Grateful with Children on Thanksgiving Regardless of the Situation
When you may feel stressed about your first or second Thanksgiving after divorce, think about how much everyone’s lives can change over the years. Imagine you and your children being the most grateful for the future ahead of everyone. Families will continue growing and as you set the table years in the future you may have a new spouse, children, grandbabies and more. Always be thankful.
Southlake Divorce Attorney Leslie Barrows Wishes Everyone a Happy Thanksgiving
At The Barrows Firm in Southlake, Leslie and her team of trial attorneys, paralegals and support staff know how challenging it can when the holidays approach during or after a divorce or custody case. Know you are not alone in dealing with life and its changes.
For assistance with your family’s divorce and children’s issues, contact or call The Barrows Firm in Southlake at (817) 481-1583.
Leslie Barrows Top Attorney 2018
Being a Top Attorney is an Honor and Responsibility
Leslie Barrows recently received an email notifying her that she was selected to the list of named Top Attorneys in Fort Worth Magazine for Family Law. Nominations and votes by ballot by other Tarrant County attorneys are used in the process of naming annual Top Attorneys to be listed in the annual issue, including profiles of named Top Attorneys. This is the 17th year of the Top Attorneys publication and the December 2018 issue will be available shortly.
Like similar attorney ratings systems and awards, the Fort Worth Magazine Top Attorneys list is derived from local nominations and votes from other attorneys who know, like and trust Leslie Barrows. From watching her in court, by working together on a case, or watching her participate and speak all over Tarrant County for a variety of causes and organizations. Being named a Top Attorney means people are watching and taking notes.
The Responsibility of Meeting the Expectations of Others
Earning a positive reputation in a community of eager and zealous professionals takes a significant amount of work and energy. To start getting to know people and be invited to events and opportunities means you must start participating in the community, not only with work and legal related organizations but also the general community at large, where you also meet more professionals in other fields who are a great source of referrals and ideas.
Everyone who has earned recognition among their peers has stepped up to volunteer and help support worthy organizations and spends many hours with a variety of groups focused on causes and goals. Sometimes leadership roles are time consuming and make it difficult to manage a busy practice and busier extracurricular calendar. To that end, everyone who has made a name for themselves has earned it by putting in the long hours and doing their best to keep a positive attitude.
Living with Passion and Humility, Being a Good Member of Your Community
Anyone who thinks they have made it and no longer must work hard will hit the wall of reality, that relevance is not only earned, it must be maintained.
Leslie Barrows offered a few thoughts on the Top Attorney listing, “Being named a Top Attorney by peers helps me realize that while my peers recognize me for my work and dedication to my law practice and my community, I can not sit back and coast.”
As people say we are always learning and always growing, we all can all continue joining new groups, continue saying hello to the past groups and answering the phone when anyone in our past, present or future needs our help or just to talk.
People rely on Leslie Barrows and the attorneys and staff at The Barrows Firm when they need serious experience and attention to their high stakes divorce, custody, juvenile and probate legal matters. Leslie is available to schedule a consultation at (817) 481-1583. Thank you all for naming Leslie Barrows a Top Attorney in 2018.
Paralegals are First Responders
Whether serving in Juvenile Law or Private Divorce and Family Practice, Paralegals are True First Responders
Speaking to attendees of the annual State Bar of Texas Paralegal Conference about juvenile law, Leslie Barrows talked about the value of paralegals. “Paralegals are the first responders with the heart and soul of our team, advocating for our clients,” Barrows stated. There is a balance of compassion and responsibility when paralegals are juvenile law first responders.
In divorce and family law cases, paralegals are like nurses who know everything about a patient to assist the treating physician and others in the team. Our paralegals are the law firm’s first responders, giving immediate service and help to clients and the rest of our legal team.
A Team Approach to Service at The Barrows Firm
Being able to immediately respond to any client with an immediate need requires prompt action and a division of duties and responsibilities at The Barrows Firm in Southlake. Our communication and information processes are streamlined to be efficient and effective in helping our clients.
If Leslie or another associate attorney is unavailable in court, a properly instructed paralegal will talk to the client with their question or assist with an urgent matter. Even if the information is to sit tight and not talk to anyone else until Leslie contacts them, the client receives a quick and meaningful response.
Paralegals are First Responders Fielding Phone Calls
When paralegals are working on their instructed duties on client files and work production, such as assisting with discovery responses or requests, the client may rely on the paralegal working on their file to help answer questions and receive information quickly and efficiently, so the process keeps moving at an appropriate pace and issues are correctly addressed.
Attorneys rely on paralegals to research, receive and organize information so the attorneys have accurate information and can contact the clients with any follow up discussion as necessary.
Paralegals are Providing Care for Our Clients
Whether they are returning phone calls or emails, sending or receiving key information about deadlines and hearing or trial dates, paralegals are providing not only care but also reassurance to our clients about their cases and proceedings, so they are informed and comfortable with the process. Here at The Barrows Firm, we know that divorce, family law or custody case may be upsetting and uncomfortable, and we entrust our paralegals to always treat you with the dignity and respect you deserve at an important time in your life.
Leslie Barrows is the principal attorney at The Barrows Firm, serving clients in Tarrant County in Southlake, Colleyville, Grapevine, Trophy Club, Keller and surrounding areas including Denton County. The Barrows Firm accepts new cases and referrals for divorce, child custody, family law, juvenile, and probate law, and matters. Call today to schedule a meeting by dialing (817) 484-1583.
17 Ways to Prepare to Give Your Deposition
General Instructions on Deposition Preparation in Divorce and Family Law Cases
Being put on the spot is one thing, being deposed is another, but you do not need to worry if you know how to prepare to give your deposition in a divorce or family law case. Depositions are like what you see on television or movies when someone testifies in court. A deposition, however, does not take place at trial, It is part of the pre-trial discovery process. The opposing attorney will send a notice with the time and place you will be deposed to offer your testimony response to their questions. Documents may also be requested to bring along to the deposition. When you are prepared, tell the truth, stay calm, and are polite, there is no reason to lose sleep.
Remember that any questions, issues or challenges arising in your deposition can later be addressed at trial. While it is important to be accurate and truthful, there is an opportunity to correct problems.
General Deposition Preparation
- You do not need to bring anything with you to the deposition room unless I previously reviewed or approved it. However, the examiner taking the deposition may use their own notes or documents to refresh your recollection. If a document is presented to you, make sure to read it very carefully. Take your time to make sure you understand what it is and what it says.
- The examiner is not your friend. You have no duty to convince them of anything, but you do have a duty to answer their question. Be polite and answer shortly and succinctly. Do not keep talking and offer answers to questions not asked. Do not assume you know where they are going with their line of questioning and cut them off at the pass. The examiner might say they are confused, but that is not your concern. You only need to answer their question.
- Do not let the examiner put words in your mouth. Listen to their question carefully and do not assume that the examiner’s summary of facts is correct. If you have no personal knowledge of the summary they suggest then say you have no personal knowledge and stop talking.
- If you are concerned about particularly sensitive questions and answers, please talk with me, your attorney, before the deposition.
- Private conferences with your attorney should be limited to breaks except where you don’t know if a question violates a privilege such as the attorney-client privilege. If you cannot answer a question truthfully, accurately or succinctly, you may ask for a side conference with your attorney. Note that, generally, private attorney and client conferences are limited to breaks. If you need to change your answer to one of the questions, talk to me about it during a break and do not say anything otherwise. After the deposition is completed and we receive a transcript, there is an opportunity to correct small and technical changes.
- Do not promise to help the examiner with anything other than answering questions. There is no need to agree to look something up at the break, produce any documents, or get back to them later. Simply answer their questions truthfully and succinctly.
- Remember not to get angry, emotional, or become rattled. The examiner is not your soon to be former spouse, just his or her attorney. Do not address the opposing party. Do not tell the opposing counsel what you feel about the opposing party. And absolutely do not call anyone names or use abusive language. Please keep calm and smile when the deposition is being video-recorded.
Answering Deposition Questions
- Speak clearly so the court reporter can take an accurate transcript of the deposition. Make sure you tell the truth and remember that perjury is a 3rd Degree felony in Texas. Making untrue statements, on even minor details, can be used against you at trial to destroy your credibility.
- When the examiner asks you a question, listen carefully and then pause. The questions may not be as simple as they seem. Ask the examiner for clarification if you do not understand their question. When you pause, you are giving your attorney time to make an objection to the question. The transcript will not contain your pauses so do not worry about taking all the time you need.
- Only answer exactly what is asked. Do not offer any other information or story about your answer. If the examiner has follow-up questions they will ask them, and you may answer those accurately and succinctly.
- Do not use qualifying language or speculate in your answer. Do not add the terms “To the best of my recollection,” or “I believe it was/is…” If you are certain of a fact, simply answer the question. Not speculating means simply answering a question with a simple “Yes” or “No”. If you do not know the answer, simply say “I don’t know,” and stop. If the question is a date or time question, only answer if you specifically know. It is okay to say “I believe it was on or about…”
- Reminder: Only answer the question asked by the examiner and do not try to assume the next question. Keep your answers short. “Yes” and “No” are good short answers. That said, do not be misleading. If a short answer would be misleading, explain the answer briefly.
- Remember, the examiner may be trying to rattle you, make you look unintelligent, or foolish. Do not fall into their trap and say or do anything other than answer short truthful answers. Letting yourself be trapped by slick deposition tricks will not help you later at trial.
About Attorney Objections
- Your attorney may make an objection on the record to any of the questions asked by the examiner. Objections to the form of a question, for example, are handled on a later date and not at the deposition.
- If your attorney says, “OBJECT,” you should stop talking and not speak again until directed. Listen to the objections because they may give hints as to what or how to answer. This can be talked before your deposition and practice a little on how to handle objections.
- If your attorney says, “Don’t answer,” then DO NOT ANSWER.
- Often objections are place markers are usually limited. You may still need to answer the question but please remember #14 above. If your attorney says, “Don’t answer,” then DO NOT ANSWER.
Most attorneys in the Southlake area and Tarrant and Denton Counties are civil with one another and understand that they will see and work beside other opposing counsels again in other cases. Luckily most depositions are smooth and painless, but you must be prepared and appropriate regardless.
Southlake divorce and family attorney, Leslie Barrows, is experienced and skilled in pre-trial divorce litigation and the discovery process, including taking and defending depositions. Call Leslie at The Barrows Firm in Southlake by dialing (817) 481-1583, or contact us through the website with any of your questions about how to prepare to give your deposition in your divorce or family law case.
Married to a narcissist: Co-parenting challenges
Married to a narcissist: Co-parenting challenges
Being married to a narcissist can make life challenging, especially in co-parenting. Not everyone with narcissistic tendencies is to the level of psychological diagnosis, but they can be very challenging to live with. Why would any sane person stay married to someone who puts them down, lacks empathy and tries to constantly undermine your efforts? For some people there is a balance of interests in a marriage with children. Some stay married for the sake of children having a stable home until they are grown and off to work or college.
Even if you do think your spouse is somewhere on the narcissism spectrum, there may be several wonderful things you do love about them despite them being challenging, when you are trying to be a team in raising children.
What is co-parenting?
We often hear about co-parenting in terms of divorced parents of children who are trying to work together in the best interests of the children by reaching agreements and cooperating while raising children and making decisions the other parent may appreciate. Why don’t we hear more about co-parenting among married couples?
Married parents of children should work together like a team in raising children. One aspect of team parenting is agreeing on rules and enforcing them. Otherwise, when one parent says no, the other might say yes. Being married to a narcissist is challenging because the narcissist might undermine your efforts.
Narcissists’ inflated ego and lack of empathy
Psychology researchers suggest that narcissists appear to have strong personalities but are insecure about their true self. The narcissist focus on their self-image, thinking and behavior is said to give validation and stability when they otherwise lack self-esteem.
As a narcissist obsesses over being the boss, being perfect and having power and admiration, the other people in their life seemingly become objects that either confirm or deny the narcissist’s self-concept. They may only care about how any given situation affects them and how they are seen by others, completely missing the point that their actions can hurt others, especially their children, when they have no empathy for them.
How does being married to a narcissist affect co-parenting?
When you are married to someone obsessed with power, success and brilliance it can be difficult to be a team player while raising children together. Many narcissists are said to somewhat ignore others until there is an opportunity to be the hero and save the day, especially when others are watching.
A Psychology Today article offers tips for co-parenting with a narcissist:
- Expect and ignore backhanded comments and character attacks when the narcissist is just trying to get a rise out of you;
- Beware of the narcissist lining people up to rally against another, such as siding with the children and throwing you under the bus;
- Be strong and when threats or guilt trips appear, as the narcissist is trying to prove they can control you and steer you away from what you were doing with your children;
- Know when a narcissist is playing favorites, and know confronting them about it may do not good because the narcissist will not likely understand another’s perspective; and
- Be a parent with empathy, which children need for their emotional health, and which they will not likely get from the narcissist parent.
You may also read our blog article, Narcissistic personality disorder & divorce, where we talk about some of the challenges we face in divorce litigation when your soon to be ex-spouse is a narcissist.
Leslie Barrows is a divorce, custody, family law, juvenile law and estate planning attorney in Southlake, Texas. Please contact Leslie through the website or call the office anytime by dialing (817) 481-1583.
Dinner with the Mayor, supporting GRACE of Grapevine
Dinner plans with the mayor were made in March at the Women Empowered luncheon when Leslie Barrows and MaryLee Alford were the high auction bidders on the Dinner with Southlake Mayor, Laura Hill. With the support of Southlake area corporate sponsors, a portion of the proceeds was donated to the Grapevine Relief And Community Exchange (GRACE).
The Luncheon
The Women Empowered (WE) annual luncheon is hosted by the Southlake Chamber of Commerce to bring women together from all over North Texas to network, learn, support one another, become more involved and to give back to the community. The Spring 2018 WE luncheon theme was “Luncheon at Tiffany’s” and was held at the Hilton Southlake Town Square on the evening of March 2. Over 300 of the finest women in business in North Texas were in attendance. Guests enjoyed keynote speaker, Betsy Allen-Manning talk about helping managers and employees in developing leadership skills.
Among the fundraising opportunities at the 3rd annual WE luncheon was a private dinner with Southlake Mayor, Laura Hill.
The Dinner
Southlake Mayor Laura Hill and her husband Joe graciously hosted an elegant private dinner with Leslie Barrows, MaryLee Alford and their husbands Jeff Sanford and Carl Alford. Leslie and MaryLee were the high bidders on “Dinner with the Mayor,” raising money at the WE luncheon to support a client of GRACE.
Dinner by Brio Tuscan Grille’s executive chef, Jarad Bissell was well received. In a stunning 5-course meal with appetizers and fine wine, this group enjoyed one another’s company and celebrated the hard work and philanthropic efforts of so many who support the WE luncheons and their fundraising success.
Southlake Chamber
While the mission of the Southlake Area Chamber is to serve the needs of business, members of this active chamber understand that business only thrives when members of the community are at their best. There is a special feeling when business owners get together and raise money to donate to such important and compelling causes.
Gallery of Pictures at Dinner with the Mayor. Images by Luce Photography, LLC.
Leslie Barrows is a 360 West Top Attorney 2018
Leslie Barrows is a 360 West Top Attorney 2018
Leslie Barrows is again nominated and listed in the Top Attorneys by 360 West Magazine for 2018.
The 2018 Top Attorneys list be published in the July edition of 360 West Magazine. A reception celebrating the Top Attorneys will be held on the evening of Thursday, June 28, 2018 at Autobahn Porsche in Fort Worth.
Leslie Barrows was listed on the 360 West Magazine Top Attorneys list in 2017 in the Adoption Law category.
About the Top Attorneys list
360 West Magazine conducts a nominations process to collect ballots, vet and tally votes for selection to the Top Attorneys annual list. Attorneys in the area vote for other attorneys in 45 unique legal practice area specialties.
The Top Attorneys list is published for the benefit of fellow attorney colleagues recognizing one another for exemplifying excellence in their legal practice and general positive contribution to the community.
The Top Attorneys list is useful to community members looking for a recommended attorney
When 360 West Magazine readers find the list of Top Attorneys they can trust that the lawyers listed are selected by their peers and cannot pay to be considered or included. The honor of being listed a Top Attorney is earned and recognized by fellow attorneys with personal knowledge of those they nominate.
About Us: For more information please contact The Barrows Firm in Southlake.
If you would like more information about The Barrows Firm, P.C., please contact the firm by calling (817) 481-1583. The Barrows Firm is located at 700 East Southlake Boulevard in Southlake near the Town Square.
You can follow The Barrows Firm on social media and find important articles and resources about Texas law and how it may affect you or your family. The Barrows Firm is on Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn. To read client endorsements and reviews of Attorney, Leslie Barrows, please visit her Avvo.com profile.
A culture of client service in law firms
A culture of client service in law firms
The practice of law can be an honorable profession. In past decades there has been more pageantry in the professional services such as law practice, where the relationships among attorneys and their clients was honorable. Too often today, the pace of technology and business has encroached upon the attorney client culture which is too often noticed in client service.
Especially in divorce and family practice we attorneys sometimes hear clients express their dissatisfaction with their last attorney, often for lack of attention and failure of communication.
Trusted personal advisors and representatives
Creating the best client service culture in a law firm should be any attorney’s goal in small private practice. When you and your client build a trusted relationship, that client should come to you forever with all their questions, and not just in your practice area. While my practice is divorce, juvenile and probate, I know attorneys all over Tarrant and Denton counties, and I would rather help a former divorce client find a good tax, civil, business or criminal defense attorney who I know will do a great job and respect the client and the source of the referral.
Answering the urgent needs of a prospective or current client
One of the easiest ways to set your law firm apart from the rest is to treat every single client and prospective client like a VIP. A gift is returning from court to several messages from several clients waiting on you. Take no more than a minute or two per client to call them, acknowledge their call and tell them when you will realistically be able to communicate in greater depth or answer their question. By doing this you acknowledge to each client that they were important enough to get a return call. The net benefit is a better attorney-client relationship.
Note that some people chose to acknowledge a client quickly through sending short emails or text messages letting them know you got their message and when you can get back to them.
Being focused on results and not the process or means to the end
People want results and in divorce and family law particularly, people will pay for results. At the end of the day, no client ever said they were impressed by the number of well litigated hearings they experienced or how adept their attorney was at being creative and solving problems. Clients want results. When you talk about the process, talk about results and not the path.
Results should be the focus because that is why the client hired you in the first place. Nobody hires a lawyer they think will not get the job done.
About Us: For more information please contact The Barrows Firm in Southlake.
If you would like more information about The Barrows Firm, P.C., please contact the firm by calling (817) 481-1583. The Barrows Firm is located at 700 East Southlake Boulevard in Southlake near the Town Square.
You can follow The Barrows Firm on social media and find important articles and resources about Texas law and how it may affect you or your family. The Barrows Firm is on Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn. To read client endorsements and reviews of Attorney, Leslie Barrows, please visit her Avvo.com profile.
Meet the Mayor, Coach and Leslie event
Meet the Mayor, Coach and Leslie event
Guests arriving at The Barrows Firm in Southlake walked a red carpet from the valet stand to take a quick picture at the step and repeat banner as they welcomed friends and colleagues from the Southlake and Tarrant County legal community, the Southlake Chamber and residents and fans of Carroll Dragons football who were excited to meet the new coach. The event was catered by Ted Bilsky with Scratch Kitchen and the food was excellent.
Yesterday’s meet and greet was the ribbon cutting and one year anniversary of The Barrows Firm joining the Southlake Area Chamber of Commerce where principal Leslie Barrows is seated on the board of directors and serves as Policy Vice Chair.
Mayor Laura Hill toasts the Southlake community
Elected in 2015, Mayor Laura Hill remains committed to meeting everyone who makes Southlake, Texas a great place to live, work and raise a family. What truly makes the Southlake area unique is the openness of community leaders who take the time to meet people and learn who they are and the stories they share.
Meeting Carroll Dragons Football Coach Riley Dodge
Excited for Dragons football this fall? Many attendees at our meet and greet were ready to offer a firm handshake to new Carroll football coach, Riley Dodge. Not that we have high expectations, but winning Carroll Dragon football games on Thursday and Friday nights will soon be a frequent topic of watercooler talk.
About the Southlake Chamber
The Southlake Area Chamber of Commerce and its many active members echo an important message, you get out of the chamber community what you put into the chamber community. As more people move to Southlake and join the group, seeds are planted and relationships blossom. We all prefer to shop with and do business among those we know, like and trust. The meet and greet at The Barrows Firm this Thursday was a showcase example of this spirit of community.
About Us: For more information please contact The Barrows Firm in Southlake.
If you would like more information about The Barrows Firm, P.C., please contact the firm by calling (817) 481-1583. The Barrows Firm is located at 700 East Southlake Boulevard in Southlake near the Town Square.
You can follow The Barrows Firm on social media and find important articles and resources about Texas law and how it may affect you or your family. The Barrows Firm is on Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn. To read client endorsements and reviews of Attorney, Leslie Barrows, please visit her Avvo.com profile.
Grandparents visitation and access to grandchildren in Texas
Grandparents visitation and access to grandchildren in Texas
Grandparents know that if mom or dad says no, ask grandma or grandpa. The importance of grandparents in the lives of young children is unquestionable. They are wise and perfect in the eyes of our children. They are excellent baby sitters, chefs and will take you to see all the sights.
In some families affected by divorce and other complications in life, grandparents can take on more of a caretaker role. While grandparents often get involved on an informal and voluntary basis, there are other times that Texas courts are involved in grandparents and their ability to have court-ordered visitation, also known in Texas as possession and access.
The U.S. Supreme Court held in the year 2000 that parents have a fundamental right to raise their children. The Court: "The interest of parents in the care, custody and control of their children—is perhaps the oldest of the fundamental liberty interests recognized by this Court.[i]"
The parents’ fundamental right limits a court’s authority to order grandparent visitation, possession and access where the parents object and have sole rights to raise their children. While grandparents themselves do not have a fundamental right to raising grandchildren, state courts and laws giving special weight to a fit parent’s wishes.
There are often rumblings of new litigation and court cases involving these matters, but for now Troxel v. Granville stands as the law of the land. Meanwhile, in Texas there are conditions in which grandparents may obtain court-ordered possession and access.
When can Texas courts order grandparents to have visitation possession and access?
The office of the Texas Attorney General maintains a helpful “Grandparents’ Page” sharing the circumstances in which Texas law allows a court to authorize grandparent visitation.
Grandparent visitation must be in the best interest of the child, and one of the following must apply:
- “The parents divorced;
- The parent abused or neglected the child;
- The parent has been incarcerated, found incompetent, or died;
- A court-order terminated the parent-child relationship; or
- The child has lived with the grandparent for at least six months.[ii]”
Note that if the grandchild was adopted by someone other than the step-parent, a grandparent may not request visitation, possession and access.
For more thoughts or information about grandparent possession and access, call Leslie Barrows.
About Us: For more information please contact The Barrows Firm in Southlake.
If you would like more information about The Barrows Firm, P.C., please contact the firm by calling (817) 481-1583. The Barrows Firm is located at 700 East Southlake Boulevard in Southlake near the Town Square.
You can follow The Barrows Firm on social media and find important articles and resources about Texas law and how it may affect you or your family. The Barrows Firm is on Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn. To read client endorsements and reviews of Attorney, Leslie Barrows, please visit her Avvo.com profile.
[i] Troxel v. Granville, 530 U.S. 57, 65; 120 S. Ct. 2054, 2060 (2000).
[ii] Texas Attorney General, Senior Texans, Grandparents’ Page.
Narcissistic personality disorder & divorce
Narcissistic personality disorder & divorce
A spouse with narcissistic personality disorder may prefer a court battle. In a recent article in Psychology Today, issues involving narcissists and divorce are highlighted to help people understand and respond appropriately to typical narcissist behavior. The article suggests you are going to court because your narcissist spouse’s, “refusal to discuss terms on any reasonable basis. Going to court and having a judge decide may actually make the narcissist more comfortable because it means he or she doesn’t have to take responsibility for the outcome, especially if it’s not favorable.[i]”
The narcissist wants to battle in court and have plenty of attention.
The narcissist wins by engaging you in a court battle. The narcissist makes it all about them. If they are the ones to start the court battle it is because they are in it to win it and they seek attention through battling you. If you cause them to respond to litigation they still win because it means they are the victim and will seek attention through others who pay attention to their pity party.
Tips on spotting and addressing narcissists in divorce:
- Obstruction at all levels as a strategy;
- Refusing to negotiate or settle anything;
- Spending money to run up your bills;
- Taking any opportunity to make you look bad;
- Going back to court frequently, even after the divorce.
Narcissists in divorce may love playing games.
In divorce, the narcissist with money to spend on litigation can tie a divorce and custody case up for a long time if they know how to take advantage of the court system. The longer they can hold their spouse over a barrel and keep spending everyone’s time and resources, the more likely the narcissist will win by simply exhausting everyone else involved.
Experienced divorce attorneys can usually spot these situations from a mile away and will respond accordingly to protect their client from being on the wrong end of frivolous and ongoing divorce litigation. The courts can help limit a narcissist from causing a family law case from getting out of hand. This is especially important when the narcissist is not likely to stop filing things just because the original divorce case is concluded.
For more thoughts about narcissism and divorce, call Leslie Barrows.
About Us: For more information please contact The Barrows Firm in Southlake.
If you would like more information about The Barrows Firm, P.C., please contact the firm by calling (817) 481-1583. The Barrows Firm is located at 700 East Southlake Boulevard in Southlake near the Town Square.
You can follow The Barrows Firm on social media and find important articles and resources about Texas law and how it may affect you or your family. The Barrows Firm is on Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn. To read client endorsements and reviews of Attorney, Leslie Barrows, please visit her Avvo.com profile.
[i] Psychology Today, 13 essential tips if you are divorcing a narcissist, by Peg Strep, May 11 ,2016.
Domestic Violence & Self-Defense
Domestic Violence & Self-Defense
Domestic violence and self-defense are topics more openly discussed in the present day after too many years of family violence being swept under the rug. It is a good thing that more domestic violence victims have support systems and accessible court procedure to help obtain protective orders. That said, protective orders and support will not stop a violent aggressor who does not care about following rules and laws.
Just last week in an episode of Fox Television’s drama, “911,” the former spouse of a domestic violence victim sought out to do harm and stab to death a person who helped his ex-wife get away from him in a family violence scenario. If someone really wants to do harm, they can. Being prepared to defend yourself from an attack is your best defense.
Escaping Domestic Violence
To escape domestic violence is to escape the abuse and control of another. A common component in abusers is their obsession with control. In many cases we see abusers move them and their spouse away from family, friends and support systems that the abuser cannot control. What the abuser can control is their spouse’s access to other people, places and the money necessary to live from day to day.
While some domestic violence victims go into hiding, some escape in plain sight and their abuser knows right where they are. There is no right or wrong way to escape domestic violence and like every marriage is unique, so is the fallout in every domestic violence situation. Some say attempting to hide and conceal one’s new location and access thereto can make an already angry controlling person outraged, and in that sense, hiding in plain sight might help de-escalate some situations. Note that if your abuser knows how and when to find you, being prepared to defend yourself is wise.
Women’s Self-Defense Classes
In women’s self-defense classes, instructors commonly mention that one does not need to carry a weapon to defend themselves if they are trained in proper self-defense. Knowing how to fight back if attacked, and the positive emotional benefit of same can contribute to whether a victim survives an attack if their aggressor comes for them.
Remember that at the end of the day a protective order is nothing more than a piece of paper. If you are a domestic violence victim with a protective order you should call 911 if your aggressor comes for you in violation of the order. Remember, however, first responders may be several minutes away from saving you. Are you prepared to save yourself?
For more thoughts about domestic violence and self-defense, call Leslie Barrows.
About Us: For more information please contact The Barrows Firm in Southlake.
If you would like more information about The Barrows Firm, P.C., please contact the firm by calling (817) 481-1583. The Barrows Firm is located at 700 East Southlake Boulevard in Southlake near the Town Square.
You can follow The Barrows Firm on social media and find important articles and resources about Texas law and how it may affect you or your family. The Barrows Firm is on Twitter, Facebook and LinkedIn. To read client endorsements and reviews of Attorney, Leslie Barrows, please visit her Avvo.com profile.
Leslie Barrows is accepted into CLASS 2018 – Carroll Leadership Academy for Supporting Success
Leslie Barrows is accepted into CLASS – Carroll Leadership Academy for Supporting Success
Southlake, Texas – Feb. 5, 2018 – Southlake family law and juvenile law attorney, Leslie Barrows, of The Barrows Firm, P.C., is accepted into CLASS – Carroll Leadership Academy for Supporting Success for 2018
Leslie Barrows, the Southlake family law and juvenile law attorney, is mother of three boys in the Carroll Independent School District (CISD) and was seated earlier this year as a member of the Carroll Education Foundation (CEF) Board of Trustees. The CEF raises money for programs benefiting CISD students and staff where money is not otherwise allocated in the CISD operating budget.
Recently Barrows was nominated and accepted into CLASS 2018. Ten years ago, in 2008, CLASS was formed with a vision to create the most highly informed school district community in the State of Texas. Barrows will attend the next CLASS meeting on February 27th and meet other members who are parents and citizens in the community who will learn about the organizational operation of CISD. At the February meeting the group will be introduced to CLASS and its vision as well as the core values of CISD.
The CLASS 2018 Agenda Topics:
- School Finance;
- Curriculum and Instructional Technology;
- Student Roundtable Discussions;
- CISD Board and Community Relations;
- Campus Administrator Roundtable Discussions;
- School-based Classroom Visits at Carroll Senior High School;
- The Role of the Board of Trustees/Carroll ISD Trustees Roundtable;
- CLASS of 2018 graduation ceremony with Board of Trustees at Carroll ISD Board Meeting.
Leslie Barrows recently stated about being nominated and accepted to CLASS 2018, “I sincerely appreciate being invited to this group and learning more about our children’s schools and environment. Together we can all share information with one another to bolster the CLASS vision of creating the best-informed school community in Texas.”
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About The Barrows Firm
The Barrows Firm is located near the Southlake Town Square at 700 East Southlake Boulevard, Suite 170 in Southlake, Texas. If you would like more information about The Barrows Firm, P.C., please contact the firm by calling (817) 481-1583.
You can follow The Barrows Firm on social media and find important articles and resources about Texas law and how it may affect you or your family. The Barrows Firm is on Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn and on Avvo.com.
Leslie Barrows is a new Carroll Education Foundation Board member
Leslie Barrows Carroll Education Foundation
Southlake, Texas – Jan. 1, 2018 – Southlake family law and juvenile law attorney, Leslie Barrows, of The Barrows Firm, P.C., is a new Board of Trustees member for the Carroll Education Foundation, supporting the Carroll Independent School District.
Leslie Barrows offers good judgment and experience to the Carroll Education Foundation (CEF) and feels honored to be appointed to the Board of Trustees. “I have worked with and served as a volunteer among several local and charitable organizations here in Southlake and in Tarrant County and I look forward to working with the other new appointees and all the community leaders who are members of the Carroll Education Foundation Board,” Barrows stated. “Together we can all combine our skills and assets in continuing to support the Foundation and raise awareness of Foundation efforts and events.”
Supporting the educational programs of the Carroll Independent School District (CISD), the CEF, formed in 1996, carries forth its mission: To enrich, expand and protect excellence in education by creating and distributing resources for the benefit of the students of the Carroll Independent School District.[i]
The CEF provides funding for CISD programs and activities that are not included in the District operating budget. Student achievement and skill development is a focus of CEF funding efforts as well as highlighting staff excellence.
Barrows was appointed to the CEF Board of Trustees among five other fine community leaders, Rebecca Hindman, Tracey McDevitt, Kirran Moss, Diane Thomas and Theresa Wright. Together they join the currently seated board members, Robin Austin, Ed Brunner, Michelle Clay, Boulton Fernando, Brian Hodges, Heather Jarvis, Alec knight, Douglas Lies, Nolan Ogden, Stephanie Pennington, Chris Prokopeas, Sherri Williams and Annie Zvonecek. Additionally, new officers were appointed, Kathy Talley as Chair, John Irvine as Vice Chair, Julie Doyle as Secretary, Mary O’Toole as Treasurer, Jessica Byrne as an officer at large, and Sarah Mason as Past Chair.[ii]
Next week, January 17 is the "Kendra Gives Back" event benefiting CISD with 20 percent of your purchase when you shop at Kendra Scott in Southlake next Wednesday from 5 to 8 p.m.
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About The Barrows Firm
The Barrows Firm is located near the Southlake Town Square at 700 East Southlake Boulevard, Suite 170 in Southlake, Texas. If you would like more information about The Barrows Firm, P.C., please contact the firm by calling (817) 481-1583.
You can follow The Barrows Firm on social media and find important articles and resources about Texas law and how it may affect you or your family. The Barrows Firm is on Twitter, Facebook, LinkedIn and on Avvo.com.
[i] Southlake Carroll Education Foundation website, About Us.
[ii] Carroll Education Foundation press release: Carroll Education Foundation Announces Six New Board Members and Five New Officers, Jan. 3, 2018.
